All My Life
by Canadoll
Summary: When two people meet at an airport and sparks fly, how far will they go to be together when they live on different continents? Australian Edward and Canadian Bella struggle to overcome major obstacles to find the love only they can provide each other. All human - Canon Couples - M for Language and Lemons.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Welcome to my new story! This one has been fully planned out through all the angst to the happily-ever-after I promise will happen at the end.**

**Please feel free to drop me a line with any comments, concerns, predictions, etc.**

**This is unbeta'd for now though I hope someone will step up to the plate.**

*****Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight. I'm just playing dress up*****

* * *

My name is Isabella Marie Swan. I was born in a small town called Forks in the state of Washington, but for a long time my home has been Toronto, Canada. When my mother had enough of small town America, we left my father and spent the next few years travelling the continent for our home. After living three years in Phoenix, two years in Jacksonville, four years in Raleigh and one short stint in Manhattan, we managed to finally put down roots in Etobicoke, the western suburb of Toronto.

By the time I graduated high school and began university, my father had become seriously ill with prostate cancer. He died within weeks of the diagnosis, leaving me a rather large inheritance from his life insurance. Charlie Swan was the Chief of Police in Forks and a good man. I regret that we were never able to have a closer relationship, but it simply wasn't possible with my harebrained mother dragging me all across North America through much of my childhood.

Renee Dwyer is my mother. She recently married the coach for the Toronto Blue Jays named Phil Dwyer and together they bought a beautiful house in Rosedale, the richest area of Toronto. Phil travels a lot for away games and sometimes Renee goes with him, leaving me to babysit their house. I don't mind; my small condo in Downtown Toronto sometimes feels claustrophobic, so the change is usually welcome.

I attended University of Toronto studying anthropology and then did a Master's degree in social work. My best friend is Alice Brandon, a short little pixie with boundless energy. We met in high school and were inseparable ever since. Alice is currently working on her PhD at UofT in women's studies, focusing on feminism in the fashion industry. She has been dating Jasper Whitlock as long as I've known her.

I have been working at Mind's Eye Employment Centre for two years now as a counselor for unemployed people. It's my job to help those with difficulties maintaining regular employment to get back on track and become self-supportive in whatever capacity I can. Some days are really long and stressful, but overall the work is very rewarding. I'm especially happy when I have a break through with one of my clients to help them succeed in life. I also spend a few hours every week volunteering at the Toronto Humane Society and on holidays I help out at the Toronto Downtown Mission serving hot meals.

My other good friend is Rosalie Hale, who also works at the centre. She's tall and beautiful with legs that never seem to end and an attitude that can make a man's testicles shrink to the size of raisins. She is a feminist and self-proclaimed lesbian, but I know Rose also has interest in men. She's just very picky and usually frightens them away before they ever have a chance.

Alice and Rose get along swimmingly, and it's not uncommon for the three of us to spend a lot of our free time together. Jasper learned quickly that Rose is not someone to contend with, so he's happy enough to let us have our girlie time together. Not that Rose and Jasper don't get along, but Rose's general hostility to anything with a penis tends to make him feel uncomfortable around her. I don't blame him one bit. If I had a penis, Rose would frighten the ever loving shit out of me.

As for my love life, well, that's a depressing story. I grew up with very little interest in dating, mostly due to my complex about our frequent moving, but also because very few men ever caught my eye. Even as a teenager my mother would tell me I had the soul of an old lady. This translated to very little patience for the immature antics of the less delicate sex. Don't get me wrong, I am as straight as they get (despite Rose's efforts). I'm just rarely inspired to jump into anything beyond two or three dates with the same person.

So that's me in a nutshell. I work hard, I have the two best friends anyone could ask for, and I'm perpetually single. It's a quiet life but I enjoy it. I don't expect this to last forever – I'm only twenty seven years old and there are plenty of things I still want to do, but for now this suits me.

XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoX

"Bella, what are you up to?" Rachel asked as she waltzed into my small, windowless, drab office. I turn away from my computer to look at her.

"Just finishing up some exit reports for the meeting tomorrow. What's up?"

She had a mischievous glint in her eyes that I didn't trust one bit. "Aside from trying to get you to come out with Will and I this weekend, there's an emergency meeting in twenty minutes and the big boss wants you there."

I flinched, thinking about how Rachel was always trying to set me up with her brother. "Okay, tell Leah I'll be there," I said, turning back to my work. I heard Rachel's disgruntled sigh and was grateful when I heard my office door close behind her. The last thing I wanted was to be harassed about being single yet again.

I finished up some comments on my most recent client – a recent university graduate with a severe physical disability – and made my way to the boardroom with notebook in hand. I had no idea what this meeting could be about and my interest was piqued.

I sat down in an uncomfortable plastic chair next to Rose, who was on the phone arguing with her on-again-off-again girlfriend, Tanya. They were always fighting about something. Frankly I'd be surprised if they were being all gushy and lovey. They seemed to have a love/hate relationship and I wondered for the hundredth time why Rose even bothered. Tanya was not the nicest person I'd ever met and that's putting it mildly.

Rose hung up the phone and within seconds Leah was in the room. Everyone hushed in the presence of our Managing Director.

"Okay everyone, listen up. I know you're all very busy so I'll make this quick. Someone with more power and fewer brain cells than anyone here has decreed we need to send two people to the Non-Profit Conference in Los Angeles next week." The room buzzed with excitement. "Before anyone gets too enthusiastic, I've already chosen who's attending. Congratulations to Bella and Victoria, assuming you're up for a free weekend in LA," Leah said as she glanced at us. I was not thrilled at the idea of spending time with Victoria but a vacation sounded nice.

"Sure," I said in a small voice. "What are the dates?"

Leah smiled and pointed at Rose. "I'll have Miss Hale reschedule your appointments and provide you with the itinerary and flight information. I expect a report from both of you when you return," she said sternly.

After meeting with two more clients and googling the conference, Rosalie and I headed out to the subway station together. Before we parted ways, she handed me the information package for the conference and gave me a tight hug.

"We're still on for Woody's tomorrow, right?" She asked.

I nodded. "I can't miss my weekly fill of Rose versus Tanya," I replied in a snarky tone.

Rose gave me a stern glare before breaking out into a goofy grin and waving goodbye as she walked down to the westbound platform of Dufferin Station.

I barely had the front door locked behind me when my phone rang – the bright, bubble gum "Barbie Girl" indicated to me that Alice was the one calling.

"Hello?" I said, balancing the phone between my ear and shoulder as I shrugged out of my jacket.

"Belllllllla!" Alice trilled loudly, "Rosie told me about L.A! That's so awesome. You have plenty of outfits for this trip, _right_?"

I rolled my eyes, grateful she couldn't see me. "Of course I do. But this is a pretty low key shindig. It's gonna be mostly work stuff."

"Don't roll your eyes at me!" Dammit, how did she know? "The days might be work, but you'll have the evenings off right? Lots of opportunities for dinner and dancing. Oooh, maybe you'll meet a movie star and fall madly in love! But if you see Gerard Butler, hands off – he's _mine_."

"Alice, if I meet Gerard Butler I can guarantee you I won't be going home with him or anyone else in his general vicinity. I'm not going on this trip to meet anyone, especially movie stars. I'll probably be too exhausted after the day's events to think about anything besides room service and a hot bath."

That was clearly not the right thing to say. "Isabella Marie Swan! Don't make me get on that plane with you and drag you out for at least _one_ night of frivolous fun. You know I'll do it," she warned.

I chuckled before replying, "I would never bet against you."

"Good! Now we'll discuss this further at Woody's tomorrow. For now I've gotta get dinner in the oven. See ya tomorrow!" She sang and hung up before I could respond. That's very typical of Alice.

XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoX

It wasn't the first or even fiftieth time I've wondered why our usual hang out is the biggest gay bar in Toronto. On Friday and Saturday nights Woody's was packed to the brim, meaning we had to arrive early to secure a table. I also wondered about my compulsion for being on time when every single one of my friends is always late. That left me stuck alone at our usual table as a range of lesbians tried to pick me up. It never made me uncomfortable because it was women. I've just always wondered what others see in me, and at this place I get hit on by more women than I would by men at a predominantly straight bar.

"There you are!" Rosalie trilled as she danced over to the table. Taking a seat next to me, she gestured for the waitress. "I'll have a Heine, and my friend here will take her usual boring vodka with cran," she ordered, looking at me playfully.

After Rose placed our order, she scanned the bar taking in all the familiar and new faces to this week's party night. I knew she was trying to hone in on a target for the night – Rose loved the young, innocent looking girls. I knew this because she tried to get with me when we first met albeit unsuccessfully.

"Where's Tanya?" I asked casually. Rose's scowl told me all I needed to know.

"I don't give a flying fuck," she snapped. "That girl is _so_ not worth my time right now."

I tried not to smile and instead took a sip of my drink. "What happened this time?"

Rose shrugged her shoulders and replied, "Bitch stole my favourite fluvogs, the high cut red ones. I had to practically break down her door to get them back. You know she had the nerve to play innocent? Like those fucking boots walked themselves over to her apartment without my knowledge!"

I shook my head in mock horror and wondered where Alice could possibly be. And speak of the devil…

"Bella! Rosie! I'm _so_ glad to see you guys. What an awful week," she complained as she slumped down in her chair next to Rose. "This comps year is killing me. Do you know how many books I've had to read about women's plight in the Malaysian garment industry? And don't get me started on Marxist feminism – I'm absolutely done with it. Why do they insist on shoving his ideas down our throats?"

I had to smile. Alice's enthusiasm, even when upset, has always been a source of amusement for me, except when she directed it towards me.

"Well, nevermind all that. What are we drinking tonight?" She asked, motioning for the waitress.

I looked down at my drink. "Same as usual for me, please. And I think Rose is in the mood for beer."

Alice winked at me before saying, "Three pina coladas, por favor. And three Sicilian kisses!"

I groaned. "Alice, are you trying to kill me? You know what that shit does to me," I whined.

Her grin grew astronomically. "Exactly. I need you good and drunk before you agree to go shopping for your big trip to L.A. When do you leave?"

I crossed my arms over my chest like a little kid and huffed, "I'm gone Wednesday til Sunday, and I am _not_ going shopping. I already told you this trip is gonna be more work and less play. I have a full complement of business attire thanks to your past scheming."

Alice rolled her eyes and greedily drank down her cocktail. For a moment I was able to look around and take in our surroundings. The bar was getting increasingly crowded by the minute. Very soon the booths and tables were occupied and people were already on the dance floor, which boasted colourful spotlights and a giant disco ball. I watched with amusement as the regular crowd of drag queens and cross dressers gyrated their hips and bounced around in their three inch stilettos. I never understood how they could walk in those things let alone dance.

"Bella! Are you listening to me?" Alice said as she snapped her fingers in front of my face. Blushing, I realized I'd completely zoned out.

"Sorry, what?"

Alice again rolled her eyes. "I _said_, what's your itinerary like? Do they even give you one day off?"

"Oh, yeah. Well I get there on Wednesday and the actual conference is Thursday and Friday. On Saturday there's some social thing and then I come back on Sunday. It's pretty tightly packed," I replied, hoping she would give up on the idea of shopping.

Suddenly and without warning, Rose growled. Yes, she actually made an animal noise. "What the fuck is _she_ doing here?!"

"Who?" Alice and I said at the same time.

Rose pointed toward the bar. "Tanya fucking Denali, that's who. I'm gonna put that bitch in her place," Rose said angrily as she jumped out of her seat and stormed to the bar.

"This should be good," Alice whispered. I couldn't help but giggle.

We watched in silence as Rosalie Hale, the scariest woman I know, sauntered over to the bar and tapped on Tanya's shoulder roughly. Tanya turned around and sputtered, obviously surprised to see Rose. We couldn't hear the words being said but their conversation was definitely heated. Rose's arms waved angrily and Tanya's face turned red with rage. They shouted back and forth for a few minutes, riling each other up, then all of a sudden I blinked and they were making out like teenagers.

"Well that might just be a record," Alice mused. I had to agree with her.

The rest of the evening was quieter. Rose never returned to our table, instead opting to leave early with Tanya. Alice didn't try to order me any more outlandish drinks, and after a few more of my conservative concoctions we danced for a bit. I laughed as the most flamboyant drag queen tried to grind with me on the dance floor, to a remix of Friends in Low Places and Cotton Eye Joe, but soon gave up once they realized how uncoordinated I am. I was grateful for a fun night out with Alice but still very happy to go home for the night.

XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoX

I was granted the day off work on Tuesday to allow myself time to prepare for the weekend. On Monday, Leah had met with Victoria and I about what was expected of us at this conference…

_"Just sign in and don't embarrass us. I don't even care if you skip some of the less interesting workshops. Just make sure you have some kind of report ready for the next staff meeting about _something_ relevant," she stated._

_I couldn't help but giggle. "Gee, Miss Clearwater, why don't you tell us how you _really_ feel?" I said sarcastically. Leah rolled her eyes._

_"Since you asked, I'll tell you. I think this is a giant waste of time and resources. The only reason I didn't fight it is because your expenses are being paid by the Board of Governors and not from our meager budget. Trust me, if we had to shell out the dough, you'd both be staying here for the weekend. But, since it's out of my hands, I want you both to take this opportunity to enjoy yourselves. And learn one or two things, please, so I can submit something to the dumbasses upstairs to make them happy."_

So I sat on my queen sized bed in my small one bedroom condo, my suitcase wide open and empty.

_Maybe I should have let Alice taken me shopping after all_.

I got angry at myself for that thought and rifled through my tightly packed closet for appropriate outfits. Once I started, the process was easy. I even added my rarely-used favourite cocktail dress and matching pumps just in case.

After my suitcase was mostly full – minus toiletries and makeup I would use in the morning – I laid down on my bed and stared at the ceiling. I hadn't been out of Ontario for a very long time, and on vacation for even longer. I don't count going to Alice's family cottage on Lake Kennessis, near Algonquin Park, as a real vacation. Especially when she spent most of the time spraying herself with bug spray and hiding inside. I think I spent more time that weekend bonding with Jasper than I did with Alice.

Sure I've had long weekends up north, a couple of visits to Ottawa, and a particular grueling two days in Windsor, but a _real_ vacation was just what I needed. As I drifted off to sleep, I vowed to myself I would book an exotic and extravagant holiday when I returned from LA.

XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoX

When my alarm went off on Wednesday morning, I crawled out of bed, started a pot of fair trade Mexican roast, and jumped in the shower. This was my routine every morning and it never failed to invigorate me for the day: shower, coffee & newspaper, get dressed, pick up breakfast on the way to work. Except today I would be buying my morning meal at the airport instead.

The hot water felt good as it relaxed the tension in my shoulders and back. I've never been very good with flying so I'd been edgy since Leah told us about this trip. I'm not terrible about being in an enclosed metal tube with dozens of other people, soaring at ungodly speeds with only two inches of glass keeping me from being sucked out into the sky, but it's never been one of my favourite things to do. I've always been more excited for the destination than the trip itself.

That's why I only made half a pot of coffee this morning, which I swallowed greedily as I read the headlines in the Toronto Star. _Gunfight in Rexdale leaves four dead_. _Mayor threatens to cancel Pride Celebration over proposed Hanlan's Point float_. _Gas prices soar in new financial crisis_.

I shook my head sadly, wondering why I bothered keeping up with the news. There was never anything happy or promising to read anymore.

I was pulled out of my reverie when the buzzer sounded, indicating Alice had arrived to drive me to the airport. I hastily threw the remaining coffee in a travel mug, finished packing my suitcase, and made it to the lobby of my building in record time to find Alice standing by her car, arms crossed, tapping her foot impatiently. She hates to be kept waiting.

Giving her my best sheepish smile I said, "Sorry Alice!"

She frowned before returning my grin. "I know, I know. Come on, let's get you to the airport. I have a million things to do today that _don't_ include waiting around for my best friend."

XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoX

To say that Lester B. Pearson International Airport was busy would be an understatement. It felt more like the New York Stock Exchange during trading hours, though I had never seen it in person. There were groups of people and individuals carrying bags and suitcases around, some families, a few couples, and lots of single people. It was noisy and chaotic, but for some reason I loved it.

I loved watching as old friends hugged farewell, as parents ushered their children along, as young women struggled with too many suitcases, and as people scurried around afraid to miss their flights. I especially loved the amount of ethnic diversity in the crowd of people and was grateful, once again, to live in such an open and free society.

Alice stood beside me dutifully as I waited in the long line to check in. Once my luggage was taken down the moving conveyer belt, she decided it was time to leave. She gave me a quick hug and peck on the cheek before dancing back to her car. I quickly made my way to the Tim Horton's in the food court area, needing my morning meal before the flight. I glanced at my phone and realized I still had nearly two hours before my plane boarded, so I slowed my pace and enjoyed the atmosphere around me.

After retrieving my usual breakfast of bagel & cream cheese, I sat at a metal table and watched my surroundings as I ate. Have I mentioned I'm an avid people watcher? It's one of my favourite hobbies. My other favourite hobby is reading, which I realized I would likely need to do on a plane where I couldn't very well look around me without seeming creepy. Once I finished my breakfast, I headed over to Chapter's to find something to pique my interest.

The first section I always check is where the Nicholas Sparks books are housed – yes I know, it's cheesy, but I'm a sucker for a sappy romance story. Seeing nothing new, I decided to head for the culture & community section, hoping to find a decent ethnography I hadn't read before. I was debating between a life history of a Korean shaman and a biography of a first nations chief when I was thrown off balance by something hard knocking into me.

"I'm so sorry, miss," said a beautiful, melodic voice. A pair of strong hands reached down to help me up off the floor and for a moment I was mesmerized by the long fingers attached to my own as I was lifted up. I was so entranced I barely noticed the electric current buzzing on my skin from his touch. _Almost_.

"Are you okay? I should have watched where I was going. I'm so sorry," he said again.

I finally tore my eyes away from his beautiful hands and gazed into the face of an angel. Seriously. He was pale, though not as much as me, and tall. _Really_ frickin' tall. He had a square jawline that framed a perfectly symmetrical face with high cheekbones, thick eyebrows, and absolutely striking green eyes. His only imperfection was a slightly crooked nose that I barely noticed over his perfectly formed lips and light dusting of facial stubble.

I recognized him right away. "Are… are you… Robert Pattinson?" I stuttered out.

His laugh showed a row of perfect white teeth and his adam's apple bobbed deliciously. "No, I'm afraid not. But I get that a lot. Name's Edward." He flashed me a heartwarming grin where one side of his mouth raised slightly higher than the other. Somehow, on him, it was perfect. Just like everything else about him. His grin widened as he watched me ogle him. He broke my gaze by reaching down to the floor, and my heart started thudding in my chest as I imagined what he could possibly be doing.

"I'm sorry again. Here," he said as he handed me the books I'd been contemplating not thirty seconds ago. I reached out and took them from him, my hand accidentally brushing his fingers. There was that electricity again. I snatched my books back quickly as his hand retreated just as speedily.

_Did he feel it too?_

I could almost hear Alice's voice telling me to grow a set and say something.

"Um… thanks." _Wow. An Oscar winning performance._

"No problem," he said as he flashes me another crooked smile. "Do you fancy a cup of joe?" For the first time I noticed his unusual accent.

"Sure," I said as I checked my watch. I still had plenty of time. "Let me just pay for these…" I said as I looked at my books. _Oh fuck it, I'll get them both._

After making my purchase I followed Edward back toward the Tim Horton's I had just visited. The lineup was long and I didn't really relish the idea of standing there. Edward seemed to read my mind.

"Why don't you go sit down and I'll get us some drinks?"

I turned to him and said, "You don't have to do that. I can buy my own."

He smiled and shook his head. "After I nearly killed you back there, you should sit and rest. It's the least I can do," he said, gesturing toward Timmie's.

"Okay…" I said hesitantly, searching his beautiful eyes for a trace of doubt. There was nothing there but amusement. "I'll have a small iced latte, please." Edward nodded and gestured toward the metal tables. I found us an empty one and placed my bags on the ground beside me as I sat facing toward him. Part of me was afraid he was just a mirage I dreamed up in some kind of stupor. _Nobody can be that beautiful_, I thought to myself.

It wasn't long before he joined me. "You know, I realized I don't even know your name."

I blushed furiously, feeling like a complete idiot. "I'm Bella Swan," I said, shakily extending my hand toward him. He grabbed it and shook it furiously. Yep, the electricity passing between our skin was still there.

"Nice to meet you, Bella Swan. I'm Edward Cullen."

I took a long sip of my drink to buy some time so I could formulate rational thoughts. "Where are you from?"

"Australia. You ever been?" I shook my head no. "Ah, you'd love it I think. Most people do. It's beautiful and friendly," he said wistfully.

Finally garnering enough courage, I asked, "Which part?"

He smiled at me before responding, "Maroochydore. It's a large town about three hours north of Brisbane, on the Sunshine Coast. Great surfing," he said as he winked at me.

I felt the blush rise to my cheeks as I pictured this beautiful man shirtless with board shorts hanging low on his hips…

"What about you Bella? Where are you from?" He asked before taking a huge gulp of his coffee.

"Oh, um, Washington originally. But Toronto's been my home for a long time now. It's not as glamourous as Australia, but I love it here anyway," I babbled.

"And what do you do here in Toronto?" He asked.

"I'm a social worker at a non-profit organization. We help people who fall through the cracks in the system get back on track with things. With their lives, I mean," I fumbled. "What do you do?"

He nodded as if he was contemplating something before he responded. "I'm a chef. I run my own catering business in the great Down Under. It's not as noble as your work, but it pays the bills." He gave me another lopsided grin that had me moist in the panties.

"And what brought you to Toronto?"

He shrugged. "It's actually just a stopover. I had a wedding in Montreal and now I'm on my way back home. It's too bad," he said as he looked toward the large windows across the terminal. "If Toronto is as nice as you say then I should have made a point of leaving the airport."

My jaw dropped. "You didn't spend any time here?"

He smiled and shook his head. "Don't give me that look, pretty girl. Until just now I didn't know I'd be missing anything. Besides, I'm not much of a big city boy and I had my fill in Montreal."

_Did he just call me pretty? Cue swooning…_

His bright green eyes grew a shade darker as he seemingly stared right into my soul. "But maybe I'll have to plan another trip in the future, with you as my tour guide." Before I could untangle my tongue and respond, he checked his watch. "My flight's booked to leave in a half hour. Where are you headed today?"

I smiled politely, still reeling from his charm. "I'm off to Los Angeles for a conference."

"Flight 72?" He asked.

I frowned. "How did you know?"

He chuckled lightly. "That's mine too. Gotta catch a connecting flight in LA, then another in Hawaii, and yet another in Sydney. It's a long trip to get home. But anyway, we should get to the boarding gate to make sure they don't leave without us," he said as he stood and stretched. His pale blue button down short sleeved shirt rose up as he did so, giving me a very fine view of his muscled lower torso. I'm pretty sure I started drooling before his laugh interrupted me.

"Come on then, peeping Sheila," he said as he reached out his hand to help me up. I swearthe blush on my face was going to be permanent.

I silently gathered my belongings and took his hand, again feeling that delicious spark that began at my hand, traced through my heart and made its home in my panties. When he dropped my hand I felt empty at the loss of contact, but I couldn't very well hold hands with a near stranger. Could I?

When we arrived at the gate I noticed the plane was already boarding. We got in line and waited for our turn, each of us handing over our boarding passes to the very attractive flight attendant. I noticed with ire that her smile widened for Edward and her chest puffed out a bit too. I fought back the irrational jealousy that swarmed over my heart at the thought of him responding to her.

_What the fuck? I just met him. I have no claim over him. Calm the fuck down!_

We walked down the long corridor silently side by side. I have no idea what was going through his head but mine was full of anxiety – both for the flight I was dreading and the thought of leaving him. Nobody had ever elicited such a strong reaction from me before and I wanted to cherish it. As we stepped onto the plane and yet another flirty flight attendant pointed us to our seats, Edward turned to me.

"It was great meeting you, Bella Swan. Enjoy your flight," he said, his eyes darting between mine.

I gave him the biggest smile I could muster. "Thanks Edward Cullen. You too."

_Wow. _I mentally chided myself for being so uninventive with words.

We walked to our separate seats – him in business class, me in economy, and I'd never felt so morose in my life. Well, not that I could remember anyway. I stowed my carry-on in the overhead compartment, minus my two new books, and sighed as I crawled over an elderly lady to my window seat. I stared out the window, trying to fight the tears threatening at the corners of my eyes.

_Quit being such a wimp. You don't know him, he doesn't know you, and there's no reason to cry_.

Yeah right.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: I kind of expected this chapter to go longer but decided I'd better cut it off where I did. I love these characters so much and I'm having way too much fun drawing out their life stories!**

**Please feel free to leave me some words, whether good or bad, to let me know you're out there. :)**

*****Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight. I just borrowed her lunch money.*****

* * *

I gripped my seat firmly, my nails digging into the cheap cloth fabric nervously as I listened to the sounds of the pre-flight preparations. The flight attendants had just secured the doors and were about to start the mandatory safety presentation, but my thoughts were firmly fixed on the sounds of grinding and metal shifting. I must have looked a little green when the woman next to me decided I needed some comforting.

"Are you nervous dear?" I could only nod as I ground my teeth together. "I used to be like that too. Nowadays I find some liquid courage helps." I looked over as she showed me the flask she concealed in her purse. _What the…?_

Thankfully she kept to herself after that and I found myself relaxing a bit as the flight attendants finished their speech and buckled in for take-off. If they weren't concerned with anything then it must be okay. I held my breath as we taxied down the runway and eventually lifted off the ground. Once we had finished ascending and I was allowed to remove my seat belt I felt much better.

Deciding I didn't want to converse with my neighbor, I pulled out my iPod and stuck the earbuds in my ears. I hit shuffle and opened up my book on the Korean shaman, curling into the window as much as I could. I really hoped she wasn't going to force me into conversation. Unfortunately I couldn't concentrate on anything except the recent memory of striking green eyes and deliciously tousled dark blonde hair with reddish highlights. Closing my eyes and letting out a deep sigh, I must have drifted off before I was startled awake by a light jab to the ribs.

I opened my eyes and jumped a little, pulled out my headphones and looked to my right expecting to see a drunken granny ready to chat me up. Boy was I surprised when I saw Edward-greek-god-Cullen seated next to me.

"What are you doing here?" I asked.

He chuckled. "I got bored in my large, roomy seat so I traded with Mrs. Doubtfire. She was more than happy to upgrade to free champagne," he said with a playful smirk.

Laughter bubbled up and out of my throat. "I bet she was!"

His smirk grew larger as he said, "I wouldn't have roused you but I'm not sure you would have been happy having your neighbours hear your sleep talking."

_Oh no…_

I blushed furiously. "What did I say?"

He winked at me. "That's for me to know and you to fret about."

Thankfully my embarrassment was temporarily forgotten when the flight attendant brought her cart to us and asked if we would like a complimentary light snack or beverage. I took a hard-as-a-rock bread roll and some margarine while Edward declined the offer. The flight attendant was the same one who had taken our boarding passes and looked quite disappointed at Edward's refusal.

"If there's _anything_ I can provide for you, please feel free to let me know," she cooed. Edward only nodded and turned back to me.

"So you're going to LA for a conference?" He asked. I almost grinned as the flight attendant, whose nametag said 'Lauren' sputtered and frowned before continuing on her way.

"Yes, for work. One of my other coworkers should be around here somewhere," I said as I realized I hadn't seen Victoria at all. _Oh well, definitely not my loss_.

"So no big holiday for you," he said with a cheeky grin.

"I wish! I mean, I'll have some free time I guess. Alice wanted me to paint the town red but that's never really been my thing. I'll probably end up on the beach somewhere collecting seashells. There aren't many of those in Toronto."

"Aren't many seashells?" He asked.

I couldn't help but giggle like a little girl. "That too. Lake Ontario isn't exactly known for its year-round access to expanses of sand. Figured I might as well take advantage while I can."

Edward shrugged his broad shoulders. "Eh, if you've seen one beach you've seen them all. Sounds like Alice might have a good idea."

It was my turn to shrug indifferently. "Alice is my best friend and I love her, but we're so different it's scary. You know she wanted to take me shopping just for this trip?" I rolled my eyes dramatically.

"The fiend! Not _shopping_, surely!" He mocked, so I slapped his arm playfully.

Our conversation flowed freely after that. We talked about our jobs and friends, likes and dislikes, family quirks, bad habits, and childhood memories. I learned we had a lot in common but in some ways we were polar opposites.

For instance we both had varying tastes in music, most of our likes being very similar: Debussy, The Beatles, Third Eye Blind, Frank Sinatra, and most 80s hair metal bands. Neither of us had ever been to Europe though we were both anxious to go. We were both dog people, loved old movies, and couldn't stand the smell or taste of pickles.

Conversely, Edward enjoyed small town life while I've always been a city girl. He had several tattoos where I've always been afraid of needles. And when I started discussing why I went into social work he seemed remarkably uninformed about the types of global issues that I dealt with on a regular basis.

"So you see, when a significant portion of the population lives in relative poverty, there are so many problems that can arise," I said.

"Like what?" He asked, seeming genuinely interested.

"Well the simplest one is health. If people can't afford healthy food choices because their money is already tied up paying their mortgage or other bills, then disease becomes a bigger issue. And then it's not _just_ the poor, but everyone that is affected. And if people can't afford higher education then the nature of the workforce will encourage higher technology industries to seek workers elsewhere. It's a vicious cycle." I looked at him staring at his hands. "I'm sorry, I get caught up sometimes," I said feeling foolish.

His head snapped up and his eyes bored into mine. "Don't be sorry. These are issues I've never considered before. It's humbling, actually. Makes me feel grateful for the good things in my life."

I lightly touched his arm. "Like what?"

He smiled. "I live a small quiet life, Bella Swan. I spend most of my time running my small catering business, and on my rare days off I go surfing or knock back a few pints with my mates. I own a small two bedroom bungalow near the beach and I rarely leave the Sunshine Coast. Sure I sometimes read the paper, but I've never been exposed to someone so concerned with the welfare of others. It's just… not part of the life I live. I focus on daily living and financial quarters, not how my actions impact the world. It's a different paradigm," he said quietly.

"But Edward, everything you do affects others. None of us is separate from our environment. All those kids starving in Africa should be just as much your concern as anyone else's."

He nodded solemnly like a kid that's been chastised. "I understand that. And don't get me wrong, I'm troubled by the state of things just as much as you. I guess my focus is a little narrower than most."

I smiled at him. "It's okay. Not everyone can do what I do, believe me I get that. It's exhausting sometimes. Sorry if I sound preachy."

He turned in his seat to stare directly at me, making my stomach fill with butterflies. "Never be sorry for your passions, especially those as noble as the ones we just discussed. I may not be the one to tackle these issues, but I salute you, Bella Swan, for having enough metaphorical balls to do so. You're an inspiration to me."

Comfortable silence descended upon us as I contemplated a lot of different things. This man sitting next to me was like no one I had ever met. Although it was his remarkably handsome physique that first caught my eye, talking to him had given me a glimpse of the man underneath the beauty who was every bit as attractive as his appearance.

_But he lives in Australia_, my inner voice reminded me. That realization made me sad.

"Do you have a busy schedule this weekend?" He asked.

I shook my head. "Not as much as I thought. My boss said she doesn't mind if I skip most of the formal proceedings as long as I have enough material for a semi-coherent report," I replied.

"Hmmmmmmmm….." Edward said.

I turned my face toward him. "What was that for?" I asked, trying to quell the excitement building in me.

"Where are you staying?" He asked.

"At the Holiday Inn on Santa Monica beach. The conference is just a few minutes from there at UCLA," I replied, recalling the details from my itinerary.

He nodded and smiled. "Well I was thinking, since I already missed out on such a great city like Toronto, that maybe I should take a few more vacation days and not miss out on seeing Los Angeles." I gasped with shock and excitement. "Or if that's too forward, or creepy, we can forget I ever mentioned it," he tried to backtrack.

I lightly touched his arm, enjoying that electrical current flowing between us. "I like that idea. I've never been to LA before and it would be great to have some company," I said, trying to keep my voice even.

He gave me a wide, crooked grin. "Great! Now that's settled, I could use a quick nap before we land. This whole travelling thing wears me out, and now I don't have to try to make every minute of this flight count."

"Yes of course!" I said, a little too excitedly. He laughed at my enthusiasm and put his chair back, closing his eyes.

I tried my best not to stare at him while he slept. But god help me I couldn't stop from peeking at him every so often. He was too beautiful to ignore.

XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoX

The madness of LAX was even worse than that of Person Airport as I tried to navigate through throngs of people at the arrivals gate. As soon as we were off the plane, Edward had to beeline for the international desk to make sure his luggage wasn't transferred to the next flight he had booked and to re-arrange the rest of his trip home. I'd promised to meet him at the car rental place but had gotten hopelessly lost. As I searched for some kind of non-divine sign to point me in the right direction, I spotted his tangled mess of bronze hair off in the distance. He was leaning against the wall next to what I'd been searching for with a proud smirk. I approached him feeling sheepish with my face probably a crimson colour.

"You're not a very good tour guide," he said teasingly.

I playfully smacked his shoulder and replied, "I know Toronto very well. I've never been here before. This is absolutely crazy," I said as I looked around.

The line-up for Budget Rent-a-car was quite long. I sighed and dutifully walked to the end of the line with Edward following me. Though there were plenty of people in front of me, we got to the counter fairly quickly. I handed over my paperwork and after giving some information to the clerk he handed me a set of keys to a Volkswagen Golf and pointed me toward where the cars were kept. Edward and I lugged our suitcases to the depot and played trunk tetris trying to get everything to fit properly. Soon we were on our way, cruising down the San Diego Freeway in comfortable silence as we took in the sights around us.

At the hotel, I handed over more paperwork and was rewarded with another set of keys. I let Edward know my room number and we agreed that we would get settled and freshen up before meeting for dinner in a couple of hours.

I got to my room and immediately flopped onto the queen sized bed, leaving my suitcases by the door. I was too exhausted to move though I forced myself to reach into my purse and grab my cellphone. I had two voicemails from Leah and Alice, and several texts from Rose. I sent them a group text confirming my safe arrival, set an alarm, and passed out where I laid.

When the loud, grating beeping finally woke me from my slumber, I dragged myself upright and searched through my luggage for my bag of toiletries. I got into the shower and just stood under the hot water, letting the grime and brain fog melt away. I washed my long brown hair with my favourite strawberry shampoo and conditioner, did a quick top up on my shaved legs, and emerged from the steamy room wrapped in a scratchy bath towel. I rifled through my luggage for some fresh clothes and after drying myself dressed in a comfortable pair of dark wash skinny jeans with an off the shoulder maroon tunic top. I then blow dried my hair and put on some mascara and lip gloss. No sooner had I finished when my room phone started ringing.

"Hello?" I answered shyly.

"You ready to get some grub?" Answered a beautiful, melodic voice.

"Sure!" I replied a bit too enthusiastically. "Wanna meet me at the car?"

He chuckled before replying, "Actually I was thinking maybe we could walk and find somewhere close. My legs need to stretch a bit after being cooped up in that plane for seven hours."

"Sounds good. I'll see you in the lobby in five minutes."

I hung up the phone, threw on a pair of ballet flats, grabbed my purse and headed out to the lobby.

XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoX

We wandered along the beach a short way before deciding to check out the Santa Monica Pier. It was nearly sunset and the view of the ocean was spectacular. I found myself torn between wanting to stare at Edward and enraptured by the beauty around me.

We sauntered along the pier, watching teenagers play arcade games and older men fishing off one end of the dock. There were couples walking hand-in-hand, seagulls flying lazily overhead, and the calming sound of the ocean beneath our feet. When I spotted Bubba Gump Shrimp Co., I started jumping up and down like a little kid.

"Oh my gosh, it's just like from Forrest Gump!" I cried excitedly.

Edward cocked one eyebrow at me and said, "I love that movie. Let's go there for dinner."

We were seated at an outdoor table right at the edge of the pier, flanked on one side by the ocean. The breeze had picked up and my hair was blowing in all directions as I tried, and failed, to keep it tamed. Edward laughed at my futile efforts and grinned when I produced a hair elastic out of my purse to tie my mane down. We ordered crab stuffed mushrooms for an appetizer, and I asked for the shrimp shack pasta while Edward opted for the jambalaya. We both ordered bottles of beer to wash down our meal.

"This is beautiful," I said as I stared at the horizon which was now streaked with orange, purple, and pink.

"It's different. I'm used to seeing the sun rise, living on the east side of the country," Edward replied indifferently.

"Do you often do that? Go out to watch the sun come up, I mean?"

He shrugged his shoulders. "I try to get out for a quick romp on the surfboard every morning to start the day. I'm usually out there just after the sun comes up."

I couldn't help laughing. "You're really not interested in anything related to the beach are you?" I said playfully.

He grinned and shook his head. "Sorry, no. It's just not a novelty to me. It's something I see every day, kind of like you and the subway. I've never been on one of those things so I'm much more interested in that."

We continued chatting throughout the meal, really getting to know one another. The food was delicious, the temperature perfect, and the atmosphere very intimate even with a full patio. After sharing a slice of cheesecake for dessert I was feeling a little giddy from all the beer and our conversation turned more personal.

"Do you have a boyfriend back in Toronto?" Edward asked. His eyes looked narrow and tight, but maybe I imagined that.

"Nope. I actually don't date a whole lot," I said before blushing.

"Hmm, why is that?" he asked.

I shrugged my shoulders. "I don't usually have the time, or the interest."

He looked surprised. "Oh. Do you have a girlfriend?"

I clamped my hand over my mouth and giggled. "No," I said between laughs, "I don't swing _that_ way. I'm just not interested in settling for anything less than I deserve. I've had some bad experiences."

"Tell me?" He asked, reaching out for my hand and rubbing circles on my knuckles.

"O-okay," I stuttered at his touch. "Well there was Allastair. He begged me for a date for months before I finally gave in. When I refused to kiss him after our date he never called me again and avoided me at school. Then there was Marcus – he was the captain of the volleyball team and the most popular guy at school. My mother insisted I give him a chance and didn't believe me that he'd had a hard time accepting the word 'no'. I dated Amun for about six months in university before his parents found out and quickly forced him into an arranged marriage with a woman from back home. And I've had a couple of unproductive blind dates since then, at the insistence of Alice, but nothing ever came of them."

It felt weird confessing about my pathetic love life to the spitting image of Apollo, Zeus, and Hercules all in one tasty package. But the look on his face told me he didn't think badly of me – rather, he took pity on my history.

"I'm sorry you've had a rough time of it. Men can be assholes sometimes. They give us good guys a bad reputation," he said as he shook his head sadly.

"It's all in the past," I said as I waved my hand dismissively. "But what about you? What's your story?"

He grinned mischievously. "Well, I've never had a boyfriend or interest in the less delicate of the sexes. As for women, well, that's a different story. I've had two girlfriends. Carmen and I were high school sweethearts until she moved to Japan at the end of year eleven. And then there was Kate…" he trailed off as his green eyes grew sad.

"What happened?" I asked as I held his hand supportively.

He shook his head and pursed his lips as if trying to ward off tears. "She died. It was a congenital heart defect. Something about a ripped valve. Her heart gave out as she drove to work one morning. She pulled off to the side of the highway but by the time the paramedics got there…" He sucked in a deep breath and turned to look at the dark ocean as he squeezed my hand tight.

"I'm so sorry Edward. So very sorry for your loss," I whispered, my heart aching for his pain.

He closed his eyes and whispered "Thank you." After composing himself and taking a few deep breaths, he turned to me and tried to smile. "It's still difficult to talk about, even two years later."

I nodded sympathetically. "We can change the subject if you'd like," I offered.

He nodded. "Good idea. Shall we take a walk down on the beach? It's getting late and I know you have to be up early…"

I glanced at my watch, surprised by the time. "Yes a quick walk would be nice."

Edward flagged down the waitress and, despite my protests, insisted on paying for our entire meal, citing it was the least he could do for the pleasure of my company.

_How amazing is this man?_

We strolled along the beach below the pier, our shoes in hand, enjoying the friendly atmosphere between us. Few words were said; neither of us felt compelled to fill the silence, instead choosing to just _be_. Whenever I looked at Edward he had a lazy smile on his face and the few times I caught him staring at me made my stomach flutter. If I thought Edward during the day was beautiful, then Edward by moonlight was absolutely breathtaking.

After about a half hour, Edward grabbed my hand. "We'd better head back to the hotel."

I nodded and blushed at the contact. He seemed to notice the timbre of my thoughts and immediately dropped my hand from his. I knew I was being ridiculous for feeling hurt about that gesture – after all, I'd known this man less than 24 hours – but I couldn't help it. I pouted most of the walk back to the Holiday Inn.

Edward was a true gentleman and walked me to my door. I was nervous, unsure whether we'd just had a date and if so what the protocol would be. Thankfully the decision was wrenched from my hands as Edward gave me a quick, "Good night, pretty girl" before walking back to the elevator. I watched his retreating form, feeling something akin to disappointment, when he turned his head and winked at me before rounding the corner of the hallway.

I entered my room, changed into pajamas, and got into bed right away. As I drifted off to sleep I replayed our entire evening over and over in my mind.

XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoX

I arrived at UCLA bright and early after having slept fitfully. I was armed with the most mediocre coffee I'd ever tasted and hadn't had time for breakfast. Needless to say I was grumpy, so when Victoria accosted me I was in no mood for her shit.

"Well well, looks like someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed," she said with a sneer.

"Whatever. Where do we register?" Victoria pointed to a table at one side of the foyer where we were standing.

I walked away without a word and got myself signed in for the day. Looking at the list of workshops and speakers made my eyelids droop. _Why the hell were we sent here?_

There was a fundraising tutorial workshop, panel discussion on child psychology, and a lunch speaker series about sustainability. The latter seemed interesting but the first two did not relate to my job in any way and would thus be wasted on me. I briefly thought about playing hooky until lunch but decided against it when Victoria was practically shadowing me. There was never any love between us and I wouldn't put it past her to sully my reputation at work if given the opportunity.

I pulled out my phone and texted Edward.

**_Sorry, can't get out of anything this morning. I'll see what's on schedule for the afternoon. –B_**

He quickly replied.

**_That's okay, I'm gonna hit the waves. Made a reservation for dinner, hope u don't mind. –E_**

I melted a little at those words.

**_Sounds exciting. Where? –B_**

**_None of your business, yet. It's a surprise! –E_**

**_Haha okay fine. I'll txt you when I'm outta here. –B_**

**_Have fun! ;) –E_**

I did _not_ have fun that morning, with the exception of fantasizing about a shirtless, surfing Edward all throughout the grotesquely dull panel discussion. Thankfully the afternoon was a bit better. We watched a new documentary about corporate control followed by a professional networking seminar which was funnier than it was meant to be. By the time 4:00 rolled around I made a fast beeline to my rental car and drove quickly back to the hotel.

After returning to my room I texted Edward quickly to let him know I needed a nap. He replied agreeably and said he would pick me up at 6:30 for dinner. I was so nervous I barely got a half hour's rest before my alarm went off.

XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoX

Edward pulled the car up to the side of a one storey white plaster building in Beverly Hills not far from UCLA. We exited the car as he handed the keys and some money to the valet. He offered me his arm and I linked mine through it as we walked into the building.

It was absolutely beautiful on the inside. It was all contemporary design with clean lines and plain walls decorated only with bronze sconces, and boy did it look expensive. The main dining area had tables of varying sizes all piled into the room, each with fresh white table cloths and padded arm chairs. The booths along one side boasted dark blue plush velvet seats next to a large glass window that allowed a view of the kitchen.

As the hostess took us to our table on the wall opposite the booths next to the windows looking outside I couldn't help but gawk like an awkward teenager.

"Do you like it?" Edward asked. I finally diverted my attention from my surroundings and smiled warmly at Edward.

"It's just lovely. How did you find this place?"

He chuckled. "This is one of flagship restaurants of Wolfgang Puck," he said as if I should know the name.

"Um, who?" I asked feeling embarrassed. Edward's eyes grew as large as saucers.

"He's a world famous chef, Bella. I can't believe you've never heard of him! I've been anxious to eat at one of his restaurants for a very long time," he said as he shook his head.

My cheeks flamed. "Sorry, this is not usually the type of place I'd visit. Despite being a big city girl I operate on a small town budget."

He flashed me a crooked grin. "Well then, since this is my treat, order whatever strikes your fancy."

"Hold on Edward, you bought dinner last night. The least I can do is return the favour," I half whined.

He continued to grin as he shook his head at me. "Absolutely not."

I sighed as I realized I wouldn't win this argument. "Okay fine, but you choose our meals. I'm not even sure what half of this stuff is," I said as I scanned the menu.

"Done!" He said proudly.

Three hours and two bottles of wine later, we were both drunk and giggling as we shared our most embarrassing childhood stories. I was having so much fun I barely noticed the time until I realized the restaurant was nearly empty. I glanced at my watch and gasped.

"Edward it's so late! I have to get up early," I cried.

Edward had long since paid the bill and so we were out of there very quickly with only one setback: we were both far too drunk to get behind the wheel of a car. After getting directions from the hostess we found ourselves outside a very swanky hotel. Edward plopped down his credit card and demanded a room with two beds, waving his finger dramatically at the poor hotel clerk. His drunken sternness made me giggle so hard I thought I would pee myself.

We somehow made our way up to the room, leaning on each other for support, and managed to find our way around. The second Edward laid down on his bed he was out cold, and I wasn't far behind him as I flopped face first onto my bed.

And _that_ was the first night I slept with Edward Cullen.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: I am absolutely overwhelmed at the response for this story so far! Thanks to everyone who's favourited, following, or left comments!**

**In the words of my friend Pablo, shit's gettin' real yo. I'll post some supplemental stuff on my blog at canadollfanfiction in the general region of blogspot in the next day or two.**

*****Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight. I'm just bumming a smoke.*****

* * *

Waking up with a hangover is hell, but trying to drag yourself out of a wine coma is next to impossible. When my alarm went off I nearly threw my phone at the wall. Instead I turned it off, rolled over, and went back to sleep.

I was roused two hours later by Edward poking at my side with one hand and holding his head with the other.

"Bella, you need to get up. It's after nine," he said quietly though his voice sounded like Zeus bellowing down Mount Olympus.

I whined and rolled onto my back. "No it isn't. Turn off the light."

He chuckled and winced at the same time. "That's the sun. I can't turn it off until later tonight."

"Okay fine. But I'm pretty convinced you're the devil sent here to torture me," I almost growled. His responding laugh hurt both our heads.

"Tell you what. I'll run down and find a corner store for some aspirin while you shower. We'll go straight to your conference thingy and I'll just sleep in the car while you do what you need to do. Then we can kneel over the toilet side by side for the rest of the day."

I tried to smile but I'm sure it came out looking like a grimace. "Music to my ears. You really know how to show a girl a good time huh?"

He grin-grimaced. "Baby, you ain't seen nothin' yet!"

XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoX

I couldn't tell you what I did at the conference that morning, except that I was late and refused to take off my sunglasses until the painkillers started to work. I was shuffled from room to room, barely paying any attention, as I prayed for time to go a little faster. I just wanted to get the hell out of there.

Unfortunately luck was not on my side and every time Victoria spoke just a little too loudly I had to fight the urge to slap her. I knew she was doing it on purpose but there was nothing I could do without causing a scene.

When lunch finally rolled around, I was starving. I practically ran for the buffet set up at one end of the main room and filled my plate beyond its maximum capacity. I grabbed the strongest black coffee they offered and made my way to my table. I ignored everyone around me, especially Victoria, and swallowed my food like I hadn't eaten in months. I'm sure if Alice were here she would have been laughing her ass off, but I really didn't care.

I sat through the keynote speaker dutifully and was surprisingly interested in their speech about the power of grassroots organizing before I decided I would skip the afternoon. I ran out to the car to find it completely empty. Worried, I pulled out my phone and texted Edward.

**_Where'd you go? –B_**

**_Walked around the campus a bit to clear my head. Back at the car in 5 min. –E_**

I was inwardly pleased to see Edward seemed to have recovered a bit as he approached the car.

"How was your morning, Miss Swan?" He asked with a cheeky grin.

I groaned. "Awful. Let's go back to Santa Monica before someone sees me leaving," I rushed as I got behind the wheel.

Forty five minutes and several rounds of cussing later, we finally emerged from the insane Los Angeles traffic and pulled into the hotel's parking garage.

"Do you mind if we keep things simple today?" I asked as I closed the car door.

He nodded. "I was going to suggest the same. What say you to room service and a movie night?"

I grinned at him. "Perfect. Your place or mine?"

He pretended to debate for a moment before saying, "I'm in 721. Is six o'clock okay?"

"I'll be there!"

XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoX

What do you wear to visit a near stranger's hotel room for an evening sprawled out on their bed? I had no idea how to even begin answering that question, so I swallowed my pride and called Alice.

"Bella bean! How's sunny LA?" She squealed.

"It's great. Sunny and beautiful."

"Have you seen any celebrities?" She said excitedly.

I chuckled. "Not yet, but there's always tomorrow."

"Well keep your camera handy. You don't want to miss any opportunities," she warned playfully.

I could hear Jasper in the background say, "What opportunities?"

Alice's voice sounded far away as she replied, "Nothing, Jazz. And quit butchering that poor head of lettuce! I want to eat salad, not rabbit food!"

Jasper grumbled, "Salad _IS_ rabbit food."

Alice became a little more muffled. "Jasper Allan Whitlock! Salad is a healthy meal full of vitamins and minerals!"

I decided it was time to intervene. "Alice! I'm still on the phone!"

Her voice grew louder as I presumed she put the receiver back to her ear. "Sorry, Bells. UGH men!"

I laughed for a moment before launching into the purpose for my call. "What should I wear for an evening of junk food and movies?"

"Bella! I told you to go _out_ and have fun, not to sit around moping in front of the television. And if that's your plan, who cares what you wear?"

I cleared my throat. "Well, um, I sort of met someone…"

"OH MY GOD!" Alice screamed. I could hear Jasper in the background asking what was wrong.

"Ali, calm down. It's no big deal," I said before briefly explaining the situation in really vague terms.

"Al, _what is it_?" Jasper pushed.

"I'll tell you later," she said to him before returning to my predicament. "Okay, you'll want to look casual but not sloppy. And comfortable. _AND_ have easy access in case things get heated…"

I cut her off. "It's not like that. I mean, I'm attracted to him sure, but I don't know if it's reciprocated. I'm going into this assuming we're new friends and nothing more."

"Okay, okay fine. My suggestion is to wear your hair loose, put on minimal make-up, and opt for simple tights with a tank top. Sexy but not over the top. And girl, you got the curves to make even _that_ outfit look hot."

So that's exactly what I did after saying farewell to Alice and Jasper and hopping into the shower. Forty five minutes later I was knocking on Edward's door as the butterflies in my stomach were threatening to claw their way up and out my throat. When he opened the door, I sucked in a deep breath at seeing him in track pants and a form fitting t-shirt.

He smirked at my reaction and gestured for me to enter. I walked past him quickly and was taken away at the amount of food set out on the table in his suite.

"Edward! This is insane!" I exclaimed as I turned around to face him.

He shrugged. "I wasn't sure what you liked, so I got a bit of everything." His eyes twinkled with mischief.

We turned on the TV and decided on our first movie – Snakes on a Plane, as a tribute to how we met – before digging in. There was fried chicken, sliders, macaroni salad, garlic bread, doughnuts, chocolate mousse, and of course popcorn. Edward had also selected a variety of sugary drinks and bags of candy. Clearly he was on a mission to make me fat.

We nibbled on the food throughout the movie, sitting at opposite ends of the couch, laughing hysterically at Samuel L. Jackson's crazy antics. I knew it was supposed to be an action film but it was so campy it was hilarious. Edward seemed to agree.

After that we decided we would each choose a movie. Edward went first, choosing Glengarry Glen Ross. I had never even heard of it before but it wasn't long before I was totally into it.

For my turn I chose The Notebook. Yeah I know it's cheesy, but it's always been one of my favourites. I ignored Edward's eye roll as he pressed the play button but noticed he seemed captivated by it. He even looked annoyed when I asked to pause the movie for a bathroom break, though I'm sure he would never admit it. When the end credits started, I had to reach for the remote to turn off the television as Edward showed no signs of movement.

"Edward? Are you okay?" I asked tentatively.

He nodded slightly. "Just made me think, that's all." His voice was thick with buried emotion.

"About what?"

He let out a long, slow breath. "Lots of different things. Love, family, destiny, death. I've always avoided this movie on principle but there's a great deal of philosophy behind it. I wasn't expecting that."

"How so?" I asked, completely intrigued.

He smiled sadly. "I was only with Kate for one year. We weren't even living together. We'd never talked about the future or our expectations but I always thought we had an understanding. Looking back I can't say I loved her, but I thought I did. We got along great and rarely argued. I always knew she'd make a great mom."

I scooted closer to Edward and placed one hand gently on his arm, ignoring that electric buzz under my fingertips. "You don't have to talk about this if you don't want," I offered. But truthfully I wanted to hear about Kate and hoped he wouldn't back off. My silent request was granted.

"I know. I want to," he whispered as he gave me a timid smile. I just nodded for him to continue. "Anyway, when I got the phone call she had died I was devastated. Girlfriend or not it's hard to lose someone close. I stared at my bedroom wall for two days before Tanya broke in and force fed me. I was nearly catatonic from what she says."

_Who the hell is Tanya?_ I wondered. I made a mental note to ask about her later.

"And then at the funeral, which I nearly didn't attend, I found out was I wrong about my future with Kate. She'd been having an affair with someone from her office for over three months. That bastard had the nerve to show up at her funeral crying like a baby. Apparently she was planning to leave me for him and they were secretly engaged," Edward said as his fists balled with anger.

"Oh God, Edward I'm so sorry," I whispered.

He shook his head and closed his eyes. "That was a rough time, but I got over it. Or rather I got over _her_, more quickly than I probably should have. That's what made me realize what we'd had wasn't really love." Edward opened his eyes and looked at me. As his gaze settled on my face, I saw the tension melt away from him. "What Noah and Allie went through in The Notebook, that kind of passion, I've never felt. Were they destined to be together or was it random chance that they met? Can anyone have that or are some incapable? How do you know you're making the right choices in life?"

I shook my head sadly. "Those are some big questions. I think when you find _the one_, the love of your life, you just know it. Maybe you don't realize it right away but it's there. Noah and Allie were separated for a long time but neither of them lost their passion for the other. Were they meant to be together? I don't know that I believe in determinism. I think life is a series of choices we're constantly making and reaffirming every day as we try to find happiness. And I believe everyone is capable of being truly happy if they're willing to work for it."

He nodded as his eyes glazed over. "I like that answer."

"And Edward, just because Kate wasn't your lobster doesn't mean you'll never feel that way about someone. She was obviously undeserving and I'm sure there was a part of you that knew that, even if your conscious mind had no idea she was with someone else. I may not believe in determinism but I do believe in intuition and listening to that little voice inside your heart."

He looked at me and cocked one eyebrow. "Lobster?"

I chuckled. "It's from that episode of Friends, you know, when Phoebe says Ross is Rachel's lobster, because lobsters mate for life, and everyone looks at her funny? Kind of like you're doing to me right now," I mumbled as my face flushed with heat.

He burst out laughing. "Man, and I thought we were having a serious discussion here," he bellowed as he gripped his stomach through his laughing fit.

His amusement made me smile broadly. "Yup, leave it to me to ruin the moment."

Edward and I chatted for a few more minutes, most finalizing our plans for the following day, before I started yawning and called it a night.

XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoX

After a slow evening and plenty of sleep, I was delightfully hangover-free come Saturday morning. This was definitely a good thing since Edward and I had the whole day to spend together and our schedule was tightly packed.

We started out with the Hollywood Wax Museum, making sure we both got our pictures taken with the life size replica of Charlie Chaplin. We wandered the walk of fame, admiring all the names, and got a photo of us together with the big Hollywood sign in the background. I shivered with delight when Edward put his arm around my waist for the picture, which I'm sure made his grin even wider.

After that we hopped back into the car and headed for the world renowned sunset strip, wandering past famous bars and nightclubs owned by celebrities. We had an early lunch at a small café then walked back to the car.

We then drove through the downtown core, which was not at all interesting, and back to Beverly Hills, which I found fascinating. I knew Alice would never forgive me if I didn't have proof of going into at least one store on Rodeo Drive, so I had Edward pull the car to the curb as I hopped out to buy her a scarf.

We continued along to our next stop – the ACME gallery – which was not as thrilling as it sounded. By the time we were finished there, both of us were getting pretty tired.

"So it's 3:00 and we've been at it for six hours. I'm pooped," Edward said as he buckled his seat belt.

"I'm so glad you said that. I'm done being a tourist," I said with relief. "What should we do now?"

He had an answer ready for me. "Let's go to the beach!"

An hour later, our arms full of beach provisions, we made a temporary base of operations on Santa Monica beach right outside the hotel. We laid down some beach towels and in between them set up a portable iPod docking station next to a cold bag containing drinks and leftovers from our movie night, along with personal effects. I kicked off my sandals and pulled my shirt over my head, watching Edward's eyes bug out of his skull at the sight of my bikini top. I swear I saw him drool when I pulled down my shorts and cast them aside. I was grateful for having packed my royal blue bikini that doesn't cover a whole lot.

He caught me smiling smugly at him as he ogled my body, and his revenge was quick. Pulling his shirt over his head revealed the sexiest, most defined abs I'd ever seen in person. He placed his hands on my hips to allow me a moment to view the perfection of Edward Cullen's ripped torso, from the small patch of chest hair down to the vee lines on his hips. He looked better in swimming trunks than my imagination could ever have possibly guessed.

I felt my body growing warm – and not from the sun – so I tore my eyes away and sat down on my towel. I fished through my tote until I found my book of Emily Dickinson poetry. Edward's eyes were on me the whole time as he sat down on his own towel.

"I never took you for a classics sort of person," he said, nodding toward my book.

I shrugged. "I like a little bit of everything. I love escaping from modern life with words carefully chosen from another era. It's kind of like a time machine for me."

Edward laid back on the towel, resting his head on his arms. "Okay, inspire me."

I grinned at the challenge and shuffled through the worn pages to my favourite poem, reciting it clearly:

"Love—thou art high—

I cannot climb thee—

But, were it Two—

Who know but we—

Taking turns—at the Chimborazo—

Ducal—at last—stand up by thee—

"Love—thou are deep—

I cannot cross thee—

But, were there Two

Instead of One—

Rower, and Yacht—some sovereign Summer—

Who knows—but we'd reach the Sun?

"Love—thou are Veiled—

A few—behold thee—

Smile—and alter—and prattle—and die—

Bliss—were an Oddity—without thee—

Nicknamed by God—

Eternity—"

"Wow," was all Edward said as the final words rolled off my tongue.

"Yes, it's very powerful. Emily Dickinson wrote about a lot of different things, but her poems about raw human emotion are her better ones I think," I replied.

He nodded slightly. "I can't compare to that," he mumbled so low I barely heard him.

"What was that?" I asked.

He shook his head and said, "Nevermind." Edward jumped up to his feet and pointed toward a shop across the street. "I'll be right back."

I looked to where he pointed and saw the sign: Surfer Rental Shack.

I couldn't help but grin.

XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoX

Watching Edward surf was completely mesmerizing. His muscles rippled in the late afternoon sunlight, water dripping down his firm body, and his hair was a disheveled mess of sexiness. Every time he reached up to comb his hair from his face I felt telltale heat flood between my legs. He was sex personified.

While watching him surf was one thing, trying to learn was an entirely different experience. Sure he was patient with my poor coordination and general inability to stay on the board – even while lying down on it – but I grew increasingly frustrated as time went on. I looked and felt like a chump. After I swallowed a mouthful of saltwater I decided I'd had enough.

"Edward, this is ridiculous. I'm obviously not cut out for surfing," I whined, "I'm going back to the beach towel with what little pride I've got left."

He gave me a cocky grin and a loud "Okay!" just before I turned and stomped back onto the beach. I flopped down quite unladylike on my towel and lay back, covering my face with my arms. A few minutes later I felt a shadow cover my face.

"Don't even think about it. I'm not going back out there," I warned without moving my arms. Boy was I surprised when a deep voice with no hint of accent responded.

"Well I'm glad that's decided. It didn't look like you were having much fun."

I moved my arms and shielded my eyes as I looked up at the figure standing beside me. He was tall and thin, very fit but not as much as Edward. He had knee-length yellow swim trunks that clashed badly with his bright orange hair and very pale skin. I wondered briefly if he could be whiter than me.

"Pardon?" I said, a little flustered.

"Sorry to startle you. My name's Jason," he said as he stuck out his hand toward me.

I reached out and grasped it awkwardly. "Bella."

He sat down in the sand next to me and gave my body a once over which made me very uncomfortable.

"Your boyfriend's not bad, but I'm definitely better," he said with a wink.

"He's not my boyfriend," I squeaked out before I could think. _That's probably what he wanted me to say_. The fact that he inched a bit closer to me was not beyond my notice.

"Is that so? You two looked pretty close."

I swallowed thickly and looked over to Edward, who was watching us closely. "He's just a friend. We're on vacation together."

Jason nodded. "I see. In that case, would you like to get some dinner tonight? I know a great little place over in Malibu that boils an amazing lobster," he said.

"Oh, um, no thanks. I'm headed back to Toronto tomorrow and I'm pretty tired," I lied.

Jason scooted closer and put one hand on my knee. "A Canadian girl huh? I hear those northern kisses are really something…" he said as he leaned closer.

I was fully prepared to sock him in the jaw when all of a sudden he was flung away from me by an enraged looking Edward.

"She said _NO_. Now scamper off!" Edward growled as Jason tripped over himself trying to get up. He held his hands out in surrender.

"Okay bro, calm down. We were just having a little chat," he said as he backed away slowly. Edward's face was beet red and he looked like he was about to explode.

"I said _leave_, now! While you still have your testicles intact!" If possible Jason paled even more before he turned around and started half jogging down the beach. Edward dropped to his knees beside me.

"Are you okay?" he asked.

I nodded. "I'm fine. That guy was creepy but he was going to learn not to mess with me," I boasted proudly even as my hands shook a little.

Edward quirked one eyebrow and smiled. "Good. Now let me go return that board and we can do whatever you like," he stated as he rose and walked to the shoreline where the surfboard had been abandoned.

When he returned, Edward asked, "Are you ready to leave? Or do you want to hang out here a bit longer?"

I checked the time on my phone before answering. "Let's head back. I want to shower and change before we go for dinner."

He reached out his hands to help me up. "Okay, but wear something nice. I got a place in mind."

XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoX

A little while later, shortly before 8:00, I met Edward in the lobby of the hotel. He had offered to pick me up at my room but I insisted it wasn't necessary.

I was wearing my favourite blue cocktail dress that Alice had insisted I buy once upon a time. It was completely sleeveless and short, stopping at mid-thigh, with a small sweetheart neckline and a few random rhinestones splashed across the middle like a burst of stars. I wouldn't normally wear something so revealing but tonight was special – it was my last evening with Edward, possibly forever.

That thought made me sick to my stomach. Here was this wonderful, funny, kind, sensitive, caring, sexy man with a personality that complemented me in almost every way – and yet I couldn't have him. I'd realized for a while how _alive_ I felt around him, like I'd woken up from a long coma with the rest of my life ahead of me. Yes, I had feelings for Edward Cullen, but I couldn't be certain he reciprocated. And it would it matter if he did, considering our living circumstances?

_Maybe you have these feelings _because_ you can't have him_.

Sometimes I hated my inner monologue.

I battled with these thoughts and emotions during the elevator ride to the lobby as I tapped my silver heels impatiently.

When the doors opened and I finally got a look at Edward, I was absolutely spellbound. The man looked like sex in his swimming trunks, but in a grey wool suit he oozed manliness and charm. He flashed me that sexy crooked grin I'd come to adore and reached out as I approached him while eyeing my dress appreciatively.

"Wow, Bella! You look incredible," he gushed before giving me a light peck on the cheek. My skin tingled from the contact.

"Thanks," I replied timidly. "You look very debonair yourself."

His grin widened. "Yeah, I clean up nicely for a surfer dude. You ready?" He asked.

"Yup!" I replied enthusiastically. I noticed he didn't let go of my hand.

Edward led us outside the revolving doors of the hotel and waved over a taxi. He opened the door for me, helped me inside, then went around to the other passenger door.

"Valentino's please," he instructed the driver.

A few minutes later the cab pulled up in front of the restaurant. Edward paid the driver and helped me out of the cab as I tried to keep from flashing my panties to the whole world, a la Britney Spears. In this short dress it was exceedingly difficult. We walked into the restaurant and were seated by the hostess at a private booth.

"Wow, you sure know how to pick a restaurant," I admired.

Edward chuckled. "I'm a chef. I have some kind of food radar, or so my mother says."

"What does she do?" I asked when I realized Edward had told me very little about his family.

"She's an interior designer. Dad's a surgeon. They just moved to Montreal – it was their vow renewal I had to attend last week for their thirtieth wedding anniversary."

"Oh? Why did they move to Montreal?" I asked.

He picked up the menu and looked it over as he responded. "Dad was offered some fancy teaching position at McGill University Health Centre that he couldn't pass up. He'd been thinking about retiring from medicine anyway because of his arthritis. Not a good thing to have when you operate on people," he said before grinning at me.

I nodded. "So they're from Australia?"

He closed his menu and placed it on the edge of the table. "Actually I was born in Seattle. We moved down under when I was a baby so I don't remember it. Grew up in Brisbane. I did a business degree at Sunshine Coast University and kind stuck around there after I graduated and went to cooking school. I liked it better than Brissy."

"Brissy?" I asked.

He laughed. "Sorry, Brisbane. Australians use a lot of slang and sometimes forget that the rest of the world doesn't always get it."

Our waitress came and took our orders for dinner. Edward and I talked all through appetizers, entrees, and dessert, never missing a beat. It felt like we were old friends catching up after a long time apart, although the topics of conversation helped us get to know each other better. The more we talked and laughed, the more sick I felt about tomorrow's parting. I knew it was inevitable but I really didn't like it. I'd never felt this way around anyone else and, if I'm honest, I worried I never would again.

How this man, who I met three days ago, could captivate me so completely was a complete mystery. Each time he leaned over to wipe a piece of hair from my eyes, or poured me another glass of wine, or the way his green eyes twinkled as I spoke only made it worse. And when we finally left the restaurant holding hands I was certain my heart would fly out of my chest.

Of course I was a nervous wreck the entire cab ride back to the hotel, wondering if he would kiss me good night. It had certainly _felt_ like a date. Could I be hoping too much?

I was disappointed when Edward gave me a quick hug that lingered just a bit too long before he turned and nearly bolted down the hallway to the elevator.

I fell asleep that night more confused that I wanted to admit.

XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoX

The next morning I was up early to shower and pack my things. My flight was scheduled to depart LAX at 12:30PM. I planned to be there at least two hours early which meant waking up at 8:00AM to make sure I was good to go.

I tried not to cry as I folded my clothes and shoved them into my suitcase along with the few souvenirs I'd picked up along the way. It felt like I was leaving something behind even though I triple checked the room just to be certain.

Edward's flight to Honolulu wouldn't depart until midnight so he had plenty of time to kick around. I hadn't expected him to have his bags packed and ready to go when I hauled my luggage down to the car.

"Leaving so soon?" I joked.

He nodded and half smiled. "Yeah, no point in hanging around here. I'll grab a room somewhere near the airport and watch telly until my flight."

_Do his eyes look as sad as I feel?_

After everything was packed away, I hopped into the driver's seat of my little rental car and drove us to the depot. We hauled our luggage out of the trunk and Edward waited patiently as I handed over the keys to the clerk behind the rental desk. When I returned to him, he was shuffling awkwardly between his feet.

"Shall we grab a coffee?" He asked timidly.

I gave him the biggest smile I could muster. "Sure, but there's no timmies here. We'll have to settle for Starbucks or worse," I replied.

We walked over to the nearest coffee place and got in line. Edward avoided my eyes whenever I glanced his way but watched me when he thought I didn't notice. After we received our drinks, we went to sit by my departure gate. Checking my phone I noticed it was nearly boarding time.

"So…" Edward started.

I looked at him. "So," I mimicked before taking a huge gulp of my iced latte.

Edward took a deep breath before continuing. "I just wanna thank you. I had a great time these past few days. Definitely made this trek across the world worth it." He gave me a small smile that didn't reach his eyes.

"Even though it was in a big city?" I said, trying to throw some humour into this desolate situation.

He chuckled. "Yes, despite that. Next time we'll have to do something a bit more rustic."

I swear my heart stopped. "You want to see me again?"

His eyes snapped to mine and he ran his hand nervously through his hair. "This is so complicated," he mumbled.

I reached out and grabbed his free hand. "I know. Where do we go from here?"

He pulled his hand away and leaned forward to rest his elbows on his knees as he rested his forehead in his hands.

"We go to our separate homes in our respective countries. I'll go back to living a small town life and you'll keep on trying to change the world," he said sadly.

I reached out and touched his shoulder. "Edward, I…" I started before my voice caught in my throat. It was either start crying or stop talking. I opted for the latter.

He lifted his head up to look at me. "Bella, this is what has to happen. We barely know each other. I can't uproot myself for someone I just met, and I doubt you would do the same."

I couldn't stop the tears from falling. _Where was he the last few days?_

He got up from his chair and dropped to his knees in front of me, grabbing my mostly empty drink cup and tossing it aside. He held my hands and looked directly into my eyes.

"Before you go questioning yourself, _YES_ I absolutely felt it ever since we bumped into each other in the bookstore. But we knew this was going to happen," he said before wiping a tear from my cheek. "Don't cry. We'll keep in touch. I'll download Skype and we can video chat all the time. You won't be able to get rid of me so easily. We're mates for life now," he said quietly with a tentative smile.

Of course that was the moment they announced my flight was boarding. I inwardly cursed their timing, my tear-streaked face, and the impossible situation in front of me. We sat still for a few moments, allowing most of the passengers to board before I stood up and grabbed my carry-on. Edward rose to his feet and shuffled nervously.

"So…" I started.

"So," he replied.

I leaned in and gave him a huge hug. He reciprocated, wrapping his arms around me and rocking back and forth a little before pulling away.

"You got everything?" he asked, motioning toward my bag.

"Yep. Have a safe trip home, and let me know when you get there so I know you survived," I said in my sternest tone.

He let out a nervous laugh. "Okay, _MOM_."

I gave him a smile before saying, "Good-bye Edward."

_I hope to see you again. Sooner the better._

He nodded solemnly. "Good-bye for now, Bella Swan. Take care."

I forced myself to turn around and hand over my boarding pass to the flight attendant whose overly chipper voice made me cringe internally. Before walking through the door to the corridor that was connected to the plane, I looked back and found Edward staring at me. His face was contorted in a mask of sadness and regret. I had to quell the desperate urge to run back to him, instead forcing my legs to propel me forward. Every step I took from Edward was one step closer to having an anxiety attack.

As soon as I was in my seat I fished through my purse and pulled out my emergency bottle of Xanax. I downed two pills and let the tranquilizers lull me to sleep for the rest of the flight.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: This one is a bit shorter, but there's a reason for that: transition. It needed to happen this way. At least I think so.**

**Thank you to everyone who's favourited, followed, or dropped me a review. It makes my days happy and full of sunshine. :)**

*****Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight. I'm just doing her laundry.*****

* * *

"Come on Bella, it's been three days! I always have my photos up right away," Alice whined.

I frowned at her. "Dammit, I've been working late every single day to catch up and I haven't had a good night's sleep since getting home. Give me a break here."

"Yeah, but I wanna see how your trip was!"

"If you're so interested in my photos, then post them yourself!" I snapped and immediately felt bad. Alice was just being Alice and didn't deserve to be the brunt of my foul mood.

"Sorry Ali, I'm just tired."

That was the understatement of the year. Of course I was tired, having barely slept since leaving Edward at LAX. With the exception of my near coma on the flight I'd been tossing and turning every single night, haunted by nightmares. It didn't help that Edward hadn't added me to Facebook yet. Maybe I was being stubborn but I wanted him to initiate contact and as of yet there had been nothing.

"What's really wrong?" She asked me.

I sighed and flopped onto my couch dramatically. "Edward," was my only reply.

"You guys got awful close, huh?"

I nodded. "It's weird. We never went on official dates or kissed or anything, but I feel like I've just had a vacation romance that I never wanted to end. Is that ridiculous?"

_Of course it is. You barely know him._

"Not at all. When you have that connection with someone, it's just there. You can't help it. And considering your general lack of interest in dating, he must have been something really special. Am I right?" She said.

"You're always right. I just wish this time you were wrong," I whispered.

"I know. Give it time, things will work out how they're supposed to. Have faith in the universe."

After Alice left my condo for the evening, though not before posting my vacation photos to Facebook, I dragged myself over to my desk to stare at the face that haunted me. Before I could even click on the first picture I had a friend request. When I clicked on the button, it showed Edward Cullen was asking to be my friend. My heart started kickboxing in my chest as I accepted the request. Immediately I clicked on his name.

**_B: Took you long enough!  
E: Yeah I know. Sorry about that  
B: Did you get detoured to Timbuktu?  
E: That's a real place?  
B: Ha ha. Smartass  
E: Better than being a dumbass  
B: You wanna Skype for a bit? I miss seeing you…  
E: I'd love to but it's nearly time for me to go to work. I got a thousand orders while I was gone. Guess who gets to sift through everything and make all the callbacks?  
B: Don Cherry?  
E: Who?  
B: Wow. Just wow.  
E: I live in a bubble, remember?  
E: Hey I gotta run. Was nice talking. I'll check out the photos when I get home. c ya_**

That was our first conversation since the emotional parting at LAX. I wasn't sure what I'd expected, but it certainly wasn't that. He sounded cool and detached – not like the Edward who had been my friend, travel companion, and hangover buddy. Was three days enough time to completely forget about what we'd shared?

***Two Weeks Later***

"Sorry, got caught up in real life. There was so much to do when I got back that I haven't had time for anything but sleep and work. It's really stressful," he lamented.

I gave him my best evil glare. Or rather, I gave my webcam the evil glare. "I thought you'd forgotten about me."

He shook his head. "Of course not. I just work crazy hours, and this time difference thing is trickier than I thought. What time is it there?"

I glanced at my computer clock. "6:00AM. You?"

"About 8:00PM. Just got home from work. Somehow we were double booked for today so I had to call in everybody. It was nearly a complete disaster."

"But everything worked out right?" I replied.

He grinned. "Of course, I'm a professional. But how are things going up there in the frozen north?" He said, leaning back in his computer chair.

For a moment I debated what to say. I was upset that we hadn't connected in so long, but at the same time I believed him that it wasn't his fault. I decided to give him the benefit of the doubt.

"Same old. It's getting warmer out now, which is nice. I hate the winter."

He burst out laughing. "I thought Canadians were hearty and tough? Don't you play hockey and build igloos in the snow?"

I mock frowned at him. "Hardly. Most of us learn to deal with it, but by the time the ground thaws we're really sick of being frozen all the time. Winter is hard work – there's shoveling snow, wearing fifty layers to keep warm, salt stains on all your pants, and bad drivers. It gets really brutal sometimes," I retorted.

"I see," he said. "What about work? How's that?"

"It's okay. I got a new client this week. He's got severe Asperger's and is convinced he can get through law school. His parents sent him to us to help him plan some more realistic goals. I feel for the kid, ya know? He's smart and friendly, but his disability would definitely hold him back as a lawyer. It's a tough situation for him."

Edward nodded. "That's tricky. Are you okay?"

"Yeah I'm alright. After a while you learn to try to distance yourself from your clients, not completely of course, but I have to keep reminding myself I'm doing the best I can. This isn't one of my tougher cases. Those would send me home in tears."

He sat up straight in his chair. "Like what? What's a tough case?"

"When I can't do anything to help. Like one girl came in after her father died. He'd left a pile of debts and no assets. She was just barely eighteen, still in high school, and no other living relatives. She didn't qualify for any type of government assistance at all and there was absolutely nothing I could do for her except career counseling, which is ridiculous for her situation. I was tempted to push aside my vow of objectivity and cut her a person cheque," I replied, remembering the look of fear in that girl's eyes.

"I'm so sorry. That must have been really difficult," he said quietly with his best sympathetic tone. I appreciated the sentiment.

We didn't get to chat much longer as I had to start getting ready for work, but I did convince Edward that we should make a regular time to chat every week. I was excited when he conceded and promised to send him my work schedule so he could pick the best time for him.

***Three Weeks Later***

Edward and I sent a bunch of e-mails back and forth trying to sort out our conflicting schedules but nothing seemed to work. His schedule wasn't as regular or predictable as mine, thanks to the random hours of his catering clients, which made it impossible for us to connect in any meaningful way.

I grew increasingly frustrated at the situation. I thought about him all the time, reliving our adventures in Los Angeles and how happy we were together. It was painful to think about but it's all I really had. Sure we conversed through e-mail but it wasn't the same as sitting face to face. Most of his e-mails were short and focused on work while I made the effort to include a little bit about everything. In time I realized my letters sounded more like a personal blog than part of a conversation, which only frustrated me further.

***Two weeks Later***

"That's it. I give up. I know he's busy but he can't even put half an hour aside to chat with me? What the fuck!" I bitched to Alice one night as we sat at our usual table at Woody's. She rubbed comforting circles on my back.

"I know. That sucks a lot," she replied sympathetically.

"What should I do? I mean, we really bonded in LA. I thought there was something… special… about him. But now I feel like he's blowing me off. It's confusing." My mind flickered briefly to Allastair.

Rose snorted. "Men are all the same."

I wasn't in the mood for this. Not now. "Like women are so much better?" I rebuffed.

Rose's eyes went wide for a moment before they narrowed. "Point taken. Man or woman, you need to let them go when they act like spoiled children. You're better than that," she said as she nudged my shoulder with hers.

"But that's the thing, I don't _want_ to let him go. Even if we're only friends, he's become important to me," I whined pathetically.

Rose sighed in frustration. "Look, I'm not gonna sugar coat it. You've been nothing but depressing since you came back from LA. Sure, you have your moments when our little Bella is back, but overall I know you're moping. No matter what the reason, it's not a healthy thing to do. You're acting like some clingy girlfriend."

My eyes opened wide with shock. "I am?" I said as I looked at Alice.

She shrugged. "Maybe a little. But it's understandable," she said quietly.

That revelation really surprised me. I knew Edward wasn't my boyfriend. Hell I wasn't even certain he'd ever felt something more for me other than friendship. I thought about my behaviour over the past few weeks and realized I could easily seem stalkerish. There were countless e-mails and facebook messages begging to chat, attempted video calls on Skype, and way more messages from my end than from his.

I buried my face in my hands. "Oh God! He probably thinks I'm psychotic," I whined.

"I'm sure he doesn't think that. You're a passionate person, which I'm sure he gets," Alice said soothingly.

I shook my head, trying to hold back my tears. "He told me he felt our connection. He fucking _told_ me, right before I got on the plane. How could he put me in this position?" I cried as the tears escaped.

"Shhh, calm down. It'll be okay," Alice cooed in my ear as Rosalie got up from the table.

I cried for a few moments into my hands, not caring about the state of my mascara. How could I be so stupid? I should be put away somewhere without access to facebook or e-mail. I wonder what Edward could possibly think of me.

Rose returned to the table with a tray of shots. Before I could think about it too much, I dove right in and pounded back a few. I ordered some cocktails from the passing waitress and after downing them too got up to dance. I was absolutely determined to let loose for the evening and forget all about sexy Edward Cullen. _That_ nightmare I could face tomorrow.

XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoX

I woke up the next morning with a pounding hangover and my mouth feeling like dirty fuzzy socks. I groaned loudly before sitting up in bed to rub the sleep from my eyes. My hair wasn't cascading into my face which could only mean one thing: it was clinging to the top of my head. I groaned again at the prospect of untangling it.

I managed to force myself out of bed and into the kitchen to start a pot of coffee. I then got into the shower and allowed the hot water to wash away the last of my brain fog. Once I was out and dressed, I popped a couple of aspirin and headed back to the kitchen for a huge cup of morning java. As I sat down on the living room couch, I noticed my laptop was powered on and left open on the coffee table.

_What the hell did I do last night?_

I reached over and moved my finger over the track pad to get it out of hibernation and wished I never had. There in front of me was a very long chat window open between myself and Edward-freaking-Cullen. My face flushed with embarrassment as I contemplated what I could possibly have said – I couldn't remember a thing. I took a very long draw from my cup of coffee and pulled my laptop closer so I could read what I'd written.

**_B: EDWARRRRRRRRR wher re u?  
B: Ecqard Cuilenm! cime out an play!  
B: U hafv to talk 2 meee  
E: Hey Bella, what's up?  
B: Ther u r! Hi sexxy!  
E: LOL had a good night did we?  
B: Wud hav been grrrrreat but fuck  
E: Did something bad happen? Are you okay?  
B: Just spilt wster!_**

I looked down at the floor and saw a glass lying on its side. Okay, that explains that.

**_E: Oh, well, that's not a big deal. At least it's not juice.  
B: U woodnt carr if it was!  
E: Um, okay? What are you talking about?  
B: YPOU! U lied! Yu sed weed talk all thw time but noqw u avpoid me!~~!~!  
E: Bella…  
B: NO. I wanted u soooooooop basd  
E: We should talk about this when you're sober…  
B: NO I fucvkin hsate u!  
E: Bella, listen to me. Go to bed. I will be online at 5PM your time, and we'll hash this out, okay?  
B: finne. _**

I glanced at my wall clock and saw I still had two hours. That's 120 minutes to get my red face back to its normal pale skin tone, stop crying hysterically, and figure out how the hell to apologize without conceding defeat. I had no idea where to begin. I was completely overwhelmed.

What the hell was wrong with me? I met a man named Edward Cullen. Yes he was sexy and smart and kind, but he was just a man. I'd never lost my head over anyone before. Even when Amun was forced back to Egypt I managed to keep my cool. It was painful but not life altering. How was it possible that _this_ man, Edward Cullen, had me wrapped around his finger so tightly?

_If you don't let up he's going to show you exactly which finger._

I was so disgusted with myself. As I waited for him to come online, I re-read our correspondence over the past two months. He hadn't once discussed our time together. He was busy with work, looking forward to the cooler Australian winter, and asked me a lot of questions about what I was doing. He never made me any promises or relayed sweet endearments. If I didn't know we had a strong connection I would think we were barely acquaintances.

_But isn't that the truth? You hardly know him._ Have I mentioned I hate my inner monologue?

My computer beeping brought me out of my reverie. It was Edward calling me on Skype. I took a deep breath and accepted the call.

_Time for the big girl panties._

"Hey," he said nonchalantly as soon as our call connected.

"Hi," I replied, trying not to blush.

"How are you feeling today?"

Mission do-not-blush: failure. "I was pretty rough earlier but I'm better now. Coffee helps," I replied as I held up my now empty mug to the camera.

"I bet. You were pretty bad."

I sighed and rubbed my face. "About that… I'm really sorry for what I said. I was completely smashed. If it helps I didn't even remember we'd talked until I saw our conversation when I woke up," I offered.

He laughed boisterously. "Yeah that happens sometimes. It's allowed, I just hope you're okay."

_It's now or never…_

"Actually I'm not…" I said hesitantly.

He ran his hands through his hair nervously. "I know."

"You know why I had that psychotic episode last night?" I asked.

He leaned forward and rested his head on the desk. "Yes." Edward took a deep breath and sat up straight. "I owe you an apology. This has been very difficult for me too. I'm not good at this sort of thing, Bella."

I nodded in understanding, letting his words sink in. Though he wasn't saying anything substantial I heard the meaning of what he didn't say. He missed me too.

"I just need some time to wrap my head around all this. I wasn't expecting you," he practically whispered.

"I know exactly what you mean," I replied, my voice trembling with unshed tears.

"Let's just take this one day at a time for now. I've got a lot of crap coming up for work so it's likely I won't be available very often. But I'll do my best to send you a note whenever I get a free minute," he said with a small smile.

"Okay," I replied enthusiastically. It was all I could really ask at this point in time, and I was ecstatic he wasn't cutting me off for acting like a lunatic.

Being Edward Cullen's long distance pen pal was better than nothing at all, right?


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: I'm absolutely overwhelmed at how much support I've received! Thank you to everyone who's taken the time to read, favourite, and/or review. :)**

*****Stephenie Meyer owns twilight. I wish I could be her sidekick.*****

* * *

Three months after our quasi-heavy conversation as a result of my drunken stupidity, I was in a much better place – mentally speaking. I lowered my expectations and accepted the distance between me and Edward even if I still didn't like it. And I _really_ didn't like it at all.

There was still a huge part of me that missed him and longed for a bigger presence in my life, but with Alice's help I was able to see my situation with greater clarity. The best advice she ever gave me was to focus on the important things in my life and stop wallowing over what I couldn't change.

The more time passed the more clarity I gained over my situation – I realized I had been overcome with unfamiliar emotions and didn't know how to handle them. I still didn't know but at least I learned to control my impulses and limit my sadness to specific occasions – like when I saw a happy couple in love. It made me yearn for the possibility of one day finding that kind of bliss with Edward. Yes I still clung to the long term hope of eventually figuring things out. I just knew it would take a lot of time and effort to get there.

I recognized my attachment to him had been unhealthy at first; I'd been knocked out of my safety bubble and reacted like a child. I felt so ashamed about my behaviour and worked very hard to make amends. After all, it wasn't Edward's fault for my feelings. He'd always been very straight forward with me. And I was not so far gone that I couldn't recognize a long distance romance would only complicate our situation.

We e-mailed back and forth when there was something big to tell or when we needed advice, like the day I left my keys on the subway. If I came home from work in a foul mood I'd send him a quick message to vent my frustrations. When he had personnel issues he would ask me for my opinion. It was a simple relationship of give-and-take which seemed to work well for us. Our bi-weekly Skype chats were lighthearted and fulfilling. We never spoke about our feelings for one another though every now and then he would drop his façade for a split second. In those moments I knew, without a doubt, he felt it too. But I kept my comments to myself.

My newfound perspective didn't stop the need for an occasional tearful hug from either Rose or Alice. I usually ended up watching The Notebook during my hormonal days resulting in more tears. But other than those seldom moments I managed to keep myself together nicely and even enjoy my life. I started going out regularly, singing to myself in the shower, and putting in more volunteer hours at the humane society.

XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoX

The decision to re-prioritize my life is how I found myself in the VIP section of Whiskey Saigon for Alice's birthday party.

The Whiskey Saigon was a four-floor club that had been around for a long time in downtown Toronto. Each level had a different feel to it. The first floor had pool tables and grungy couches and played classic rock. The second floor had massive screens that spanned the entire wall where they would project the music videos of the retro songs they played. The third floor was a giant dance floor with colourful spotlights, blacklights, and shooter girls with luminescent boy shorts. This was where we were stationed, in a roped off platform overlooking the dance floor with our own private bartender.

Alice insisted we all wear matching dollar store sparkly top hats and an ungodly amount of glo-stick bracelets. Our group consisted of about thirty people, most of whom I had met briefly at some point or other over the past few years. She had even invited my co-worker Rachel and her husband Will, both of whom were trying my nerves.

"Bella! So good to see you outside of work for once," Rachel yelled over the boom-boom of the intense techno music.

I smiled and nodded. "You too!" I screamed back before downing another shot of tequila rose from a glowing test tube.

She sat down on the black leather couch next to me and yelled something incomprehensible.

"What was that?" I replied, leaning my ear toward her.

"I said, I invited my brother! He should be here soon!"

I didn't know how to take that. I knew Rachel wanted to set me up with her brother – she'd been trying for a long time. There was a reason I'd avoided seeing her outside of work. She was a really nice person but the pushiness was irritating. I mean, how decent could this guy be if he needed his sister to get him a date?

Thankfully Rose saw my annoyed expression and rushed over to me. She grabbed my hands and pulled me to the dance floor where we swayed our hips and strutted around like peacocks. I was grateful for her interference.

Rachel's meddling was soon as the back of my mind as Alice joined us on the dance floor, making me look like an awkward muppet next to her awesome grooves. But I didn't care – I felt carefree and happy dancing and drinking with my best girl friends. They were my true soul mates and I was grateful to have them in my life.

When Justin Timberlake's "Summer Love" came on, we all squealed like little girls and jumped up and down. A busty shooter girl came over with three shots of Ass & Titties which we downed faithfully before shaking our asses to the song. I tripped over my feet a few times, landing in Rose's arms, which spurred on a massive giggle fit from all three of us.

"Hold on, I gotta go the bathroom before I piss myself," I yelled at Rose. She grinned and nodded.

I turned from my friends and headed for the ladies' room as quickly as I could without falling on my face. I wasn't completely shitfaced but I sure had a nice buzz going on. Okay, a pretty heavy buzz. There was definitely alcohol in my bloodstream and it was making me feel confident and sexy, as ridiculous as that sounds.

After taking care of business, I stood at the sink and fluffed my hair – hanging in loose curls down my back – and reapplied my lip gloss. As soon as I was finished and had walked out of the bathroom I was assaulted by Rachel.

"Bella! Come with me," she said sternly as she grabbed me by the arm. She pulled me toward the VIP section practically thrusting me forward and into a broad chest.

"Ow! Rachel, what the hell?!" I yelled before looking up.

The man in front of me was tall and very handsome. He had shoulder length black hair that hung loosely, which framed a very tan face. He had high cheekbones, dark black eyes, and when he smiled his white teeth almost glowed under the blacklight.

"Hi there," he said as I stood dumbfounded.

Rachel elbowed me in the ribs causing me to jump. "Bella, this is my brother Jake. Jake, this is Bella. We work together at the centre." She grinned at me.

I cleared my throat and backed away from Jake, extending my hand in greeting. "Nice to meet you," I said. He shook my hand in return.

"The pleasure is all mine," he replied before lowering his head to my ear. "You wanna go upstairs for some fresh air? We can get the monkey off our backs if she thinks we're hitting it off."

I covered my mouth and giggled as I nodded my consent.

Jake grabbed my hand and led me through the crowd to the stairs that led to the fourth floor of the club which was a roof top patio. Despite the fact that he held my hand through the trek I never felt awkward. Something about him told me this was an innocent gesture. Though I'd known him for a matter of minutes he radiated kindness and generosity, so I wasn't afraid follow him.

He led me to a table by the railing. I sat down and smiled as his eyes gave me a quick once over.

"Would you like a drink?" He asked.

"Um, just a bottle of water for now. Thanks," I replied.

When he returned with my water and a Coors Light, Jake sat down opposite me and took a long swig. I found myself watching him closely – he really was a good looking guy. He wore a tight black t-shirt that stretched across his beefy chest and a simple gold chain around his neck. His forearms were thick and manly, and his biceps bulged as he put his drink back down on the table.

"So Bella, Rachel tells me you work at the centre?" He asked.

I nodded. "Yes, I'm one of the registered social workers. I do mostly employment counseling. Rachel's the big boss's personal assistant so we don't chat very often. But she's always been nice to me."

_Except when she's interfering in my love life._

He smirked. "Yeah she's a great kid, but she can be pushy. She's been bugging me to come out and meet you for a long time now."

I laughed out loud. "Same here. I wonder why she chose me? I'm not the only single girl at the office," I mused.

He shrugged his gigantic shoulders. "I dunno, but I'm sure glad she did," he said with a wink that made my cheeks flush.

I decided to deflect the attention away from me. "So what do you do?"

He smiled knowingly. Damn, he saw right through me! "I'm a mechanical engineer. I help design parts for car engines."

"Wow, seriously?" I was totally taken aback.

He nodded and smiled. "Yup! It's something I've always wanted to do since I was a little kid. I used to spend all my free time in my dad's garage taking things apart and putting them back together. Dad always said I was a born grease monkey but I got frustrated at being limited by what was available. I wanted to make things work better. So I went off to University of Windsor and got myself certified to do it my way."

"Why Windsor?"

He smiled. "They have one of the best automotive mechanical engineering programs around," he replied as he flashed me the iron ring on his pinky finger. He wiggled it playfully before grabbing his bottle of beer and taking another huge gulp.

I watched as he swallowed the liquid, his adam's apple bobbing up and down. Jake was cute… really cute. Hot even. There was something enticing about him that I couldn't pinpoint. Maybe it was his large hands or the way his eyes followed me? I wasn't sure. But I did know I found him very attractive and wanted to know him better.

"So you're an engineer who likes cars. What do you do for fun?" I asked.

His smile turned to a grin. "Oh you know, the usual. Hang out with my buddies at the bar, road trips, playing guitar. I like to read sometimes too but I don't get a lot of time for that. Work's pretty crazy."

"Oh? What do you read?"

"Mostly Stephen King or James Patterson. And if I'm feeling bold I'll pull out Michael Crichton," he said as he wiggled his eyebrows, causing me to laugh and spit out my water all over him. He blinked and wiped his face off with a playful smirk.

"I had a shower before I came, but I suppose a second one couldn't hurt."

My face turned beet red as I tried to wipe his arms with a napkin. "I'm so sorry! I must be more drunk than I thought," I gushed. Suddenly his massive hands wrapped around mine.

"Bella, don't worry about it. I'm not hurt and it's only water. Speaking of which, do you want something stronger?" He asked, gesturing toward the bar.

"Trying to get me plastered?" I said with a mocking tone.

He grinned at me. "If I was doing that I would have spiked your water."

We grabbed more drinks – Jake got another beer while I opted for something fruity and girlie – and went back downstairs. The party was still in full swing as if we hadn't missed anything. Jake motioned toward the dance floor and I nodded in agreement. We dodged around people until we came to the centre of the dance floor where Jake turned back toward me and started dancing.

I almost laughed – he was as bad as me, pulling out some seriously retro moves with crazy arms and gyrating hips. I nearly dropped my drink more than once as people bumped into me, but it was worth keeping a small distance from Jake so I could watch him dance. Silly or not, he was definitely eye candy. I swear I started drooling when he turned around and shook his toned, firm butt at me. After that it was game on as I pulled out my worst dance moves. We laughed heartily at ourselves as we dominated the upscale techno room with something akin to muppets having seizures.

We barely noticed when the music stopped entirely, causing loud protests from the dance floor.

I looked up at the DJ and saw Jasper with a microphone in his hand.

"Good evening everyone, thanks for coming out to Alice's birthday. I'll make this quick I swear," he said before covering the mic and coughing nervously. "Ali, we've been together for fourteen years. Ever since I saw you I knew you were the one for me. Today, on your 28th birthday, after having been together for exactly half of your life, I hope you'll do me the honour of agreeing to be my wife."

A chorus of 'awwwwwww' could be heard throughout the crowd. I don't know where she was or how she got there, but within seconds Alice was in Jasper's arms with her legs wrapped around his waist kissing him passionately. Everyone in the room thundered their applause including Jake and I. In that moment of pure love I was so happy for my best friend – I knew she'd been expecting this soon. But for a brief microsecond my mind flashed to Edward and I couldn't stop the sadness from boiling up to the surface.

When the music started playing again, a really bad techno remix of "It's Raining Men," I beelined for the bathroom and locked myself in the far stall.

I didn't cry, yell, or throw a tantrum. I simply sat on the toilet with my head resting on the wall beside me, thinking about how ridiculous it was for me to be upset at all. Edward never made any promises or led me on. I knew what was involved. But my heart wouldn't listen to my brain and soon I realized I'd been sitting there for more than twenty minutes.

I left the bathroom and found Alice to congratulate her. She was over the moon like someone had injected her with pure adrenaline. We hugged for a minute before I told her I was really wasted and needed to get to bed. She nodded, pecked me on the cheek, and slapped my butt playfully before I walked toward the stairs and out the building. I caught a cab back to my condo.

I wasn't that drunk anymore but I was a sweaty disgusting mess. My hair was frizzy, eye liner smudged, and my clothes stuck to my body like a clammy second skin. I knew I needed a shower but my bed was too inviting. I stripped out of my clothes and sprawled out on top of my comforter, falling asleep very quickly with images of green eyes and board shorts dancing across my mind's eye.

XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoX

I woke up to the sound of my cellphone ringing loudly from the pocket of the pants I'd left on the ground beside my bed. I groaned, leaned over and fished it out. I opened it before checking the caller ID.

"Hello?" I grumbled.

"Um, hey, is this Bella?" A deep voice resonated.

"Yes. Who's this?"

"Oh! Hey, it's Jake. Sorry if I woke you, I can call back later…" he sounded unsure.

I looked at my alarm clock. It read 1:34PM.

"No it's okay, I really should be getting up anyway. How are you?" I replied as I sat up. Realizing I was naked, I walked to my closet and grabbed my housecoat for cover.

"Good, really good. Look if this is a bad time, it's really no problem to talk to you later," he offered.

I smiled. "That's very thoughtful, but it's okay. Like I said I have to get up anyway. Can't waste the day away in bed," I said before my brain-to-mouth filter kicked in.

He chuckled. "Well, I'm gonna have to disagree with you there. I happen to know of certain times when it's much more fun to stay in bed," he said huskily.

I shivered as images of Jake's naked form on top of me in the throes of passion invaded my head.

"You're right," I agreed. "Hey, sorry for leaving so quickly last night. I all of a sudden felt pretty sick and just needed to get home."

"It's okay, I've been there. I was just sad at having to get your number from Alice instead of you. That woman is feisty," he said. I could hear the grin in his voice.

I chuckled. "Yes, she can be a firecracker." Then it hit me. "Oh God, you asked _Alice_? That means the Spanish inquisition will be harassing me soon."

"She's that bad huh?"

I groaned. "You have no idea. She won't rest until she has every single detail," I lamented.

"What will you say?"

I smirked. "Oh, just that I met some guy who hit on me all night relentlessly. And he's kinda cute in a lost puppy sort of way."

"And that you're meeting him tonight for dinner?"

I gasped. "You're asking me out?"

He laughed loudly. "Yes, I believe that's what they call it. So… whaddya say?"

I pretended to think for a moment before replying, "Sounds good. Il Fornello at 8?"

"I'll be there."

"I'm glad to hear you say that, because our pixie friend is on the other line. I'll see you later!"

I hung up with Jake and accepted the call from Alice who, as usual, had a million questions about last night. I gave her the shortest answers she would accept before conceding to meet for lunch the following day to start planning her wedding. Yes, she and Jasper had already picked a date though they'd been engaged all of twelve hours.

XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoX

I arrived at my favourite restaurant at 7:45 exactly. The hostess told me Jake had not yet arrived but seated me at a small table by the large front windows facing onto the busy street. I ordered a glass of red wine and waited patiently by myself.

I stared out the window, watching the bustle of the city passing by. It was busy for a Sunday evening. Lots of cars, bikes, and people hurrying along the street trying to maneuver on the small sidewalk. A streetcar rumbled by, full of passengers, as a dirty man in torn clothing yelled at it. A gay couple sauntered lazily, holding hands, with a tiny fluffy Pomeranian leading the way. A man in a business suit carrying a briefcase tried to get around them as he half ran down the sidewalk toward the subway entrance.

Then I spotted Jake making his way around two teens smoking cigarettes outside the convenience store across the street. He was wearing dark wash jeans with a long sleeve vee neck red shirt with a black blazer overtop. As he reached the door to the restaurant I could tell his hair was neatly brushed into a careful ponytail and he was freshly shaven. He spotted me and grinned his charming smile, and I was once again struck by the whiteness of his teeth against his russet coloured skin. Within a minute he was removing his jacket and sat down across from me.

"You look great," I said as I tried to be subtle about eyeing his thick, muscular arms.

"Thanks," he replied. "So do you."

I blushed and offered my thanks. I'd opted for a simple tunic top in silk with Asian flowers plastered all over it, and a black pair of tights with a low heel. My hair was long and straight, and my makeup was simple.

"I haven't been here before. What's good?" Jake said as he glanced at the menu.

I pointed toward the massive pizza oven at one side of the room. "They do amazing gourmet pizza with anything you want on it. It's one of a kind."

He smiled and folded his menu. "Then it's decided. Wanna split one with me?"

I smiled back. "Love to. But you should know my taste in pizza is unusual," I warned playfully.

He quirked one eyebrow at me. "Try me. I can take it."

The waitress soon arrived and took our order. I made Jake plug his ears as I told her what kind of pizza we wanted. He thankfully obliged me without putting up a fuss. When she was gone, I motioned to Jake that it was safe.

"You got me kinda nervous you know," he said with a grin.

"Is that because of dinner, or some other reason?" I rebuffed. Flirty Bella was obviously coming out to play.

"Well… while I do enjoy the subtle view down your top, I'm not known to be too adventurous when it comes to food. I'll try anything once, but my palate tends to want simple things."

"Does that apply only to food?" I asked with a sly grin.

He leaned back in his chair and folded his arms across his huge chest. "Absolutely. In every other way I like the opposite of simple," he returned with a smirk.

"That's good to know. I like a man who can appreciate a little complexity."

He shrugged his massive shoulders. "Life gets boring when you don't have some variety. That's why I take my vacation time very seriously."

I laughed. "I haven't had a real vacation in such a long time."

"Really? I thought you were in Los Angeles recently."

Los Angeles. Edward. Surfing. The Notebook. Dinner.

I coughed and took a sip of wine before speaking again. "Yes, but that was, um… a business trip. For work. A conference thingy I had to go to," I spluttered.

Jake nodded. "Yeah, that's not a real vacation. Hey are you okay? You look a little pale…"

I waved my hand dismissively. "I'm fine. Just got something stuck in my throat. So where have you visited?" I said, trying to change the subject. Thankfully it worked.

"Well my family was pretty poor growing up, so most of my travels have been these past ten years or so. The summer after I finished university I backpacked around Europe for a bit. My first vacation from work I went to Cuba. Second vacation to Egypt. I saved up some money and last year spent two weeks in Tanzania, which was amazing," he said.

"Wow, that's incredible," I replied.

He smiled. "Yup. Next on my radar is Australia. I've always wanted to try surfing."  
I was completely grateful that our food arrived at just that moment so I wouldn't have to explain why my heart was racing and my palms sweating. I liked Jake – he was friendly, kind, smart, and very good looking. I didn't want to have to discuss anything related to Los Angeles, Australia, or a certain green eyed 'friend' of mine. Something told me to leave that line of conversation alone.

I couldn't help but laugh as Jake stared at our pizza with a quizzical expression.

"It's garlic, banana peppers, kale, and prosciutto. Very tasty," I said as I grabbed a couple of slices and put them on my plate eagerly.

"Damn woman, whatever happened to pepperoni and mushrooms?" He said as he tentatively helped himself.

"Hey, this is divine. Give it a taste. If you don't like it I'll pick off all the ingredients for you," I teased.

His eyes opened wide. "You'd do that? For me?"

I nodded and laughed. "Of course."

And so our dinner continued. We chatted about our lives and our friends, shared some past experiences, and flirted a lot. At one point I wiped sauce off Jake's chin and blushed furiously when he winked at me afterward. He made every effort to seem casual about touching my arm or hand during our conversation, but by the way he searched my eyes for acceptance I could tell he was nervous. After a couple more glasses of wine for me, and a few beers for Jake, the conversation got more personal.

"So Bella, I know you're a social worker, you're adventurous, you own a condo, and you're absolutely gorgeous. Why are you single?" Jake asked. I could see no judgement in his eyes or hear condescension in his voice – I knew it was an honest question.

"In my experience most men aren't worth it. I figure unless someone really puts in the effort to 'wow' me, I won't bother. Not many of them catch my eye anyway." My mind briefly flickered to Edward.

"But I didn't do anything special, I just asked. Why did you agree to go out with me tonight?"

I smiled at him. "I like you. I wanted to see if my first impression was right, and it was."

He nodded knowingly. "It's rare to find someone you click with. I've had so many blind dates, thanks to my meddlesome sister, and most of them turned out terrible. I swore I wouldn't do it again," he said before chuckling. "Guess she got it right this time."

I reached out and grabbed his hand. "I think she did."

After paying for our meal and exiting the restaurant, Jake offered to walk me home. We worked off some of the evening's calories as we walked along, our arms linked, talking about Toronto and pointing out different things we passed. It was a lot of fun and I was hyper aware of the bulky muscles beneath my fingers. The walk back to my apartment was long but very worth it.

As we reached the lobby of my building, Jake turned to me and placed his hands on my shoulders, causing my blood pressure to rise with anticipation.

"I'd like to see you again. Can I call you this week?" He asked.

I nodded and grinned like an idiot. "I'd really like that. Thank you for a wonderful evening."

He smiled back. "Thanks for giving me a chance. Next time let's do something less formal, okay?"

"Okay, sounds good."

Jake leaned down and placed a feather light kiss on my lips, our skin barely touching. His lips moved slowly and carefully against mine. My girly bits were on fire despite the sweetness of the moment. I had to restrain myself from jumping up and wrapping my legs around his toned midsection. I almost whimpered when he pulled back.

"Good night, beautiful. Talk to you soon."

I could only nod dumbly as I watched him pull back and turn around to exit the lobby. I watched his very fine ass dance as he walked, and felt myself blush when he turned around and caught me ogling him. He gave me one last wave before rounding the corner and out of my sight.

I grinned stupidly as I made my way up to my condo.


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Thank you for all the support! I am completely honoured. :)**

**Just as an FYI... this ****_is_**** a ExB HEA story. They will end up together, but what's a good story without some conflict? If this wasn't a build up then it wouldn't be very interesting. Have faith my friends, we will get there eventually.**

*****Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight. I'm just borrowing a cup of sugar.*****

* * *

I spent the next few days after my date debating whether or not I should tell Edward about it. I even asked for Alice's advice at our lunch date on Monday but never got much of a response. She was too interested in wedding planning to give me a real answer.

Rationally I knew it was silly not to tell him. I mean, we weren't dating or planning our future together. He lived in his bubble on the opposite side of the globe. Sure there were still feelings between us, or at least on my side. I couldn't deny that when my heart rate spiked every time I received an e-mail or when we Skyped together. But some part of my brain screamed to keep it to myself for now, and I couldn't ignore it.

And so the time passed as it always did. I went to work, met with clients, volunteered, and went for drinks every Saturday night with the girls. I paid my bills on time and chatted with Edward regularly. The only differences came in the form of Jacob Black and planning Alice's wedding. The former was a welcome insertion while the latter was a source of ire – my little pixie friend sure knew how to test my patience.

Three Months Later…

"I've had exactly six dates with Jake and we _still_ haven't gone past kissing. What gives?" I complained one Saturday night over drinks at Woody's.

Rose snorted. "Beats me. Guys usually don't have that kind of restraint. Maybe he's gay?"

"I don't think so. If he was, he wouldn't get excited when we kiss would he?" I asked. I was emboldened by the strong wine coolers flowing through my bloodstream.

Alice piped up. "I've seen the way he looks at Bella, and I can tell you he most certainly is _not_ gay," she barked at Rose, who 'humphed' and flipped her hair over her shoulder in dismissal.

"I hope not," I mumbled before taking another huge gulp of my fruity drink.

Alice laughed. "Oh, I never thought I'd see the day! Our little Belly's in looooove!"

I playfully smacked her arm. "Am not!"

Rose grinned. "You're blushing Bella! I think Alice is onto something here."

I tried to hide my inflamed face. "Guys, seriously. NOT. IN. LOVE. I'm enjoying my time with him but it's not that serious."

"Yet," Alice and Rose added at the same time.

I shook my head. "I don't know if we'll get there or not. For the first time ever I'm just trying to go one day at a time. I like Jake a lot and I don't want to ruin it…" I trailed off, thinking of Edward.

As if she could read my mind, Alice asked, "Have you told Edward?"

I sighed and shook my head. "No but I should. I feel really awful that I've been keeping it from him. It's just weird."

"Weird how?" Rose asked. I detected a note of sympathy in her voice that surprised me. I knew she wasn't a cold hearted bitch like she appeared, but normally she wouldn't let me talk about Edward for any length of time. She said I wallowed in self-pity too much when it came to him.

"Well, I still have feelings for him." Rose rolled her eyes as I continued. "But I'm dating Jake now, who I really like. I feel like I'm not being fair to either of them, but I'm sort of stuck in the middle. I'm just not sure how to handle things, that's all."

Alice patted my arm. "You need to talk to them both. What's the worst that could happen?"

I laughed nervously. "WELL, either of them could tell me to fuck off and call me an ungrateful bitch for getting them involved with someone who's not totally available."

Rose gave me a stern glare. "Bella, listen to me. You _are_ available. You are _not_ with Edward. You're not promising to marry Jacob Black, so there's nothing to explain. I mean, you haven't even had 'the talk' yet about being exclusive, have you?"

I felt my shoulders sag. "You're right. But I know that conversation is coming soon and I'm nervous about it. Shouldn't I only have feelings for him if we're dating exclusively?"

Alice jumped in. "Do you have cybersex with Edward?"

"WHAT?" I yelled. I couldn't believe the impertinence of this tiny, annoying best friend of mine.

She rolled her eyes. "Oh relax. If you're not having cybersex or professing your love for one another, then you're not doing anything wrong when it comes to Jake. So quit worrying and get back to one-day-at-a-time Bella. I like her better."

Rose chuckled. "So do I. Quit putting up barriers and enjoy the attention. You deserve it."

I had to stop and gawk openly at Rose. Was that what I was doing? Putting up barriers? Giving myself reasons to _not_ get heavily involved with Jake? No, it couldn't be. If that were true wouldn't I have told Edward about Jake?

But the truth is I had no idea how Edward would react. Part of me hoped it would show him the light so to speak and make him declare his feelings for me. That's hopeful romantic Bella for you. The realist in me kept saying it wouldn't have any effect on him at all – this thought hurt like hell. If he didn't react then it would only confirm he didn't think of me as more than a long distance pen pal and I don't think I could deal with that bombshell. So really it was a lose-lose situation for me.

XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoX

Sure enough, the next time I saw Jake was a rather intense conversation. He'd come over to my condo for dinner and a movie – I'd been promising him a Mexican night for a few weeks and finally we both had enough free time to make it happen.

I grilled the steak slices with peppers and onions in a Cajun spice and set it out with tortillas, salsa, grated cheese, sour cream, jalapenos, and tomatoes. Everything was carefully placed on my kitchen table in a help-yourself arrangement. I had just assembled a burrito and was about to take a bite when Jake spoke up.

"So, I think we should talk," he said carefully.

"Go ahead," I replied before taking a huge bite of my burrito. I was really hungry.

He coughed nervously. "Well, I wanted to ask what you think about us."

I felt my eyes open wide with fear. Was he breaking up with me? If so, he has lousy timing.

"No no, it's not that. Shit I'm bad with this kinda stuff," he mumbled before rubbing his forehead.

I put down the rest of my burrito and looked him in the eye. "What are you trying to say?"

He sighed. "What I'm trying to say, very poorly, is that I want to date you. Only you. Just us, nobody else."

I nodded and smiled. "I'd like that too, Jake. But I have to ask… is this why we haven't, well, you know…"

"Had sex?" He finished with a grin. I blushed and nodded. "It's because I care about you. I didn't want to jump in too fast and scare you off. I've done that before and I really didn't wanna screw this up. Make sense?"

"Yeah it does. I was just wondering…" I said and shrugged, trying to act nonchalant as I stared at my burrito.

He reached over and lifted my chin with his index finger. "Hey now, why the long face?"

I grimaced at my expressive face. "I was kind of worried. That you… you know, didn't want…"

"NO. Believe me, that is absolutely _not_ the case. Do you know how irresistible you are? God, it's taken all my effort not to throw you over my shoulder and march you to the bedroom every time I'm standing next to you. Bella you are gorgeous, sweet, funny, smart, and sexy as hell. I'd be an idiot not to notice."

My pout turned into a grin. "Okay then. Can we eat now? I'm starving," I said as I stared longingly at my now cold, half-eaten burrito.

He threw his head back with laughter, flashing me his perfect white teeth. "Of course."

Following our very filling meal, we cuddled up together on the couch with glasses of wine watching The Mexican with Brad Pitt and Julia Roberts. It really was a Mexican themed night.

I think we managed to get about a third of the way through it before Jake started running one finger up and down my arm, creating delicious goosebumps in its wake. I shivered involuntarily which only encouraged him to continue.

If I'm honest with myself I didn't want him to stop. Sure there was a huge part of me still attached to Edward that yearned for his touch. But I'm human, dammit, and Jake was _hot_. But he was also more than that – he was a really good man and I knew he cared about me. Not just my body, but _me_ as a person. I'd have to be completely stupid to give up the possibility of exploring a relationship with Jake over someone on the other side of the planet. Especially when that someone may or may not have feelings for me. And even if he did have feelings, it's not like we could do anything about it. At least, not right now.

And so that night I succumbed to more immediate desires and gave myself physically to Jake. His muscled body was even more impressive without clothes – the sight of his butt alone made me drool. I had to stop myself from biting the delicious apples that comprised his ass cheeks.

It was a long night of fulfilling each other's needs in the most intimate ways. Jake had very skilled hands and his plump lips were excellent for kissing. And the way he took me roughly again and again brought me to heights I hadn't experienced in a long time. When we finally passed out in my bed, I felt fully sated physically.

My only complaint was the lack of emotional connection between us. Sure there was passion, need, and desire, but I something was definitely lacking. It was great sex but it didn't totally blow my mind, which both saddened and relieved me in different ways. It was then I knew without a doubt that Jake could never be the love of my life.

XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoX

The next day I lay in bed after Jake left for a work emergency, staring at my ceiling, wondering how I'd gotten to this point in my life. My birthday was coming up in a couple of weeks – the big two eight. It was weighing on my mind as I contemplated my life.

I owned my own condo which, though small, was beautiful. I had a successful and rewarding career, a loving if frequently absent mother, great friends, and perfect health. Now I had a boyfriend to add to that list. And yet… something was missing. I felt a rush of guilt – how could I possibly complain when millions of people were way worse off than I was?

I decided to roll out of bed and start my morning routine. Although it was Friday I wasn't scheduled to see any clients until after noon so I was able to take my time. I started a pot of coffee, powered up my laptop, and hopped into the shower. As soon as I turned off the water I heard the telltale bell ringing which signaled a call from Skype. I wrapped a towel around myself and ran to the living room.

Edward.

Without thinking I clicked accept and sat down on my couch nervously. With a few seconds our call connected and there was Edward in all his bronze haired beauty staring at me with a cheeky grin.

"Hey beautiful. I see you dressed up for me," he said with a chuckle.

I looked down and instantly my cheeks flushed. "Oh shit! I just got out of the shower."

He laughed harder. "Now that's something I'd like to see. Feel free to get back in, but make sure you take the computer to the bathroom with you."

My red cheeks turned crimson as I tried to hide my face with my hair. "Give me a minute to put some clothes on. I'll be right back." I got up and ran to my bedroom before he could respond.

_Stupid, stupid, stupid._

When I got back I unplugged my laptop and took it to the kitchen with me so I could make some breakfast while chatting with Edward.

"So how are things down under? Isn't it a bit late for you to be up?" I asked as I poured a cup of coffee.

"Yeah but I saw you online so figured we could catch up a bit. It's been a while."

I glanced at the screen and saw the sadness on his face. "Is everything okay?" I asked.

He hesitated before answering. "Yeah I guess. I've just been stressed out with work. We've got a few weddings coming up which are always stressful. Seems like everyone in Australia wants to get married at the same bloody time."

It was my turn to laugh. "Have fun with bridezillas. I swear I'm going to kill Alice one of these days. Do you know she changed her colour scheme _again_?" I rolled my eyes dramatically as I reached into the fridge for a bagel.

"When is the wedding?" He asked.

I pulled out the cream cheese and started spreading it on my bagel. "The colours aren't the only thing that changes. She keeps flip flopping between wanting a winter wedding and being outdoors in the summer," I said as I shook my head. "It's really annoying. How am I supposed to plan for time off work if she doesn't start getting her shit together? Damn annoying little pixie," I grumbled.

Edward laughed. "Thankfully I'm not around for those types of decisions. I just have to deal with food. Not sure I could handle anything else. But weddings are good for business, most of them pay really well and it's a good opportunity to do some networking."

I took a bite of my bagel and realized that Edward was watching me curiously. I also noted the sad expression on his face hadn't changed. I swallowed my bite of gooey cheesy bready goodness and asked him to tell me what was wrong.

He sighed and ran his hands through his hair nervously. "Well, I was hoping you'd bring it up first..."

"Edward, what is it?" I asked in my most soothing voice.

He cleared his throat. "Um, well, how long have you been seeing someone? You never mentioned it," he practically whispered.

My heart beat furiously in my chest. How the hell did he find out? This was _not_ a conversation I wanted to have without some major advance planning, and I wanted to tell him myself. I felt anxiety and dread form in my stomach like lead weights, turning my appetite into nausea and my skin into a blazing inferno. I was going to maim whoever was responsible for this.

"How did you find out?" I asked.

He smiled sadly. "So it's true. Your facebook relationship status changed this morning. I thought maybe it was a mistake, but I guess not."

_What the fuck?_

I opened up my web browser and logged into my facebook account. Sure enough there was a request from Jake to change our relationship status. I growled and rubbed my face nervously.

"I was planning to tell you, I just…"

"It's okay, Bella. I expected this would happen sooner or later. You don't owe me any explanation. I just wish you could have talked to me about it before now. We're friends, you can tell me anything," he said with a halfhearted smile.

"It's nothing serious. He's a good guy and we get along really well, but it's still really early and I'm not holding out any grand expectations or anything," I said. I seemed to be trying to convince myself more than him.

Edward nodded. "What's his name? What does he do? Does he… treat you well?" His voice wavered on that last question. It filled me with sadness and longing – I wanted to take it back, to tell Edward he was the one for me and Jake meant nothing. I wanted to cry and scream and hop a plane to Australia so we could make everything better. Instead I took a deep breath and answered his questions.

"Jacob Black. He's a mechanical engineer, and yes he's always been very good to me. He's very kind and thoughtful," I added for good measure.

I heard Edward inhale deeply as he closed his eyes. "Do you love him?" he asked without opening his eyes. I could feel the heartache emanating from him, even through our two computers.

"No," I blurted out. "I mean, it's too early for that kind of thing. I'm trying to take it one day at a time."

He nodded as he exhaled in relief. "Okay," he said with a small smile. "Hey I gotta run for now, I'm exhausted. Can we talk again soon?"

"Of course. Just let me know," I replied eagerly.

"Kay. Good night beautiful. I'll message you soon."

I smiled. "Good night Edward. Sweet dreams."

He smiled back. "Always," he whispered before disconnecting our call.

EPOV

When Bella told me to have sweet dreams, she had no idea that I always did – because she was in them. Over the last six months she had starred in most of the dreams I could actually remember when I woke up. At first they had confused me – sure I knew there was an attraction between us but I had no idea how deeply it ran until I saw that change in her facebook status.

She still didn't know our first encounter had not been an accident. I had seen her in the airport bookstore and watched her for a few minutes. Because I've never been very smooth I decided to fake bumping into her, not realizing how clumsy she could be. I just had to talk to her. As soon as I'd spotted her I felt something shift inside me. There was this pull, like an invisible cord, and I knew I'd never forgive myself if I let it slip by. When I found out we were taking the same flight I was ecstatic. I had the idea of extending my trip in Los Angeles before we even boarded the plane.

It wasn't just her natural beauty that drew me in, although she was absolutely breathtaking. It was the way she chewed on her lower lip when she was deep in thought, or played with her hair when she was nervous, or the way she looked at me like I was the only man on the planet. I felt my loosening grip on reality every time I stared into her deep chocolate coloured eyes. She mesmerized me as if she was made for me alone.

Although I wanted nothing more than to claim her as mine, I knew it wouldn't be fair to either of us. I swear I had the restraint of a priest when we were in LA. More than once I caught myself reaching out to stroke her long, beautiful hair but I quickly pulled back before she could notice. Everything about her enticed me, drew me in, like a siren singing a love song for only my ears. I wanted her so bad in every possible way.

These feelings both frightened and elated me. Even with Kate I'd never felt this consumed by another person, and I thought I'd been in love with her. Never had I believed in the possibility of _everything_ all rolled into one petite package. Bella Swan was my match in every possible way and I felt like half a man without her.

I knew she felt similarly for me. Her expressive brown eyes and telltale blush told me my feelings weren't one sided. With each innocent touch, furtive glance, or suggestive comment I knew. I could read her like a teenage boy with his comic books. The words were never spoken but they weren't necessary. It broke my heart to leave her in LAX, especially after telling her we had to be realistic. My brain screamed at me to gather her in my arms and never let go. I yearned to kiss her and make everything better. But the realist in me knew these things would only hurt us both, and I couldn't do that to her. She was too special to leave heartbroken.

I thought it would make things easier if I could just let her go. I tried for a few days after returning home to forget what I was missing. I slept a lot and cleaned my house a few times from top to bottom – anything to keep me from pining over Bella Swan. When that failed miserably I crumbled and found her on facebook, only to have to break her heart again and again.

And just when I thought we'd both found some peace, she has to go find a boyfriend. I would have never guessed that one little thing could rouse such an intense emotional reaction. I, Edward Anthony Cullen, cried over the thought of Bella Swan with another man. I didn't even cry when Kate died.

I vowed to be her friend no matter the situation. I wanted her to share everything with me. And so I listened as she talked about Jacob Black though the bile circled dangerously in my stomach.

And now that I know my perfect match is with someone else, I only have one thought in my head: _You did this to yourself_.

I know I did. And I really, truly hate myself for it.


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: So there's a little drama in this chapter but not too bad I hope. Also some surprises and some hope for the future!**

**Thanks again to everyone who's made it this far. I appreciate each of you!**

*****Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight. I'm just babysitting her dogs.*****

* * *

BPOV

With our relationship being facebook official, I couldn't hide Jake from my nosey mother. When she called me up and squealed like a pot belly pig I knew a family dinner was in my near future. Jake and I made our way to Renee and Phil's home in Rosedale two weeks after our relationship became public.

She greeted us both with enthusiastic hugs while Phil did his usual shy handshaking. We were ushered into the lounge – usually reserved for very special guests – for cocktails before dinner was finished. Renee had hired a cook for the evening so she freely could grill Jake with endless stupid questions.

"So, Bella tells me you design cars," she started. I rolled my eyes.

"Mom, I told you he designs car components. There's a big difference," I admonished.

She waved her hand dismissively. "Oh whatever, same thing."

Jake cleared his throat nervously. "It's a great job, Mrs. Dwyer. I get paid to do what I love, and I help to make big decisions about industry standards and trends. And the pay is nice too," he said with a grin.

Renee's eyes sparkled. "I bet it is! And please, call me Renee. Only my accountant calls me Mrs. Dwyer," she said with a laugh. She was in flirty rich mode and I wanted to slap her.

"How long have you two been dating?" She asked.

"It's only been two weeks officially, but we had our first date a few months ago," I responded dryly.

"Isabella Marie Swan! You've been hiding this man for _months_? Shame on you," She cooed as she patted Jake's leg. Jake laughed and glanced at me – I could tell he was a little uncomfortable, so I decided to change the subject.

"How was Florida?" I asked Phil.

He shrugged his shoulders. "Hot and muggy. Glad to be back home."

Renee jumped in. "We were thinking of Paris for Christmas. Bella, you and Jake should come with us! Oh it's absolutely magical to see the city covered in snow. It's not nearly as cold and dreadful as Canada in the winter, let me tell you."

I wrinkled my nose. "No thanks, I'd rather see Europe in the autumn. Besides, I'll probably have to work. The holidays are a stressful time for a lot of people."

"Oh Bella," Renee lamented before turning to Jake. "I keep telling her she could do so much better than working at that little place. With her smarts and education she could go really far, maybe even write books or teach at a university. Don't you think?"

Jake's eyes flickered to mine. "I think she should do whatever motivates her to get up in the morning. What's the point of living a life where you're unhappy?"

Renee frowned. "But she could be happier doing other things. She won't give it a chance." Renee pouted like a small child.

Thank God Phil intervened or I might have punched my mother. "Now Renee, remember we're very proud of Bella's accomplishments. She's made a great life for herself and if she's happy then we're happy for her."

Renee sat back, looking startled. "Of course that's true. I just want the best for my little Belly. I'm sorry, I sometimes get carried away."

Dinner was announced shortly after that unpleasant conversation. Thankfully my mother remained on her best behaviour throughout the meal, choosing to share anecdotes of their time in Florida instead of embarrassing me further. To his credit Jake was great. He smiled and laughed at the appropriate times, and made sure to compliment Renee on absolutely everything. I don't think my mother could approve of anyone more than she did Jake.

It filled me with pride knowing I had her approval. Even though she could be snobby and self-indulgent, I knew my mother had my best interests at heart. We may have clashing personalities in many ways but she was my mom and I loved her.

When at last we were freed from her clutches – after a few more rounds of cocktails – Jake slipped his arm around my waist as we walked to the subway station.

"That wasn't so bad," he said with a chuckle.

I shook my head. "My mother is a little much sometimes. You really don't have to sugar coat it," I replied.

His responding laugh bounced off the large expensive houses as we walked down the street. "Okay so she was a little overbearing. At least meeting my family won't be so bad since you already know Rachel."

My breathing hitched. "I guess that's the next big step, isn't it?"

His arm tightened. "Yes, but don't worry. Pops is really laid back. He's more of a burgers on the barbecue type than filet mignon and wine I can't even pronounce."

It was my turn to laugh loudly. "I'm so glad to hear it! God, you'd think my mother would know better than to pull this crap when I'm around. I swear sometimes she forgets who I am," I grumbled.

Jake leaned down and kissed the top of my head. "Don't worry about it. Life's too short. And so are you," he teased, trying to lighten the mood. It worked.

"Hey, I'm average. You're just freakishly huge," I quipped.

He put his free hand over his chest in mock surprise. "What a terrible thing to say! I'm shocked and appalled, Miss Swan, that you would call someone a freak. What would your mother say?"

I poked him in the gut. "Hey, if the shoe fits… and by the way, those are some big shoes."

He wiggled his eyebrows mischievously. "You know what they say about that, don't you?"

"Yes I do. Now let's get back to my place. Quickly," I replied as I pulled away and grabbed his hand, picking up the pace.

XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoX

Jake and I had barely made it through the front door before he had me pinned against the wall. His thick lips devoured me hungrily as his big hands kneaded my hips. I wrapped my arms around his neck and fisted his hair, groaning in his ear as he sucked and nipped at my neck. I wanted him so badly.

He reached around and grabbed my ass as I wrapped my legs around his midsection which allowed him to grind his rather sizeable erection into my hot core. We were frantic and excited, crazed with desire. I needed him to bring my release as soon as possible.

Then I heard my Skype going off from the coffee table.

"Ignore it," Jake whispered in my ear before taking my lobe into his mouth and sucking hard.

"Oh god, that's so good," I moaned.

I felt him grow harder. "Yeah, you like that? Come on, let's go to the bedroom," he said without setting me down.

My fucking Skype went off again. I pulled back from Jake and looked over his shoulder at the coffee table, wondering who could possibly be trying to contact me so urgently at this hour.

Jake sighed and set me down. "Go on then. Take care of it quickly, I'll wait in the bedroom."

I gave him a big smacking kiss and ran toward my computer just as the caller gave up. I saw a chat window open from Edward – his last message scared me.

**_E: Bella, please answer. I really need you right now, I don't know what to do!_**

I clicked on his name and tried calling him. He picked up very quickly.

"Oh Thank God, I was worried you weren't home," he said with a big sigh of relief.

I shook my head. "I just got home five minutes ago. I was visiting my mother," I replied, thinking I'd leave Jake out of the equation. "What's going on? What's so urgent?"

He ran his hands through his hair nervously. "I just heard from my mom… Dad's in the hospital."

"Oh no! What happened?" I exclaimed.

"She said he was having chest pains and trouble breathing, but that was hours ago and I can't get ahold of her anymore. And I have a wedding in a couple of hours…" he said in one breath.

"Edward, relax. Take a deep breath. Go to work and I'll check in on them first thing in the morning. They're probably just asleep," I said as calmly as I could.

"But what if it's serious? Do you think I should get on with the travel agent and get up there?"

I looked at him carefully. His eyes were wide and full of fear, his hair more disheveled than usual. I couldn't see it through Skype but I would bet money his hands were shaking. Still, my heart skipped a beat at the thought of him coming so near. If he'd go to Montreal, surely he would stop by to see me in Toronto, right?

_Don't be selfish. Do the right thing._

I sighed. "Not yet, it could be nothing. Just calm down and give me your mom's number so I can take care of it in a few hours. It's too late at night to be harassing her and you have to go to work."

He rubbed his face roughly. "Oh God, what if the last time I saw him _was_ the real last time? What if…"

"Stop!" I interrupted. "You're assuming the worst and that's not helpful. You don't know anything yet. Just focus on what you have to do today and trust that as soon as I hear anything I'll call you directly. Got it?"

He nodded sadly but his fists were still clenched with tension. God how I wanted to be there in person to help him calm down.

"Edward, I –" I started before I heard Jake's booming voice from the bedroom.

"Belllllla! It's cold in here. Come warm me up," he said seductively. I facepalmed myself – I'd completely forgotten about Jake.

Edward's face twisted from worry to rage in less than a second. "Am I keeping you from something?" He sneered.

I narrowed my eyes at him. "Don't do that. Yes I have company, but I'm here now helping _you_," I growled.

"Well maybe I should let you get back to playtime," he growled back.

"What the fuck is your problem?" I yelled. "Why does it matter to you?"

Before he could answer I heard Jake stomp into the room. He wasn't angry, he just had really heavy footsteps.

"Is everything okay?" He asked.

I turned to look at him and saw with despair he was wearing nothing but boxer briefs. As sexy as he was, I knew his lack of apparel would only aggravate my current situation. Of course I couldn't blame Jake, he had no idea what was happening. I heard Edward snort in the background though thankfully he didn't say anything. When I turned back to my computer screen, his arms were crossed over his chest and he was glaring at me.

"Edward, this is Jake," I said diplomatically. "Jake, this is my friend Edward. He lives in Australia."

Jake nodded in greeting. "Hey," he said. Edward only nodded back in acknowledgement.

"Jake, I'm just helping Edward with something. I'll be there soon," I said quietly, hoping Edward wouldn't be able to make out my words. No such luck.

"Tell you what, I'll let you get back to your activities and talk to you another time. Have _fun_," he said sarcastically.

"Send me your mom's number and I'll get ahold of her as soon as I can," I gently reminded him. Oh yes I was pissed off but I couldn't bear to have an all out brawl between Edward and Jake.

"I'll e-mail it so you don't get too distracted. Bye Bella," he said angrily before ending the call. My shoulders slumped and my head lowered sadly.

"He's a piece of work," Jake said from behind me.

I shook my head slightly. "He's going through something right now. Normally he isn't like that," I said defensively.

Jake put one hand on my shoulder. "Come to bed. I won't try anything tonight, seeing as you're obviously upset. Let's just try to get some sleep. Things always look better in the morning."

_Fuck I hope so._

XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoX

"Oh God, it was such a clusterfuck. I'm just glad Jake didn't hear the worst of it," I whined into my glass of vodka & cranberry juice.

"What got him so riled up?" Alice wondered.

Jasper jumped in. "It's pretty obvious I think," he said so quietly I barely heard him over the music in the bar.

"What?" Alice and I said at the same time.

Jasper shrugged his shoulders. "From a guy's perspective, it seems like he was jealous."

Jealous? Edward was jealous? I guess that explained his behaviour, but not his motivations. He obviously thought of me as just a friend, so what could he possibly be jealous about?

"Actually Bells, that would make sense. Maybe he does have feelings for you," Alice said.

I shook my head. "No. He made it very clear that we're only friends."

"Maybe so, but that doesn't mean he doesn't _want_ more. He's just being a realist," Jasper offered.

"And a tool," Alice added.

I looked at my friends for any hint of deception but they both wore earnest looks on their faces. Could it be true?

_No fucking way_. I really hated my inner monologue sometimes.

"Guys, shut up! They're about to start," Rose interrupted.

We all turned toward the little stage in anticipation. It was a Friday night and Jake had guilted me into inviting the gang out to see his band play at The Horseshoe. It was a different atmosphere from our usual hangout, which irked only Rose as the lesbian population in this establishment was likely close to zero. But like the trooper she was, Rose didn't complain at all. She actually seemed to get antsy and excited when Jake and his friends took the stage.

They weren't a serious band trying to make it big. Jake, Quil, Embry, and Emmett were a bunch of goofballs who worked fulltime and played the occasional gig for fun. I'd never heard their music before and I was really pumped to see how good they were.

As soon as the first chords were played, I was blown away. They were really something. Their sound was unique though I could make out some obvious influences: a little Queen, a hint of Boston, and even some Rage Against the Machine. Their lyrics were powerful and very politically-charged; I had no idea Jake was interested in this kind of thing. I watched them closely as Jake strummed out the lead guitar melody, Quil hammered on the bass, Embry banged on the drums frantically, and Emmett strummed the rhythm guitar while he sang.

Quil and Embry looked a lot like Jake. They had black hair, tan skin, dark eyes, and similar features although they were shorter and less muscled. Emmett was big and beefy with medium brown curly hair, dimples in his cheeks, lots of earrings, and a huge goofy grin. I couldn't believe that someone could be bulkier than Jake, but Emmett fit the bill. He was quite handsome too.

The first song ended with deafening applause from all around us. Our group stood and clapped & whistled with the rest of the crowd.

"Thank you everyone for coming out tonight," Emmett bellowed into the microphone. "That was something we cooked up last year called Cat in the Bag. Now we're gonna do a few covers before shit gets real!"

It took me a moment to recognize the next tune, but as soon as What's My Age Again by Blink 182 registered in my brain, Alice and I looked at each other with huge eyes. Without saying a word she rose and dragged me up to the area in front of the stage where we bounced around crazily with the crowd. After that they launched into a really fast rendition of Hotel California, followed by a punk version of R. Kelly's I Believe I Can Fly. The guys were really getting into it, strutting around the stage and making faces at each other as they rocked out.

After dancing for three songs I was in need of a break, so I led Alice back to our table where Jasper was grinning at us. I flopped into my chair and drained the rest of my drink, fanning myself with a napkin.

"Now we're gonna slow things down a bit. This is a song I wrote a few years ago. It's a ballad, so get ready to swoon ladies! And I'd like to dedicate it to the gorgeous blonde at the side of the room," Emmett pointed directly at Rose before strumming out a few chords. I think Alice nearly choked on her pina colada.

"Boy is he in for a huge shock," she yelled to me over the song.

I nodded. "No shit. I probably should have mentioned to Jake –"

"Shut up!" Rose shouted. "Just stop talking for three minutes. I wanna hear this," she pleaded.

I don't think any of us could have said something if we'd tried. Rose watched Emmett intently like a lion about to pounce on its prey as Alice, Jasper and I exchanged shocked glances. I knew Rose wasn't entirely set against men, but I'd never actually seen her this doe-eyed over one. In fact I don't ever remember her _trying_ with men at all. But it was obvious she was at least interested in Emmett if not completely smitten. I would have been less surprised if she'd grown floppy ears and a tail.

A few songs later, the guys finally put down their instruments. "Thanks for listening! We're Pussy Wagon, and we'll be back after a break. Don't go anywhere!" Emmett boomed.

They walked down the steps off the stage and immediately Emmett and Jake were headed straight to our table. We all stood up as they approached.

"Hey guys, thanks for coming out," Emmett said as he stared at Rose.

"No problem," I said. "You guys are really awesome!"

"This is Emmett McCarty, our lead singer and one of my best buds," Jake said.

Emmett pried his eyes from Rose to settle on each of us in turn.

"Hi Emmett," I said shyly. "I'm Bella. This is Alice, Jasper, and Rosalie," I said as I motioned to each person. Everyone took turns shaking hands politely as Jake walked to my side and sat in my seat.

"Woop, I'm beat. It's really fucking hot up there," he said as he pulled me onto his lap. Alice and Jasper sat down but Rose and Emmett stood staring at each other.

I turned my head and whispered, "Looks like we've been playing matchmaker without even trying."

Jake grinned. "I guess so!"

Finally Rose opened her mouth. "Well, are you going to stare at me or are you getting me a drink?"

Emmett's eyes twinkled. "Sure. Whatcha want?"

"Get me something hard and straight-up," she said with attitude before flopping down in her chair.

I leaned back into Jake. "She's testing him," I whispered.

"She's got some balls," Jake mumbled back.

When Emmett came back with a round of shots for the whole table, I knew he'd won over my very stubborn friend. He passed them around to everyone and made a toast before we knocked them back.

"To friends, old and new." He winked at Rose who actually fucking blushed.

Their second set was just as good as the first. I was surprised at how awesome they were considering I'd never heard of them before. Not that I was heavy in the local indie scene or anything, but I couldn't remember ever seeing posters or advertisements. You'd think with a band name as unique as Pussy Wagon I might have noticed something.

They played more original music, including another love ballad that Jake sang and dedicated to me. It was an unbelievably sweet gesture and I'm pretty sure my face was scarlet the entire time. I sat back in my chair and watched his thick lips move gently with the soulful words he pronounced. His voice was beautiful – kind of thick and gravelly yet soft and melodious. There was no doubt that Jake was as talented a musician as he was skilled in the bedroom. I couldn't wait to get him back to my place and have my way with him. And from the look on Rose's face, Emmett was going to get just as lucky tonight.

XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoX

When I crawled out of bed the next morning to start my daily routine I was surprised to see an e-mail from Edward…

_Bella,  
I'm writing to say how sorry I am about the way I behaved the other night. I was upset about my dad and Jake caught me off guard. It's no excuse and I wouldn't blame you for never wanting to talk to me again. But I really hope you'll accept my apology and treat this as a one off thing. You know me well enough to see that I don't usually behave so badly. I promise it won't happen again.  
Please forgive me?  
Your Edward_

I re-read that letter over and over again as I sipped on my special Peruvian roast. He was right about one thing – his behaviour that night was uncharacteristic of him. He hadn't fully explained himself but I could see the merit of forgiving him and moving on. After all, everyone handles difficult situations differently. I hit reply and typed a message back.

_Edward,  
Thank you for the olive branch. Yes I will forgive you, but I won't forget. Don't let it happen again.  
It's one thing if someone really deserves to be told off, and had that been the case I would be the humble one. But I didn't deserve the way you treated me. I want you to know you hurt me and for seemingly no reason.  
That's all I'm going to say on the subject, so let's consider it closed from now on.  
How is your dad? Did they ever find out what caused his allergic reaction?  
-Bella_

Although I knew I was in social-worker mode, I shrugged my shoulders and hit send. That's just who I am, like it or leave it.

I sat back and contemplated his words. He was upset over his father, which was understandable. He didn't normally behave that way? Very true. But did he honestly think this would be a breaking point for me? Does he have so little faith in our friendship that one fight, however stupid and meaningless, could motivate me to cut him off?

I shook my head sadly. I guess he didn't know me as well as I thought he did. I don't let go of people very easily. A friend has always been something very special to me, probably due to my frequent moving as a kid. I never really had a lot of friends growing up so when we finally settled permanently in Toronto I made it my mission to grow some roots. I never wanted to feel nomadic again and friends were the best way to anchor me.

Granted I'd never felt this way about any of my other friends. I loved them without question but only in a platonic way. Wait, did I just infer that I loved Edward Cullen? No way. I absolutely cannot let that thought continue. Nope, uh uh, it stops _here_ and _now_.

_But…_ NO. NO BUTS.

When Jake walked into the living room I practically jumped out of my skin. How does he have super human timing?

"Morning sleepyhead," I said with a chuckle. He was adorable with his long hair sticking out in every direction as he rubbed his eyes sleepily.

"Is that coffee I smell?" He asked through his haze.

"Yup!" I replied, jumping off the couch to fetch him a mug.

He flopped down and turned on the TV, going straight to sports highlights. When I returned with his mug of java and handed it to him, I wrinkled my nose with irritation.

"Do we have to watch that?"

He chuckled. "Give me a break here, I just woke up. Give me a few minutes of mindlessness before I have to do anything more grueling than watch grown men fight each other."

"You use a lot of big words for someone so sleepy," I replied cheekily.

He wiggled his eyebrows at me. "Big words for a big boy."

I couldn't help but laugh. Jake was just a big kid in a lot of ways. He was playful, funny, and carefree. I really envied that about him. But he was also a good balance of mature and responsible which also appealed to me.

Jake took a big sip of coffee before putting it on the coffee table. "Come here," he said, gesturing to his lap with his arms outstretched and a mischievous grin. I couldn't resist temptation, the man was very sexy.

And that's why I was late for my lunch date with Alice.

XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoX

When I arrived at Hoy for our sushi date, Alice was waiting impatiently with her arms crossed over her chest. I sat down across from her and smiled sheepishly.

"Sorry Ali. Jake kept me up late," I said with a grin.

Her hostility melted away as she returned my grin. "Really? Okay, you're forgiven for now."

I ordered a bottle of sparkling water from the waitress and folded my hands on the table in front of me.

"Have you heard from Rose?" I asked.

Alice started bouncing in her seat. "Not yet. I thought we could call her together on speaker phone after we eat lunch!"

I had to laugh at her enthusiasm. "Good plan. I wonder what happened?"

Alice shook her head. "It's obvious I think. Emmett could have been the biggest douche in the world and I'm sure she would have followed him home. Did you see her making googly eyes at him all night?"

"Yes! Oh man, that was a shocker for sure," I replied, taking a sip of my sparkling water.

"Definitely. So, I have some news about the wedding!" Alice trilled.

I winced and put my glass down. "What now? Please tell me you're still planning to let me choose my own dress," I half joked.

Alice frowned at me like a little kid. "Actually no, but that's not the big news. Jasper and I had a really long talk and decided we wanted to do something different for our wedding. Personally I think he just wants to go surfing, but it's a neat idea and I'm totally on board –"

"Alice! Take a breath, please, and slow down. What idea is this?" I interrupted.

Alice giggled. "Oops, sorry. Jas and I decided we're getting married in Hawaii!"

_Hawaii is halfway to Australia…_


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: WARNING: There is some very sensitive material in this chapter that deals with domestic violence. If you are sensitive about this sort of thing, don't read. I'll post a short chapter summary at the end.**

**Again, thank you for all the reviews and support! Please keep them coming!**

*****Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight. I'm just babysitting her dogs.*****

* * *

EPOV

Fucking fuckity fuck fuckeroo.

FUCK.

Every fucking time I log onto Facebook there's a new photo of Bella and her boyfriend together.

It makes me sick.

It's not like I have anything personal against the guy. He looks decent enough, and my Facebook creeping proved he's probably not completely psychotic. He's got a good job, seems to have a close family, and I didn't see anything that immediately sent up red flags. All the same I don't like him. He's bad news.

Why?

Because he's Bella's fucking boyfriend.

What the fuck am I going to do about this clusterfuck situation?

BPOV

I smiled and nodded politely as Billy Black told me yet _another_ story of Jake's high school football days. It's not that I wasn't interested in hearing about Jake, quite the opposite actually. I just couldn't handle all the detailed information about yard lines, passes, or field strategies. I hate organized sports. And so I tried my best not to let my eyes glaze over as he painted a vivid picture of Jake being the centre of the universe. I was completely grateful when Rachel intervened.

"Dad, quit boring Bella. She's our guest," she reprimanded from the kitchen where she was finishing dinner.

Billy chuckled. "Sorry, I get carried away sometimes."

Rachel rolled her eyes. "Jacob wasn't really _that_ good. He actually spent more time on the bench than he did playing. Trust me, I was dragged out to every damn game!"

Jake laughed loudly. "Like I wasn't forced to sit through your debate club competitions! Now talk about _boring_," he joked.

"Now kids, let's take it down a notch," Billy warned. "So Bella, Rachel tells me you're a counselor?"

I nodded. "Yep, I'm a social worker at the centre."

"And she makes the big bucks too!" Rachel yelled.

It was my turn to chuckle. "Hardly. I work at a non-profit organization. If I went into private practice maybe, but I'm happy enough. Besides I don't need that much money anyway," I replied to Billy before I could turn on my brain-to-mouth filter. Thankfully he didn't push for more information. If he had been my mother, well… she would have insisted on knowing.

He smiled at me. "It's nice to know there are people out there who legitimately care about others. You're a rare gem, Bella Swan."

"She sure is," Jake added with a big grin.

"Food's ready!" Rachel interrupted.

Dinner was incredible. Chicken ceasar salad, baked potatoes, and blush pasta. Between the food and the beers I drank, I was way too stuffed for raspberry ice cream as we continued chatting in the living room afterward.

We sat in the living room of Billy Black's small but cozy house in south Etobicoke. Like the rest of the house, the living room was full of old floral patterned wallpaper with the walls lined with family portraits. The big couch looked like it was covered in old, worn curtains from the 1970s while the love seat and armchair were a clashing burnt orange very characteristic of the 1960s. The floor was covered in brown fuzz that was probably shag carpeting when it was new but had obviously been worn down from years of traffic. Yes, it was very dated, but it had a homey lived-in feel that made me feel comfortable.

"See Dad, I told you they would hit it off," Rachel stated smugly from the love seat she was sharing with her husband, Will Wainwright.

"Rach, shut up. You're going to embarrass Bella," Jake warned as he shot her a stern glare.

"Jacob Black! Do not talk to your sister that way," Billy growled.

Will and I chuckled in unison at the family antics.

"Tell me about your family," Billy said as he looked back at me.

I cleared my throat nervously. "Well there's not much to say really. Dad died about ten years ago, and my mother is married to Phil Dwyer so they travel a lot."

Billy gasped. "THE Phil Dwyer?"

I laughed and nodded. "Yes, the very same. They travel a lot during the baseball season so I don't see much of them in the warmer months. I could try and weasel some tickets for you," I offered.

Billy put his hand over his chest, faking heart failure. Then he addressed Jake directly. "You will _not_ screw this up. You're marrying this girl, you hear?"

Jake's eyes twinkled. "Maybe someday," he said as he winked at me.

And that's when Edward's face flashed before my eyes.

XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoX

Alice was insisting her wedding should take place on Victoria Day weekend in May despite Jasper's assurance there wouldn't be any fireworks in the US. Her response? 'Well we'll have to set up our own fireworks display.' That was very typical of Alice. I couldn't wait to watch the drama play out as she and Jasper fought over this matrimonial detail. He had also vetoed ice sculptures and walking down the aisle on horseback, so Alice was feeling especially stubborn about the date. I went ahead and booked the time off work knowing Alice would eventually win this argument.

If I'm being completely honest with myself, the news that Jake wouldn't be accompanying me to Hawaii for Alice's wedding was a huge relief. I never let him know I thought that way, of course, but there was no way to deny it to myself. I liked Jake. I liked him a lot. But by May we would only have been a couple for ten months and I wasn't ready for something as big as vacationing together. Unfortunately I discovered one night that Jake felt differently.

"I'm ssssoorry babe, I really wanna come to Haway wif you," he mumbled drunkenly as he leaned his weight on me.

I was trying to support his massive frame and hail a cab at the same time, and boy was I failing. Luckily Emmett came out of the bar at the crucial moment before I dropped Jake on his ass.

"Need some help?" He said as he took my spot as Jake's crutch.

I rolled my eyes. "I've never seen him like this before."

Emmett's eyes narrowed at Jake. "Big guy doesn't usually drink this much. Look, there's a cab!" He exclaimed as a taxi pulled over to the curb in front of us.

"Thank God," I mumbled. "Come on Jake, let's get you home," I said as Emmett helped fold him into the backseat of the cab where he refused to sit upright. I sighed, thanked Emmett, and got into the front seat with the driver.

We arrived at Jake's place in record time. Unfortunately for me that meant peeling him out of the car and half carrying him into the house he shared with Quil and Embry, who were not home yet. I pulled Jake upstairs to his bedroom and tried to get him undressed as he lay on his massive bed.

"Belllllla, I fuckin love you girl," he purred in a drunken haze. I had to hold my breath when he burped because he smelled like the inside of a brewery.

"I know, come on Jake, you need to sleep now," I said as I wiggled his jeans off his glorious hips.

"But I'm sowwy," he said in a fake little kid voice. It was irritating.

"Sorry for what?" I said absent-mindedly as I yanked off his pants. Jake kicked off his jeans and pulled off his shirt before grabbing my shoulders and pulling me on top of him.

"Sorvy bout the trip," he mumbled. I could tell he was trying to search my eyes but his own were unable to focus on anything clearly. He was in really bad shape.

I patted his cheek gently. "We'll talk about this tomorrow. Let's just get some rest," I said in my most soothing voice.

That's when it happened. I don't know how or why, but all of a sudden Jake snapped and pushed me off him angrily.

"You don't fucking care that I can't go to Ha-haway with you!" He yelled.

I was beyond shocked. "Jake, calm down! It's okay, really. It's only for a few days then I'll be back," I said diplomatically avoiding his accusation.

"No it's not! You don't care about me! Who gives a shit about what I feel?" He spat out as he sat up and ruffled his long, messy hair. "Fuck!"

"Jake, I'm sorry. I'll miss you," I said quietly, placing a hand on his shoulder. He shook me off.

"No you fucking won't! You only give a shit about yourself! You don't fucking care if I'm there!" He screamed.

By now Jake was standing upright, pacing his room like a madman. I'll admit I was frightened to see him like this – the Jake I knew was always so happy-go-lucky. What did I do? What did I say? I racked my brain, trying to remember if this outburst was my fault somehow but I came up blank. I had no idea why he was so mad.

"Please come to bed," I pleaded.

"You don't want to sleep with me, I'm just a piece of fucking shit!" He yelled with balled up fists. For a moment I was truly frightened for my own safety.

"Jake, you're scaring me. Please calm down," I begged, feeling tears prick at my eyes.

He looked at me, his eyes suddenly able to focus on my face. I looked back at him and saw nothing but a mask of fear, hatred, and rage. It hadn't escaped my notice that his words were no longer slurred or that he was now capable of walking in a straight line, and it scared the ever loving shit out of me. I could feel my fight-or-flight response starting to kick in, and at the moment it was begging for the latter.

"Why the fuck would you want me to go to Hawaii when you don't give two shits about me?" He said in a cold, calculated, monotone voice, all the time maintaining eye contact.

_Oh God, this is it. He's going to hurt me._

"I care about you a lot," I responded weakly.

"Then fucking say it. Say the fucking words!" He bellowed as he gestured wildly.

"Jake this is not appropriate. I want to be able to say it when we're both calm and sober," I replied as my hands started shaking and my adrenaline kicked in. I mentally calculated how easily I could get to his bedroom door and down the stairs before he could catch me. My odds weren't good.

"You hate me! You fucking HATE ME! I knew it! I'm not a fucking drunk, and I can take care of myself. I don't need to be babied by someone who doesn't fucking love me!" He said as he took one step toward the bed.

At that moment the bedroom door opened and I looked over to see Quil and Embry enter the room with hard looks on their faces.

"Come on, Jake buddy, let's go sit down," Quil said as he and Embry each grabbed one of Jake's arms.

"Sonofabitch, leave me the fuck alone!" Jake screamed and thrashed against their grip.

That's when the tears spilled down my cheeks and a sob escaped my throat. I was so relieved to be saved yet still petrified of all I'd witnessed.

Though Quil and Embry were not as large as Jake, I was grateful they seemed to be almost as strong. They had a good grip on Jake who was still struggling and yelling as they half dragged him out of the room. I stayed in place listening to the ruckus of Jake being forced down the stairs to the living room, then of Quil yelling for him to stop acting like a pussy. Yet I could tell Jake was still putting up a fuss when I heard the telltale sound of furniture being dragged across the hardwood floor. Then I heard the unmistakable sound of skin slapping hard against skin, and all went quiet.

I curled up in the fetal position and cried, praying to any deity that would listen that Jake hadn't knocked them out. What would I do if he came back for me? Would I make it out of here unharmed?

The sound of footsteps on the stairs sent my heart into overdrive and my palms turned clammy. I searched my brain for memories of my father's self-defense training and put a few moves into my active mind. I knew I should take an offensive position but I couldn't will my limbs to move. I feared I might be stuck in this position forever.

When I saw Embry's worried face peek around the door, I exhaled with relief.

"Are you okay?" He asked tentatively.

I couldn't hold back anymore. I burst into fitful, snotty, hiccupping sobs. My body shook with tension and fear as I released my anxiety onto Jake's bed.

Embry crawled up beside me and rubbed my back soothingly. "Shhh, it's okay. He's calm now. There's nothing to worry about."

XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoX

By the time Embry had peeled me off Jake's bed and stuck me in a cab, I was at least able to walk even if the tears wouldn't stop. I'd chanced a glance at Jake before walking out the door – he was passed out on the couch with Quil sitting next to him. Both he and Embry gave me sympathetic looks as I practically ran out the front door.

When I got home it was already 3AM and my brain was working on overdrive. I was exhausted, yes, but the adrenaline was still flowing and I was extremely distressed. I needed to talk to someone. And at this hour I had only one option – Edward Cullen.

With shaking fingers I dialed his number from my cellphone without caring how expensive this call would be. I needed to hear my voice of reason.

"Cullen," he said as he answered after the second ring.

"Edward?" I whispered.

"Bella! What's wrong?" He asked, sounding panicked.

For the second time this evening I completely broke down into hysterical sobbing and incomprehensible wailing. I couldn't help it – the image of Jake standing menacingly next to me was more than I could handle.

"Bella, calm down. Please tell me what happened," he pleaded.

"I… Jake… oh God!" I said as I descended into more sobs.

"Jake… is he okay? Was there an accident?" He asked frantically.

I sniffed and blew my nose. "No. Jake… he… he –"

I heard Edward inhale sharply before asking, "Did he hurt you?"

"No. I mean yes. Or… I don't know," I blathered.

"Bella, calm down. Did he hit you?" Edward asked. His voice was poisonous and laced with venom.

I sniffed again. "No he never touched me. But I thought he would. Oh God, I thought he was going to attack me!" I cried. There was silence for a moment except for Edward's labored breathing. "Edward? Are you still there?" I asked timidly.

"Tell me what happened," he commanded.

"Well he was drunk. Like, really really drunk. I've never seen him like that before. I was helping him into bed, taking off his pants, and all of a sudden he turned from slurry and half asleep into a raging monster. I don't know what happened! I never said anything!" I wailed, trying to stifle a new set of wet, snotty tears as I shut my eyes tight.

"Were you guys fighting or something?" Edward asked.

"That's the thing," I replied, "I hardly said anything. I was trying to get him to pass out. Then he stood up and freaked out saying I didn't care about him and how I don't want him around when I go to Hawaii. I didn't do anything wrong," I said, feeling calmer but still very upset.

"Hawaii? Oops, nevermind… Okay, from what I can tell you are _not_ to blame. Hell even if you were egging him on he had no right to do that. Don't blame yourself here, he's obviously got some issues," he said in a soothing voice that was laced with concern.

I rolled my eyes. "Obviously! But I had no idea at all, he's always been so kind and thoughtful. If I had any idea that this would happen…"

Edward sighed. "Look, I know this was shitty. If I was there I'd beat the shit out of him. But as it is, you have to think about the future. What are you going to do?"

I answered truthfully. "I don't know."

XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoX

I woke up the next morning, a Sunday, with a huge headache from crying so hard the previous night. I stayed in bed most of the day trying to figure out what I should do. When Jake called I didn't bother answering it, but I did listen to the voicemail.

"Bella! I'm so sorry about last night. I don't remember much but Quil told me about… about what happened. Please call me back so we can talk about it. I'm really, really, _really_ sorry."

I didn't call back.

Monday…  
"Please talk to me. I know you must be super pissed right now but we need to talk about what happened. I feel like a grade A asshole. _PLEASE_ let me make it up to you."

Tuesday…  
"I know you're ignoring me and I know I deserve it. Please Bella, I'm in hell over here. I feel like shit about what I did. I just want to make things right. Please call me."  
Wednesday…  
"Okay I get that you're ignoring me. I know I deserve it, and believe me I'm paying the price. I did a really shitty thing and I don't deserve your forgiveness, but I'd really like to know where we stand. At least let me know if you're still my girlfriend. I miss you."

On Thursday Jake had the nads to show up at my work at the end of the day. I was just locking up my office when I heard his voice behind me.

"Hey," he said quietly.

I pulled my key out of the lock and shoved it in my purse before turning around to face him. He really did look terrible, with large purple bags under his eyes as though he hadn't slept in days and greasy hair tied haphazardly into a ponytail.

"Geez, Jake! Do you go to work looking like that?" I exclaimed.

He chuckled lowly. "I, um… called in sick today. I wanted to surprise you," he mumbled shyly.

I narrowed my eyes at him. "Well, job done. Now if you'll excuse me I'm on my way home."

I could hear him follow me down the hallway, past the reception desk where Rose was still working for another half hour, and out the front door. As soon as we were outside I turned around to face him.

"What do you want?" I asked angrily.

"I was hoping we could talk," he said quietly.

"What's there to discuss?" I sneered. "I got your messages. I know how _sorry_ you are."

His shoulders slumped a little. "Don't you have any questions or anything?"

I shook my head. "Nope. I think you were pretty straightforward. You think I don't care about you, that I see you as pond scum, and that I'm going to Hawaii to cheat on you. Is that about right?"

Jake reached out and put one hand on my shoulder. "Bella, I…"

I wriggled out of his grasp. "Don't fucking touch me!" I yelled.

He looked shocked as he pulled back. "I'm so sorry. I never wanted you to see me that way," he said as he sat down on a cement block, covering his face with his hands in frustration. It pulled at my heart strings a little.

"Jake, you do owe me an explanation. What the hell happened?" I asked, a little more gently.

He shook his head. "That's not the first time I've… flown off the handle. Most of the time I don't remember it. The first few times I didn't believe Quil when he told me about it the next day, but when others said the same thing I couldn't just ignore it anymore. It's why I don't drink much anymore."

I sighed in frustration and sat down next to him, maintaining a bit of distance so we wouldn't accidentally touch. He lifted his head and gave me a small smile which I found heartwarming despite his red, puffy eyes.

"Have you ever been to a counselor about it?"

The smile faded and his eyes narrowed. "I don't need _therapy_, I just need to cut down on the booze. I'm not crazy," he retorted.

"Jake, people go to counselors for many different reasons. Some for grief, others for advice, and yes some have mental health issues but that's not a necessary qualification. I work with plenty of people here who are just as normal as you or I. Getting help for a problem doesn't make them weak any more than it means they're crazy. Sometimes we all need an objective, impartial voice. Somewhere safe to let out frustrations and anxieties. I could recommend some good people," I offered diplomatically.

He gripped the hair on his scalp with tight fists. "I don't know about all that. Can we just focus on us for now?"

I sighed again. This guy was stubborn. "Okay, fine. But I haven't forgiven you just yet. You really scared me, and I need some time to figure things out for myself."

"Are we breaking up?" he asked, sounding like I'd kicked his dog.

I looked into his dark, expressive eyes. The same eyes that five nights ago had frightened the crap out of me. Today they showed no signs of rage – he was all remorse, worry, and fear. He didn't want to lose me anymore than I wanted to end our relationship. But could I move past what happened? Could I give him a second chance? I really was on the fence about it.

"No, we're not breaking up yet. But you have a lot of groveling to do, and I mean it when I say I'll need some space. You shook my trust and you're going to have to earn it back. The hard way." I said matter-of-factly.

He nodded and smiled. "Thank you," he whispered.

I smiled back and stood up. "You can start by walking me to the subway. I need to get home and change before another bridal party meeting at Alice's place."

XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoX

Jake kept his word about making it up to me. Several times a week I received deliveries of flowers, gifts, and sometimes there would be breakfast waiting for me at my desk in the morning. He didn't push me to see him and always let me initiate contact except for the odd text message or e-mail.

I took everything in stride, but as the weeks passed I found myself putting that traumatic night behind me and allowing Jake back into my life the way he had been before. Somehow I learned to forgive his behaviour even though I'd likely never forget it. It was easier than I thought – Jake was such a warm, loving man.

I kept the events of that night to myself. I didn't say a thing to Alice, Rose, Jasper, or Rachel because I knew the first three would pitch an anti-Jake campaign, and really it was _my_ decision to let it go. I didn't need three monkeys on my back about it. Besides, it was probably only a one time thing. Jake himself said he rarely got drunk.

So autumn turned into winter. Christmas came and went, which I spent with the Blacks since my mother insisted on Christmas in Paris. New Year's Eve was nerve racking but Jake only had two beers the entire night of Alice's house party. In January my vacation was officially approved so I excitedly booked my week long trip to Hawaii, making sure to use the same hotel Alice & Jasper chose for their nuptials.

Work was the same as usual. The few times I saw Quil & Embry they never breathed a word of that night with Jake. I guessed they had a "don't ask, don't tell" policy when it came to him. Emmett and Rose started dating exclusively, much to the shock and horror of the LGBTQ community. It was nice to have a sense of normalcy in my life and a routine I could manage. Everything seemed to fall into place.

Except for Edward, who was appalled I'd given Jake another shot. To his credit he never flew off the handle about it or anything, but I saw his jaw tighten when I made that revelation to him. It didn't escape my notice that Edward asked about Jake a lot in the following weeks, making sure to hash out every detail that seemed inconsistent to him. I knew he was looking out for me and I really appreciated it but there was more than one time I wanted to flip him off over Skype. Gradually Edward seemed to become resigned to my relationship status and stopped asking about Jake.

As winter turned to spring and my one year anniversary of meeting Edward came around, I grew increasingly sad. I couldn't believe an entire year had passed since my life-changing flight to Los Angeles. Well it hadn't affected my daily life, but meeting him had definitely altered my perception of things. I missed him terribly and hoped we'd be able to meet again soon. I just didn't know how to approach the subject without sounding as needy as I did when we'd first parted. I didn't want to scare him.

EPOV

When Bella told me about "that night" with her boyfriend, I had to physically stop myself from booking a trip to Toronto for the sole purpose of kicking his ass.

I mean, who does that? Seriously, this guy sounded like a total jerk. And then she forgave him! Bella Swan must be a saint, there simply is no other explanation. What a kind, caring, intelligent, funny, amazing person could see in someone who would pull that kind of shit is beyond me. She could do so much better. Bella deserves only the best and it killed me that she settled for that dog. Couldn't she see herself clearly?

Even after such a long acquaintance I still wasn't privy to all the things that make Bella tick. She's an unusual person, in a good way – she always keeps me on my toes guessing at what's coming next. It was what I loved about her… shit, did I just use the "L" word?

I'd known this mysterious, enigmatic woman for nearly a year. We've only spent a total of four days physically in each other's company. Yet there was something about her, something unexplainable, that popped into my head every single time I was propositioned by someone. I'd definitely had my fair share of opportunities with the delicate sex, and even once with my own sex. But whenever I'd get the inkling to say yes, I'd see her face dance across my vision.

I can't help it. Bella Swan had captured my interest. My _sole_ interest.

And even though I felt guilty as hell I couldn't help picturing her petite, tight body as I pleasured myself each morning in the shower. It was always her, no one else, who starred in those X-rated fantasies. Remembering her in that tiny bikini on the beach, or her short blue dress with her legs that go on forever, or even the way her skinny jeans hugged her delectable ass. I knew it was wrong to use her that way but fuck it felt so _right_. Even after all this time the sight of her stirred feelings in me that were so foreign yet delicious.

And I wasn't able to take out my frustrations with someone else; Bella's presence in my life wouldn't allow it. Fuck!

As the date of her friend's wedding drew nearer, and she spent more time talking about it when we chatted online, an idea brewed in my head. I only had to talk to my business partners and book the time off. I hoped it would work… I _needed_ to see her again. Very badly.

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**Short summary: Bella meets Jake's lower middle class family and gets along just fine with them. Bella takes a really drunk Jake home from the bar where he has an episode of rage. It scares her badly but she's able to forgive him after he works hard to win her trust. Edward debates meeting Bella in Hawaii for Alice's wedding.**

**Please review! Let me know what you think. Will something happen between Bella and Edward, even with Jake in the picture? Hmmmm.**


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: Thanks for sticking with this story! I know at least one of you was unimpressed with Bella last chapter, so try to have faith that everything has a purpose. We're now working toward the HEA though I can't promise there won't be more angst before the end. Actually I can guarantee there will be, strictly because it makes for a better story in my opinion.**

**As always, I love hearing from you! For good or bad! :)**

*****Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight. Someday I might own sunrise.*****

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BPOV

By the time my plane landed in Honolulu I was certain I'd be sporting some grey hair in my otherwise dark brown locks. To say it was an awful experience would be a gross understatement, and an insult to the word 'awful.'

First, Jake had driven me to Pearson International Airport in Embry's piece of shit car that I would have sworn was about to break down. After that harrowing journey, in which I gripped the handle of the door for dear life through morning rush hour traffic, Jake and I had a huge fight instead of parting on good terms. I guess I should have foreseen that happening – Jake had been increasingly difficult over the past few months. There were no repeats of the night-that-shall-not-be-mentioned, but it seemed like the moment I let him fully back into my life we rarely got along.

So I stomped away from my boyfriend angrily instead of kissing him goodbye. What a piss off.

Then I was seated next to the fattest, smelliest, chattiest person on the plane. I always insist on getting a window seat when I fly, so I guess the person who had taken my booking saw fit to sit me next to an unfunny Chris Farley wannabe who sweat profusely and had probably never used a hair brush.

All I wanted to do was sit back and listen to my iPod, maybe have a snack, and eventually fall asleep under the spell of my tranquilizers. Not this time. Instead I got to listen to his theories about the end of the world, pretend to care about his multiple photos of pet bunnies, and tried to ignore his persistent and not-so-subtle flirting. All this while trying to ignore my fear of flying over a large expanse of water for multiple hours. Scenes from Cast Away floated through my mind as I tried to tune out Mr. Smelly Magoo.

Thank God my luggage was at the carousel – if I'd had to deal with lost baggage I might have taken someone's eye out with the heel of my boot.

After grabbing my bags, I went over to the shuttle bus area to wait for my transportation to the hotel. Alice and Jasper had agreed on having their wedding at Turtle Bay Resort in Kahuku on the north side of Oahu Island. It was about an hour's drive from the airport through the middle of the island and I hoped to God I wouldn't be stuck sitting near anyone like I did on the plane. After nine hours of that torture I'm not sure I could have endured another five minutes of it.

Luckily I didn't have to wait very long. As soon as the shuttle arrived I noted with satisfaction there were only half a dozen of us getting on board the large van. I was able to relax and spread out for the remainder of my trip.

I sat and watched the scenery with awe. As soon as we left the city of Honolulu on the freeway heading north, there was an abrupt change to the view. For miles around everything seemed flat but very lush. There were palm trees and fruit trees mixed with large, pointy bushes and bright green grass. Off in the East I could see green coloured mountains I knew were closer than they appeared.

As we continued north, we passed by farms and open fields with plenty of wild animals grazing lazily in the setting sun. It felt like I was in another world. After turning east for a few miles, we passed through a larger settlement before once again turning north onto a new highway. Most of the houses we passed were weathered one storey bungalows surrounded by lush greenery and a small shopping district. When I saw a sign telling me we were driving through Haleiwa, I made a mental note to come back and visit this place.

As the bus turned north east, I noticed we were driving parallel to the ocean and the view was spectacular. I'd seen photos and postcards of the beauty of a Hawaiian sunset, but nothing compares to seeing it firsthand. I watched rows of palm trees swaying as we drove by. They were the only things separating the highway from the extensive beach and I felt the urge to hop out of the bus and run my toes through the gorgeous white sand.

_All in good time_, I reminded myself.

At long last we arrived at the hotel. I dragged my luggage out of the van and pulled the heavy load into the main building along with the other passengers. I was greeted warmly by the desk clerk – she was far too perky for my liking.

"Aloha! Welcome to Hawaii!" She trilled eagerly. "My name is Jessica. How can I help you?"

"I'm Bella Swan. I have a reservation under the Brandon/Hale wedding accommodations," I said mechanically.

She clicked a few keys on the computer and grinned. "There you are! I see you have a beach cottage reserved, is that correct?"

"Yes. Please set me up near Alice and Jasper. I'm the maid of honour and I'll likely have to visit with them frequently," I ordered brusquely. I couldn't help it, my patience was at its end.

"Certainly Miss Swan, we can take care of that for you."

She gave me a form to fill out and, after providing my credit card and driver's license, I got the key to my room that opened up on the beach. A very tired looking bellhop carried my luggage to my room, which boasted hardwood floors, a kitchenette, a huge four poster king size bed, and a little outdoor seating area beyond floor-to-ceiling sliding glass doors. It was perfect.

"Thank you," I said as I handed him a tip. He nodded and left the room without saying a word.

I wanted to go out to the beach and sit in the sand. I was craving the feel of the ocean on my skin and wind in my hair. But exhaustion was becoming overwhelming, so I inwardly cursed this terrible day and decided to go to bed for the night. After all, I had a week here so I'd have plenty of time.

EPOV

I stared longingly at the beachfront villas, wishing I'd had the foresight to research available accommodations at this resort. It was unusual for me not to know exactly where I was going, down to the last detail, but this had been thrown together so last minute I hadn't had time to worry about the small things.

I'd had to call in a lot of favours to get the time off to be here. My chef would be working overtime, my workers were getting extra hours, and I'd had to cede control of daily operations to my new assistant manager. The week was all planned out with jobs nearly every day, and in some cases multiple times per day, but I still worried about his ability to handle things without me hovering over him. Yeah I could be a bit of a control freak.

But it didn't matter in the end – other things were more pressing than my business affairs. For the first time in a _very_ long time, I had other priorities to consider. Mostly because ignoring them was making me miserable.

So I stood on my balcony in the early morning light, stretching my achy muscles, feeling the desire to hit the waves to wake me up. My fingers twitched at the thought, but my brain belayed that possibility. Today I was on a mission to find Bella Swan.

BPOV

My cellphone went off early in the morning, bringing me out of a very deep sleep. My king size bed was just as glorious to sleep in as it was to look at – it was the best night's sleep I'd had in weeks.

I reached over to my end table to grab my phone and groaned when I saw Jake's picture flash on the screen.

_This should be fun_.

"Hey," I said with my morning pre-coffee froggy voice.

"Shouldn't you be up already?" He said condescendingly. I noticed he didn't even say hello.

I glanced at the alarm clock. "It's seven in the morning. There's a time difference, remember?" I snapped.

He sighed. "I know. UGH this isn't going how I'd planned… I didn't call to fight. I wanted to say I'm sorry about how we left things at the airport. I feel like shit about it."

I huffed. "You always feel like _shit_ about it afterward, but that doesn't stop you from picking fights at the time now does it?" I snapped.

"Me? What about you? You're the one who bitched about that waitress at the restaurant last week," he replied angrily.

"Yes because she was outright flirting with you like I wasn't even there!" I exclaimed. "Besides, that was _one_ fight out of how many that you've started?"

"Fuck! I'm fucking sorry, okay!" He yelled so loud I winced and held the phone away from my head.

I sighed. "Can we not talk about this now? I'm going to have a really long day," I pleaded.

"Fine," he grumbled. "But this isn't over."

I rolled my eyes. "Of course not."

"What the hell does that mean?" He boomed.

"Nothing. I'll talk to you later," I replied before hanging up on him.

Thankfully he left me alone long enough to order room service for breakfast. By the time my food was delivered, I'd had texts from Alice and Rose before a rather hostile note from Jake begging me to call him later in the afternoon.

I took my tray of food to my little outdoor seating area and ate my pancakes and yogurt in silence as I enjoyed the gentle breeze blowing through my hair. It was shaping up to be a beautiful day although it would likely be very hot. I was due to meet the bridal party at Alice's suite by 9:00 to begin our pre-wedding girlie activities. There was going to be a lot of female bonding today – I shuddered at the thought.

It's not that I don't like hanging out with women, it's just that I generally dislike large groups of women together for long periods of time. It tends to grate on my nerves. I have a hard time dealing with social drama, girlie squealing, and malicious backstabbing. Not to mention inherent competition for attention of the opposite sex.

After finishing my food, I pulled out the garment bag holding my bridesmaid dress out of my suitcase and hung it in the small closet near the bed. I then grabbed my clothes for the day and headed into the shower. I knew I would not be forgiven if I didn't have my hair and makeup done to perfection for my very bossy best friend.

An hour later I looked at my reflection in the full length mirror and had to smile. I chose a dark blue cotton sundress with spaghetti straps that ended halfway down my thighs. Underneath I had my bright red bikini with high cut bottoms and push up cups. My long hair was straightened and my eyes were highlighted with nudes and a touch of white to make my face sparkle. I knew Alice would be pleased, and really that's all that mattered. It's not like I was here to pick up a man.

I finished my outfit with a pair of black crocs and grabbed my white tote bag as I walked out the door. Alice had informed me she was in a beach villa about a two minute walk from my beach cottage. The difference between the two was staggering as I approached the large, roomy house. The villa had four bedrooms and lavish common space with a large deck on the beach side. My own little cottage that consisted of a nice hotel room in its own beachfront building paled in comparison.

I could hear the chaotic din of voices emanating from the living room as I walked toward the villa and climbed the steps to the front door. I knocked before entering and was immediately bombarded by gushed greetings and a strong smell of coffee. I gave polite 'hellos' and immediately honed in on the coffee.

"Okay, now that the last one has arrived," Alice yelled over the many voices and giving me a pointed glare, "Let's discuss the agenda for today. First we're all going for a horseback ride on the beach, then to the spa for massages, facials, and manis & pedis. We'll spend a couple of hours on the beach before we split to get ready for the rehearsal dinner. Any questions?"

The group all shook their heads in unison.

"Okay, let's go! We've ordered a limousine for the day to take us everywhere, so go easy on the free champagne!" She squealed.

I chugged down my coffee as quickly as possible without burning my tongue and followed the group out the door. As we waited on the deck for the car to show up, I took a moment to examine the group of women who would be my companions for the day.

There was Rose, of course, looking every bit as gorgeous as always. Alice's mother, grandmother, and aunt were also present. Jasper's sister, Maria, who was also a bridesmaid, was with us. And then there were Maggie and Siobhan who were colleagues of Alice's at University of Toronto; although they weren't part of the wedding party, they were invited to join us for the day's activities. With me and Alice that meant there was nine of us.

I sidled up to Alice and hip bumped her. "Are you excited for tomorrow?"

She looked at me with big, sparkly eyes. "I'm _so_ pumped! I've been waiting for this for a long time. I just hope nothing goes wrong." She grinned and I noticed her eyes were flitting around all over the place.

"Are we waiting for someone else?" I asked, unsure what she was looking for.

Her gaze focused on me and she gave me a huge grin. "Nope. Just nervous," she replied. At that moment the limousine pulled up so I didn't have time to question her further. I made a mental note to talk to her later.

EPOV

It wasn't difficult to figure out which villa was Alice and Jasper's – I just had to find the swankiest looking house on the beach.

I stood a ways back from the house contemplating my next move. Should I go knock on the door? If I did, would Bella be there? I had no idea if Bella was staying with them or in her own room, or how much time they would be spending together. I'd never been part of a wedding before. I guessed they would be together a lot, especially the day before the ceremony, but that was just a guess. I really had no idea.

The decision was taken out of my hands when I saw a group of loud, chatting women emerge onto the deck of the villa, Bella among them.

My breath caught in my throat as I took in her simple beauty. She was absolutely radiant in a blue dress with her long hair shiny in the soft breeze. I wanted to run to her and pull her in my arms while covering her face with kisses. My heart leapt at the thought, but my brain knew this was not the best time to approach her. She had no idea I was in Hawaii to see her and I wanted to make our reunion special after a year apart. She deserved that much.

So I watched her from my hidden spot in a grove of palm trees and caper bushes where I knew she couldn't see me. I saw her chatting with Alice just before the car showed up. I had no idea where they were headed but I was glad I hadn't made my presence known – I'm not sure I could have let her walk away after so short a greeting.

After the car pulled away I turned around and headed for my rental car. I needed something to distract me from waiting around here like a lost puppy waiting for its master to return.

BPOV

I couldn't shake the feeling that I was being watched as we piled into the limousine. I took one careful look around and saw nothing unusual so I decided to brush it off as being in unfamiliar surroundings. Between that and Alice's behaviour I was getting really paranoid, and the last thing I wanted was to ruin this vacation with my overactive imagination.

Soon enough we were all exiting the limo near a beach just outside the town of Haleiwa, where I'd passed by on the way to the hotel last night. The first thing I noticed was the smell of manure and the second thing was that we were right by Sandy Beach Stables. I swallowed thickly as I realized I'd have to sit on top of a very large, powerful beast and trust it not to kill me.

Half an hour later, after a too-brief tutorial on horseback riding, I was nervously perched atop Thor. He was a black Arabian mare with a gorgeous glossy coat, big hooves, very long legs, and I'm pretty sure he hated me. After the novelty of 'having a god between my legs' wore off, I was terrified. To give him credit he never bucked or lost control, but he certainly didn't want to obey me when I asked him to alter his course or pick up speed. And so for two hours I was the loser at the back who couldn't get her horse to cooperate.

The next two hours at the spa were much better. Because there were so many of us, we had to do rotations in groups of three. Alice, Rosalie and I started out with massages while the older ladies got facials and the rest had their nails done. As we lay under our respective towels wearing nothing but our birthday suits, Rose decided to strike up conversation.

"So, are you ready?" She asked Alice.

"Unf," she released as her masseuse hit a good spot. "Yes. Though I may never leave this table," she purred.

I chuckled. "Not even to meet Jasper at the altar?"

I could almost hear her eyes rolling. "Of course. I'm only _joking_ for god's sake. Hey Belly, have you heard from the douchmeister yet?"

I should have mentioned that my two best girl friends had taken up pet names for Jake once they saw all the shit we were going through and how most of it wasn't initiated by me.

"Yeah, we had our usual morning fight. Unnnngh," I moaned.

I heard Rose laugh. "You sound like Tanya and me. Fuck that girl," she spat.

"I believe you did," I deadpanned.

Alice giggled. "Repeatedly," she added.

"Erf," Rose grunted. "Yes, but that's all behind me now. Man or woman, Tanya was _not_ worth the drama. Take my advice, Bella, life is _so_ much better in a stable relationship."

_She has a point_, my inner voice reminded me.

"I know," I replied sadly.

The rest of the time at the spa was spent either incapable of speech or us sitting too far apart to have any kind of real conversation. When we were done I felt like I'd been spoiled – my nails were all a beautiful shade of easter egg blue, my cuticles were under control, and I was covered head-to-toe in the most luxurious moisturizing cream. Every inch of my skin was aglow and I was totally relaxed. It was a perfect time to go lounge on the beach, which is precisely where we headed upon leaving the spa.

EPOV

After wandering around the Hawaiian countryside by myself, I was feeling kinda down. I wanted so badly to see Bella and the waiting was excruciating, so to keep myself busy I went back to the hotel and rented a surfboard for the afternoon.

Normally I would hit the waves in the morning before the crowds arrived and when the blazing sun wasn't so brutal, but I was desperate for a distraction. I was too antsy to sit still any longer.

My mind was firmly planted on Bella Swan as I went through the motions of my activity. I couldn't get the image of her long, sexy legs out of my head. How would they feel wrapped around my waist? Would she be a screamer? Would she like me running my fingers through her long, beautiful hair?

Would she even let me do any of that to her? _That_ was the big question.

My history with Bella was unusual. We'd had a great time together in LA after only just meeting a couple of hours beforehand. It was as hard for me when we parted as it was for her, but I'd been the one insisting on being realistic. At the time I felt I had to push her away, more for her sake than mine. I felt that doing a long distance relationship would only hurt us both.

I regretted that now. Oh boy did I regret that decision.

It took "the incident" with Jacob Black for me to wake up and recognize how fucking stupid I'd been. This was _Bella Swan_, no one else in the world would treat her the way she deserves. She was a gift sent to earth from providence, or fate, or the universe. She was absolutely perfect for me and I'd turned her away. Multiple times. And the worst part? I'd never told her how I felt. I shouldn't have tried to let her go when everything in my soul screamed that she was something special.

I knew she was special, there was no way to deny that fact. Every time we chatted on Skype I felt like my world tilted on its axis. My palms got clammy and I always tried to look presentable like we were on a date. Even the sight of her name in my e-mail inbox sent my stomach fluttering.

I never should have convinced myself she'd be better off finding someone else. I'm so fucking stupid.

I was suddenly interrupted from my musings when I noticed two things. First, I was starting to get pruney. Second, I saw Alice strut onto the beach with a group of women, Bella included. The only reason I noticed is because Alice was wearing the most sparkly pink bikini I'd ever seen, and the glare was actually hurting my eyes.

I rolled off my board and floated in the water, hiding as much as possible in the waves. I watched them lay out their towels, set up umbrellas, and wedge the cooler in the sand. I know I was being pervy as I stared at them but my peeping was rewarded when I watched Bella pull the gorgeous blue dress over her head to reveal the sexiest red bikini tightly hugging her gorgeous curves. My cock twitched with desire as I ogled her flat stomach, curvy hips, pert breasts, and those legs… they seemed to go on forever.

_Man up, Cullen. It's now or never_.

With a strong grip on my surfboard, I walked slowly to the shore, my eyes never leaving Bella. She was chatting away with an older woman seated next to her, smiling and nodding politely as the woman rambled on.

Alice was the first one to see me. She gave me a shit eating grin and jabbed Bella hard in the ribs. Bella turned her attention to Alice with a frown, and when Alice motioned toward me I saw every emotion flicker across her beautiful face.

Confusion, shock, disbelief, understanding.

Within seconds she was off her towel and running toward me, a la Baywatch, as I dropped my board in the sand to greet her. What I didn't expect was for her to jump into my arms and wrap her legs around me, not all that different from my earlier fantasy.

"Edward! What are you doing here!" She squealed while hugging me tightly.

"Surprise!" I replied with a grin.

BPOV

I loved Alice and all her family, but I was much more interested in relaxing than talking to Alice's grandmother about how much beach fashion has changed since the 1930s. That was Alice's area of interest, definitely not mine.

So when Alice elbowed me in the ribs I was both irritated at the mild pain and grateful for the interruption. And when she motioned to the gorgeous hunk who was knee deep in water, that I'd only half noticed, I was confused at first. Until recognition dawned on me.

Is that…? No, it couldn't be! But I'd recognize those board shorts anywhere. How is this possible? What's he doing here?

_Shut up! Who cares? He's here!_

I jumped up from my towel and ran toward him as fast as my legs would allow. He gave me that sexy, panty-melting crooked grin and dropped the surfboard on the ground before taking a few steps in my direction. He was absolute perfection with his hard, wet body – I couldn't ignore the pool in my bikini bottoms or the tingles I felt in my stomach.

It didn't matter. Edward was here!

I jumped into his arms as he gripped my thighs, pressing myself to him as hard as I could manage. I fit so perfectly in his embrace, and he felt so _good_ and _right_. I heard him chuckle when I asked why he was here, and his only response was "Surprise!"

But it didn't matter why or how he got here. The only thing I cared about was making up for lost time. I knew I'd missed him terribly, but until we were connected like this I didn't realize how empty I'd felt without him around me. Being wrapped in his arms was like finding something I never knew had gone missing.


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: If you like this chapter and the way things are headed, please let me know!**

*****Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight. I'm just a peeping tom.*****

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EPOV

As I put Bella back down on her feet – grudgingly I might add – I saw Alice walk up next to us. Her pink bikini nearly blinded me.

"Hello Alice," I said shyly.

"Edward," she nodded, "Nice to finally meet you."

Bella looked back and forth between us with her mouth hanging open like a fish trying to breathe underwater. It was absolutely hilarious.

"What's going on?" She finally managed to spit out.

Alice gave her a conspiratorial grin. "Oh, by the way, Edward might be meeting us in Hawaii."

If looks could kill…

"You _planned_ this?!" She yelled at Alice, who only nodded and tried not to laugh.

"It wouldn't be much of a surprise if you knew ahead of time," I cut in.

She turned to look at me and I saw tears forming in her eyes. I instantly felt bad about the whole thing – had I upset her?

I reached to her face to caress her cheek. "Guess I don't have to ask if you're surprised."

Her eyes closed as she leaned in to my touch. "This was the best surprise I've ever gotten. Thank you," she whispered.

Alice rolled her eyes and grabbed her arm. "Come on, let's all sit down. I need us back in the shade before we get tan lines."

We walked back to Bella's little beach camp. She plopped down and adjusted the umbrella so she was out of the sun's rays, then motioned for me to sit across from her on the towel. I happily obliged.

"So how long have you known about this? When did you get here? How long are you staying?" She babbled excitedly.

I couldn't help chuckling. "Well let's see. I contacted Alice on Facebook two weeks ago, yesterday, and one week. Anything else?"

She grinned and playfully shoved my shoulder. "Yes! Where are you staying and how did you know to find us here?"

I pointed to the hotel behind her. "I'm in room 203 with a really crappy view. I had no idea you'd be here at this exact moment, _that_ part was coincidence. Alice told me where the rehearsal dinner was happening tonight so I figured if I didn't find you before that then I'd show up there and surprise you."

"Oh, by the way, Edward?" Alice interrupted.

"Yes?" I said hesitantly. She had a shit eating grin on her face that I didn't entirely trust, knowing how sneaky she could be.

"Are you free tonight and tomorrow?" She asked innocently.

I pretended to think about it. "I'll have to rebook my hula lessons and group orgy, but I could be available."

Alice laughed. "Good, cuz I heard there's some big dinner tonight and a wedding we were planning to crash tomorrow. And Bella needs a date for both," she said before winking at me.

Bella covered her face in embarrassment. "Oh my god, Alice! Be more obvious why don't you?!"

She shrugged and opened up a fashion magazine. "It's the truth."

Bella peeked at me through her fingers. "Well?" She asked timidly.

"Of course I'd love to go with you. But I should tell you I don't put out on the first date," I said teasingly.

_We have all week for that_.

BPOV

After the initial shock of seeing Edward wore off, we had a great time at the beach. We sat there chatting and catching up, laughing and joking, teasing, smiling, and flirting. Forget cardio – my heart muscles were getting their own workout just sitting there with him in front of me. In all his sexy surferness no less. I had to literally be pried away from him by an impatient Alice to go back to my beach cottage to get ready for tonight's rehearsal dinner.

I only had an hour before Edward said he would pick me up, so the second I got back to my residence I got straight in the shower. I thought seriously about relieving some panty pressure with the removable shower head but ultimately decided against it.

I dressed in my Alice-approved-outfit consisting of a dark yellow sleeveless cocktail dress that was tight around the chest but flared out in light, swishy material around my body, giving me the feeling of floating in sunlight. I pulled my hair into a loose updo that sat on the crown of my head and pinned some fake yellow and purple flowers behind my left ear. I finished my outfit with a chunky purple choker and matching chunky bracelet paired with gold peep toe kitten heels and a gold glutch. My eyes were done in their usual smokey shades.

No sooner had I applied a layer of pale pink lip gloss when there was a knock at the door. I took a deep breath and went to answer it, trying to prep myself for what I knew I would see. Nothing in my wildest imagination could have prepared me for the sight before me.

Edward was dressed in an all white linen leisure suit with a dark green silk dress shirt. His jacket was open and the shirt was unbuttoned enough that I caught a glimpse of his gold coloured chest hair. He stood there casually with his hands in his pants pockets, leaning against the door frame, giving me a cocky grin as he watched me ogle him. I had to double check for drool on my chin when I turned around to grab my purse and key card.

"You are absolutely gorgeous," he said. I saw him checking out my legs when he thought I wasn't looking and it bolstered my confidence.

"Why thank you!" I exclaimed. "You look wonderful. I love the shirt," I gushed.

_It matches your eyes_.

"Yeah my mother thinks so too," he said with a cheeky grin.

_Did I say that out loud?_

"Yup!" He said.

"Fucking brain-to-mouth filter," I mumbled as I pulled the door closed behind me.

Edward offered me his arm to help me down the three steps to the pathway leading to the main building of the hotel.

As we walked into the private banquet room attached to the hotel's swanky restaurant, I was suddenly glad that Alice had hired a local wedding coordinator to execute all the details of the function. My eyes bugged out as I imagined the hell I would have endured trying to get everything this perfect. There were clusters of fuchsia and powder blue balloons attached to long ribbons floating from everything they could be tied to, a massive white lily and pillar candle centerpiece on the long table, and dark pink ribbons on every chair. There was even a balloon arch at the entrance. Looking around, I wondered what the wedding reception would be like if this was only the rehearsal dinner.

The wedding coordinator was a younger native Hawaiian lady in a power suit with a name tag that read Angela. She spotted us and immediately motioned for us to sit next to Alice, who was sitting at the head of the table with Jasper. The little pixie was bouncing excitedly in her seat.

"There you are! Whaddya think? Isn't it gorgeous! Angela is a genius," she rushed out.

I felt Edward tense next to me as he tried not to laugh. "It turned out well. But isn't this a bit much for a pre-wedding evening?"

Alice huffed and crossed her arms. "NO," was all she said as she glared at me.

"Oh no, why is the little pixie mad?" I heard Rose say from beside me. I looked over and immediately paled – standing next to Rose was none other than Emmett McCarty.

I liked Emmett a lot, but his close friendship to my _boyfriend_ back home had me a bit nervous. I knew I wasn't doing anything wrong. Edward was just a friend and I'd had no idea he would be here. But that didn't stop my heart from racing or my nervousness from showing as I greeted him with a quick hug and peck on the cheek.

"Hey, I didn't know you'd be here," I said in as friendly a tone as I could muster.

He let out a boisterous laugh that reminded me of Jake. "It was a last minute thing. Apparently Rosie here can't live without me," he said as he wiggled his eyebrows suggestively, which had Rose smacking him on the back of the head. "Ow, Rosie! What was that for?"

"For insinuating I'm anything but a strong, independent woman," she fumed and took her seat next to Edward.

Emmett sat down next to her and looked up at me. "So who's your friend here?" He asked.

"Oh, right. Emmett this is Edward Cullen. He's an old friend who surprised me by showing up here," I said, trying to emphasize the words 'friend' and 'surprised.'

Emmett nodded and extended his hand toward Edward. "Emmett McCarty," he said as he nodded politely at Edward. I tried to read Emmett's face but it was surprisingly blank as Edward shook his hand and offered a polite greeting in return.

Once everyone was seated, Alice stood up and clanged her knife on her water glass to get the group's attention. "Shush! Everyone, welcome. And thanks for coming here to make tomorrow so special for me and Jazz. Most of us have travelled a long way to get here, and some from the opposite direction," she said as she winked at Edward, "so I'm incredibly grateful for taking the time and making the effort to celebrate with us. That's all I'm gonna say except a quick note to my bridal party: do _not_ get drunk tonight. You all have to look fabulous tomorrow morning!" She trilled and sat down as the table laughed. The funny part is they all thought she was joking, but I knew better. Alice would throw a tantrum if she saw us dragging our asses through the day.

The food was brought in and set up at one side of the room on large tables. Everyone grabbed their plates and rushed over to form a line at the exotic buffet, which once again had me wondering how extravagant tomorrow would be in light of the spread before me. It looked like a traditional Hawaiian luau meal with teriyaki chicken, baked mahi-mahi, sweet baked potatoes, spinach salad, and a wide selection of fruit skewers. Everything was served in wood coloured bowls scattered among beds of bright pink and blue hibiscus flowers. It was spectacular.

Though this was technically a rehearsal dinner, there had been no ceremony practice beforehand nor was there any speeches given. Alice had insisted this be a less formal dinner full of fun and frivolity, which was emphasized when the hula dancers entered the room and performed for us in coconut bras and grass skirts. On any other occasion it might have been cheesy but somehow Alice and Angela had made it work. I was impressed.

It was a really fun night made especially great with Edward there. I had a hard time peeling my eyes away from his angular jaw and striking green eyes. He was just so heartbreakingly beautiful. Every time he touch the small of my back or his hand brushed my shoulder as he casually threw an arm over the back of my chair sent goosebumps cascading from my hairline to my girly bits. The electricity in his touch made me want to do dirty things to those kissable lips.

But of course I wouldn't dare, especially not with Emmett around giving us the stink eye all evening. I mean, what was his problem? It's not like we were sitting there making out all night. Jake might be an ass but I'm not a cheater… even though I desperately wanted Edward. So when Emmett cornered me at the buffet I knew it wouldn't be pleasant.

"Hey Bells, having fun?" He asked.

I nodded. "Yup! I'm so happy for Alice and Jasper," I replied, trying to steer attention away from me.

"Yeah," he replied, nervously shifting from foot to foot.

I sighed dramatically. "What is it? Just spit it out."

He gave me a big doe-eyed look. "Um, well… does Jake know about that guy?" He said as he pointed toward Edward, who was engrossed in conversation with Alice's grandmother.

"No, I didn't even know he'd be here until this afternoon. But Edward and I are just friends," I added.

Emmett lifted one eyebrow quizzically. "Are you sure? I've seen the way he looks at you."

This caught me by surprise. "Edward? How does he look at me?"

"Like he's dying of thirst and you're a cool drink of water."

I looked back at Edward who smiled politely at Alice's grandmother while giving me a quick wink.

"Em…" I started before he interrupted me.

"I know you and Jake have had some problems, and honestly I'm impressed you've stuck with him this long. None of the others…" he trailed off and blushed.

"Others?!" I said loudly.

He ran his hand over his chin nervously. "Shit."

My eyes narrowed as anger coursed through me. "What others?"

He sighed in defeat. "Look, I'm only telling you this because you're Rose's friend and, well, I like you. I don't want you to get hurt," he said before pausing me to take in my reaction. "Jake is a good guy, Bells. He really is. He just has a lot of shit to deal with." Emmett looked around nervously before grabbing my arm. "Come on, let's go sit outside for a sec."

We walked out of the building into the warm evening air. The sun was very low on the horizon, nearly disappearing into the sea, and with its descent the sky was full of streaky pinks, oranges, and reds. If I hadn't been upset I would have been rendered speechless by the natural beauty surrounding me. As soon as we were seated on a wood bench by one side of the building, I couldn't wait any longer.

"What exactly is going on?" I demanded in my best no-nonsense tone.

"I heard about that night when… Jake kinda… you know," he stammered.

"Yes. Go on."

"Well, that wasn't the first time it's happened. Did you know Jake's mom was an alcoholic?" I shook my head as he continued. "She used to get really drunk and hit them. All of them. Even Billy," he said sadly.

My hands flew to my face in horror. "Oh my god!"

Emmett nodded. "Yeah. So it's not really surprising Jake has problems with booze. He's completely normal when he's sober, but when he sucks down the juice he kinda turns into Mr. Hyde. He's not so bad with guys, but with girls it's like he feels the need to get defensive. His therapist said it's bottled rage from his childhood, and women are the targets because of his mom."

I nodded in understanding. "I get that. I'm a counselor too," I said.

Emmett smacked himself in the forehead. "Oh right, duh!"

I smiled grimly. "I knew there had to be a reason for it, but I had no idea it was so severe. If he's been to therapy before, why isn't he still going?"

Emmett shrugged. "My guess is it's hard on him. He loved his mom when she was sober, which became less frequent as time went by."

"What happened to her?"

"He never told you?" Emmett asked. He didn't seem surprised when I shook my head no. "She was going to leave them. Had her stuff packed up in the car ready to go. Got behind the wheel after half a bottle of whiskey and never even made it to the highway before she got wrapped around a tree. They say she died on impact," he said quietly.

It all made sense. The issues with alcohol, the underlying rage, trust issues, and bitterness toward women that mostly came out when his inhibitions were lowered. I'd seen glimpses of hostility when we fought but never to the level of that one night. I suddenly felt sad – why couldn't Jake have told me all this? I would have understood and even tried to help.

_Maybe that's why he didn't tell me._ Makes sense.

"You're not the first girlfriend he's done this to. If they manage to stick around after the drunken fighting, he tries to push them away. He's never managed to keep a relationship past six months, until now. And that's why I have to warn you – he's trying some new tactics. Jake, he's… well…" Emmett was clearly very uncomfortable getting the words out, but I had to know what I was up against.

"It's okay Em, just tell me. I deserve to know."

He nodded once and exhaled deeply. "There's been someone else. A girl. I don't know how long or how often, but I've seen them together. Hell, I've _heard_ them in Jake's room."

I inhaled sharply, trying to quell the urge to punch the wall behind us. "Are you sure? Could they just be friends?"

He gave me a sad smile. "Friends don't make the kinds of noises I heard. And they certainly don't play tonsil hockey in the kitchen. I'm so sorry, Bells."

I sat there dumbly for a moment trying to wrap my head around the situation. Jake and I had done very little but fight and have sex for the past month. There hadn't been any dates or romance, no late night chats or lunch rendez-vous, and certainly very little time spent together outside the bedroom. Either I was too tired from my long days or he was busy working late on a new project…

_Oh God!_ It all clicked into place. How stupid did I have to be to not see what was happening?

"Are you okay?" Emmett asked in a small voice.

"Yes," I replied, surprised by my honesty. "I have something I need to do right now. Could you head back inside and send Edward out here please?" Emmett nodded and stood up, stretching his arms before walking back to the entrance. "Oh, and Em?" I asked.

"Yes?" He replied as he turned to look at me with sadness etched on his cute dimpled face.

"Thanks," I said. He smiled half-heartedly and went inside.

I pulled out my phone and dialed Jake's number, not caring about the time difference.

EPOV

When I left the main building of the hotel at Emmett's request, I didn't have to look very hard to find Bella. The yelling and shrieking had me rushing to her side in worry, until I saw she was on the phone.

"HOW could you! I trusted you!" She bellowed.

_Oh boy, this can't be good._

Bella paused her frantic pacing to look at me. As she stared, I saw her face twist from anger to shock.

"WHAT THE FUCK! There is absolutely _no_ way to justify what you did, and yet you try to blame me. You are an arrogant, self-centered, ungrateful ass!"

I sighed and rubbed my temples as I sat on the nearby bench. I guessed she would be talking to Jake and that it wasn't good.

_Way to go, captain obvious. She's screaming at him, what more evidence do you need?_

Bella mouthed a silent "I'm sorry" at me before returning her attention to her phone call. "How many were there?" She said, a little more calmly.

She listened to him, nodding her head, as I noticed a tear drop down her cheek. I had to sit on my hands to keep from taking her in my arms and comforting her. Instead I waited patiently for her to be finished.

"You are a horrible person, Jacob Black. From this point on you will not contact me anymore. No calls, no texts, no surprise visits. _I hate you_!" She said in an eerily calm voice that made the hairs on my arm stand up.

When she pulled the phone away from her head and ended the call, I rose to my feet slowly. Bella turned to me, smiled sadly, and ran to me, throwing her arms around my neck as she burst into tears.

"What happened?" I asked quietly.

She sniffled a little before replying. "Jake is a lying, cheating prick. I can't believe I didn't see it."

_Aha, that explains her outburst._

"I'm so sorry, Bella. Is there anything I can do?" I said as I rubbed her back.

She shivered slightly. "I just want to go to bed and forget all about Jacob fucking Black and his good-for-nothing, two timing, selfish ass."

I pulled back and reached for her hand as she followed my lead down the pathway to her room. Once we were at the door I wasn't certain what the protocol would be. Do I come in and comfort her? Should I turn away and leave her to her thoughts?

As if she could sense my hesitation, she made the decision for me. "Thank you for walking with me. I really just want to pass out and end the day. Besides, I have to get up at the ass crack of dawn to get ready for the ceremony. I'll see you tomorrow?" She asked.

I nodded and smiled. "I'll be there."

BPOV

Waking up after an emotionally exhausting night is a bit like being hungover only without the fond memories or nausea.

As I made my way toward Alice's beach villa, my hair knotted on top of my head while wearingmy carebears pajamas, my body was craving coffee like nothing else. Thank God there was a pot ready when I got there or I might have started lashing out at someone.

The bridal party consisted of myself, Rose, and Maria. Together with Alice's older relatives, we were all plucked, primped, and polished within an inch of our lives. I was thankful Alice had the foresight to bring all these people to her villa so we could relax. If I'd had to be carted around like a bull on parade I'd be pretty pissy by the time the ceremony began.

"Where are the boys getting ready?" I asked Alice as a hairdresser pinned my freshly curled mane into a fancy updo.

"In the presidential suite, where we'll be staying for the rest of the week. Jazz checked in late last night with his make groupies. I hope the game doesn't go late. If I have to wait on his bony ass, he's not getting _anything_ from me tonight," she said with a determined face.

"Miss Alice, please relax," her makeup person pleaded.

"What game is that?" I asked.

Alice made a huffing noise since she couldn't roll her eyes. "Apparently it's some Whitlock tradition to go golfing the morning of your wedding. What a lame idea."

I chuckled to myself but kept quiet. Alice was obviously in a mood right now and wouldn't appreciate me finding humour with her distaste. And after all, this was her day. She could say whatever she wanted.

When at last the seven of us had our hair and makeup done to perfection, and everyone but Alice was dressed in their proper attire, it was time to get my little best friend into her wedding dress. We followed her into the bedroom where the garment was laid out on the bed along with her jewelry and reception shoes.

It took all three of us to get her into it. I'd of course seen the dress before, having helped her pick it out, but I was amazed at the complexity and weight of actually getting it on. The bodice was corset style, sleeveless, with a sweetheart neckline covered in pearls and rhinestones. It laced fully up her back and required a lot of finagling to get it tight enough so she wouldn't fall out of it. The skirt was knee length and poofy, full of crinoline , with little gems sewn in every few inches. She looked like a little fairy princess off to her first ball with Prince Charming.

"Oh, Alice!" Her grandmother cooed. "You look so pretty my dear! Here, let's get a picture before all the madness begins."

After posing for a few photos together, we all headed downstairs and toward the beach where the ceremony would take place. We stood off a little ways behind a grove of trees as we waited for Alice's mother, aunt, and grandmother to take their seats. Then it was game on.

The ceremony was short and sweet. None of the wedding party was wearing shoes – we all walked down the sandy aisle barefoot, the women carrying bouquets of bright pink lilies and the groomsmen wore powder blue boutonnieres. The groomsmen all looked very handsome in their black tuxes with blue cummerbunds while us ladies wore dark pink silk dresses.

The ocean made a nice backdrop behind the minister as he progressed through the ceremony. It was nearing sunset, so the colours of the sky were absolutely breathtaking as the sun's rays bounced off a few fluffy clouds on the horizon. It was like something out of a fairy tale, just like Alice's princess dress.

I'll admit I had to wipe my eyes a few times as they repeated their vows to one another, their voices filled with such love and adoration you couldn't help but be happy for them.

I sneaked a peek at the audience a few times to look at Edward in his sexy light grey suit with black dress shirt. Every time I glanced over, he was staring right at me with an unreadable expression on his face. If I didn't know better I'd think he felt something… for me… and in that moment I wanted nothing more than to press my lips to his and never pull back. For a brief moment I had a flash of us standing at the altar together, staring into each other's eyes, repeating our vows.

I quashed that thought right away. Edward had made it apparent from the beginning that we couldn't get involved and nothing had changed our situation. He was still the sexy Australian surferboy and I was still the pale Canadian social worker.

Rousing applause pulled me from my thoughts as I saw Alice and Jasper kissing frantically as the audience rose to their feet to congratulate the newlyweds. We followed them down the aisle and back toward the hotel, stopping at the tree line to put on some shoes first. As soon as we had gotten through the line of well wishers, we were whisked back to the beach for photos while the guests went inside for cocktails.

By the time we finally made it back to the reception, after Alice had continually tried my patience with excessive photo-taking, I was anxious to see Edward again. I looked around the ballroom full of people in search of his golden red mane of hair. I jumped when I felt a strong pair of hands grip my waist from behind.

"You are absolutely breathtaking," a musical voice whispered in my ear.

I smiled before turning around and wrapping my arms around his neck to whisper back, "Thank you Mr. Cullen."

I saw him swallow hard. "Would you like a drink?" He half squeaked.

I gave him my best seductive grin. "Maybe after dinner. I have to get through the toasts before I get too drunk."

The ballroom was decorated beautifully with lots of white ruffles and pink & blue accents. Alice had gone all out with balloons, flowers, candles, ribbons, and tropical fish centerpieces. The room looked like a birthday cake exploded all around us.

Though I would not have chosen the décor, I couldn't argue with Alice's taste in food. We had a tossed greens salad, artichoke soufflé, sirloin steak, and dark chocolate mousse for dessert. The speeches were done between courses of the meal and followed by hearty toasts to Alice & Jasper's future. Everything worked flawlessly.

When at last they had cut the cake – a six tiered red velvet delight – the DJ took over for the party. He played the standard wedding favourites, including the chicken dance, mixed in with more modern stuff. There were some oldies for the elderly generation, classic rock for the youngsters, a tango tune for the dancing inclined, and everything in between. I was kept thoroughly busy chatting with all the guests as I wandered around the room.

When the first slow song played that I was actually free to enjoy, Edward immediately grabbed my hand and pulled me to the dance floor.

"I love this song," he gushed.

I giggled, feeling a little tipsy. "Big bad Edward Cullen likes a slow, romantic song? I thought guys weren't supposed to admit that kind of stuff."

He grinned. "I'm not most guys."

_He certainly isn't_.

Edward held me tight against him as we swayed our hips to the beautiful song…

_In all my life _

_I've prayed for someone like you_

_And I thank God that I, that I finally found you_

_For all my life _

_I've prayed for someone like you_

_And I hope that you feel the same way too_

_Yes, I pray that you do love me too_

_Said, I promise to never fall in love with a stranger_

_You're all I'm thinkin' of, I praise the Lord above_

_For sending me your love, I cherish every hug_

_I really love you_

_And all my life, baby, baby, I've prayed for someone like you,_

_And I thank God that I, that I finally found you, baby_

_All my life I've prayed for someone like you_

_And I hope that you feel the same way too_

_Yes, I pray that you do love me_

_You're all that I ever known _

_When you smile, on my face, all I see is a glow_

_You turned my life around _

_You picked me up when I was down_

_You're all that I ever known _

_When you smile on your face all I see is a glow_

_You picked me up when I was down_

_You're all that I ever known _

_When you smile on your face all I see is a glow_

_You picked me up when I was down _

_And I hope that you feel the same way too_

_Yes I pray that you do love me too_

I listened to the lyrics as tears filled my eyes. I wasn't necessarily a religious or even spiritual person, but in that moment I did thank God for sending me this man, this gift, this passion. Everything about him appealed to me, from the way his hard body felt under my fingers to his sex-messed hair, from infallible realism to hopeless romantic. No one had ever made me feel more cherished or worthy of love before. I mean, who hops on a plane for nine hours to surprise someone he barely knows?

It was then that I realized just how well Edward really _did_ know me. He knew me better than I knew myself.

That was the night I fell deeply, irrevocably, hopelessly in love with Edward Anthony Cullen.


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: I'm so sorry for the long wait. There are no words to describe how busy real life has been for me lately. To make up for it, this is a longer chapter with the first ExB lemon!**

* * *

When the sunlight hit my closed eyelids I couldn't ignore the upcoming day any longer. I was deliriously happy and just wanted a few more minutes to relax and bask in the irresponsibility of vacationing. For five more days I wouldn't have to drag my ass out of bed at an ungodly hour; it was nicer than words could describe.

I stretched my limbs lazily, half opening my eyes as I rolled my face out of the sunlight which was peeking through the billowy curtains covering the sliding doors of my beach cottage. I assessed my physical state: Hungover? Nope. Hungry? A little. Dirty? Dear God yes. I grabbed the phone next to my bed and ordered some coffee before running into the shower like I had bees chasing me.

I emerged just in time to hear the knock at the door. Wearing nothing but a bathrobe and slippers with my hair wrapped up in a towel turban, I answered the door. Instead of coffee I came face to face with Edward Cullen and his shit eating grin.

"Slept in a little?" He asked as he eyed my outfit.

I huffed. "Hell yes. This is my vacation. I don't intend to see many mornings this week."

He laughed. "Fair enough. Can I come in?"

I moved out of the way so he could enter. "I've got coffee coming any minute. Could you answer when they get here? I need to get dressed and stuff. Which reminds me, what should we do today?"

He grinned mischievously. "Wear your swimsuit."

An hour later, the caffeine was slowly working its magic in my brain cells as Edward led me to a beach at the north-east end of the hotel complex which, I noted, was quite extensive. It took us a good half hour to get there. I was perplexed until we walked up to a little kiosk on a small boardwalk a bit back from the beach. It had a sign on the front that read 'Kuilima Cove Snorkeling'.

"How did you think of this?" I asked him excitedly.

He shrugged and winked at me, which sent my pulse racing. "I asked myself what a tourist from a non-tropical country would want to do. Then I asked the desk clerk at the hotel and she gave me some brochures."

"Perfect," I said as I walked toward the little shop.

A half hour of practice snorkeling in shallow waters and I was ready for more. I noticed a group of touristy looking people about thirty metres away doing the same thing I was, but with an instructor to guide them. We waded over to the group to join in the activities.

"Are there sharks?" I asked the guide.

He smiled politely as if I was a child asking for ice cream. "Yes, but there aren't many out at this time of year. They prefer to be closer to the uninhabited islands for mating season. We should be safe."

He didn't ease my anxiety. "What do we do if we see one?"

Edward touched my arm lightly, sending sparks of electricity throughout my body. "Don't panic, and don't make any sudden movements. They usually don't go after humans unless they smell blood. And I'll be right next to you," he said.

I nodded in agreement and headed to deeper waters, but before we got too far Edward grabbed my arm.

"Are you ready?" He asked, one eyebrow quirked.

I looked out before me, where most of the others were already out floating on top of the waves comfortably. It didn't look too difficult.

"Yes. Just please, don't let go," I pleaded.

"Never," was his only reply before handing me my flippers. Once I got all my equipment in order, we started swimming toward the rocky reef at one end of the sheltered cove.

It took me a few minutes to really get the hang of it, but once I did I was glad we'd come out here. I felt like we were in another world. Everything below us was so magical and colourful, from bright pink coral to schools of vibrant fish. I'd never realized how much _life_ was in the ocean before. There were manta rays skimming the sandy sea floor, forests of kelp waving in the slow current, and fish everywhere. I saw starfish climbing lazily on the rocks and the occasional sea turtle leisurely swim by. I was convinced one of them gave me the stink eye when it had to change course to make way for us.

I shrieked a little when Edward pointed out the eel slithering between flowery looking coral, and I'm sure my blood pressure skyrocketed when we saw a few small sharks (not Great White sharks, much to my relief), but otherwise it was absolutely wonderful. I barely noticed when Edward pulled on my arm, indicating we should head back to shore. We'd nearly swum out of the sheltered cove.

As we returned the equipment to the rental shack, I bounced up and down with glee. "That was amazing! Did you see all those fish? And how they swim together? It's incredible!"

Edward laughed and said, "I'm glad you liked it." I almost didn't notice when he grabbed my hand as we walked back toward the hotel. _Almost_.

"Have you ever been snorkeling before?" I said nervously, trying to unpack the meaning behind this gesture.

_Does he want me as bad as I want him?_

"Once, when I was a kid, Mum took me out to the Great Barrier Reef. I barely made it out of the boat I was so scared. There was a jellyfish warning that day. I've always hated those things."

I nodded and bit my lip nervously, not sure where to go with the conversation. Do I bring up our close contact? Or should I shut up and go with it? I stewed it over and over in my mind, working myself up to a decent panic attack, before Edward stopped and turned to me.

"Can I ask you something?" He said, looking almost as nervous as I felt. I nodded wordlessly before he continued. "I'd like… would… can I ask you out for a date? With me, tonight?" He stammered. If I hadn't been so focused on his words I might have laughed at his behaviour.

"Date?" I blurted out without thinking.

He nodded hesitantly. "Yes. I was thinking dinner. The hotel does a great luau every evening…"

I looked down nervously, taking note of our joined hands. I wanted this, very badly, but I was keenly aware of his words to me at LAX more than a year ago.

"_We barely know each other. I can't uproot myself for someone I just met, and I doubt you would do the same."_

I took a deep breath. "But you said…"

"I know what I said," he interrupted. "But that doesn't mean I didn't just spend the last year regretting my decision. So please, don't make me beg."

I looked deep into his emerald eyes which were creased in the corners from frowning. He was studying my face so carefully for a reaction, but little did he know there was only one answer I could give him.

"Okay, but I don't put out on the first date," I said before grinning as I used his words from two days ago against him.

EPOV

With baited breath I waited for her reply. It couldn't have been more than a few seconds but it felt like hours or days. Would she say no? Would this ruin our friendship?

I couldn't blame her if she turned me down. I was the one who pushed her away last year, and in doing so I hurt us both. I caused myself many sleepless nights while giving Jacob fucking Black the opportunity to traumatize my girl.

_My girl?_

I still didn't know what would happen after this week. We were both so completely entangled in our own separate lives on opposite ends of the globe. The realist in me – the one raised by my very practical father – screamed to sit down and rationally think this through. But I was done listening to that part of me. It only caused pain, at least in this situation.

When she fed me the lines I had said only two days ago, I couldn't help the face splitting grin I knew I was sporting. My heart swelled. My pulse quickened. And damned if my palms didn't start to sweat.

After dropping Bella off back at her little cottage, I hurried up to my room. I immediately called the front desk and asked for a reservation for the evening. Then I stripped out of my clothes and took a long, hot shower. Of course I couldn't get the image of Bella in her tiny bikini out of my head, so my shower was extended as I pumped myself to that mental picture. I figured it would be better if I didn't meet her with a raging woody all evening.

Before I knew it, enough time had passed that I could go back to Bella's cottage without seeming too eager for our date tonight. But I couldn't lie to myself – I'd been waiting more than a year for this to happen and I was nervous as fuck.

BPOV

I had seen the hotel's Polynesian dining area from a distance but hadn't been close enough to examine just how _cool_ it looked. It was a platform of wood planks held up on stilts that were anchored into the shallow ocean at one end of the beach property. It was covered by a giant thatch roof with twinkle lights strung across the inside beams and tiki torches attached to the outer railing. Tables and chairs were made from bamboo and decorated with blue hibiscus patterned cushions and table cloths. Each table had a mini tiki torch on it and a vase of freshly picked lilies that wafted their aromatic scent through the air. There were about a dozen tables all mostly toward the sides, allowing for a little stage area with a sound system at the back and a dance floor in the middle.

When we climbed the three steps from the beach up to the platform, we were greeted by the hostess who was dressed in a grass skirt and coconut bra. She put leis around our necks and directed us to a table near the dance floor which she promised would be the best view for the show. I felt like a kid in a candy store.

"What can I get you to drink?" A waitress asked as she showed up at our table wearing the same garb as the hostess.

"I'll have a Bud," Edward answered easily. "Bella?"

"Pina colada, please."

The waitress smiled and left our table. I watched her go, wondering where the food and drinks came from, as she walked off the platform and crossed the beach to a little makeshift bar just past the sand. I saw a few people milling around the bar that I hadn't noticed when we arrived, including a man juggling fire for tips.

"I was told this is a set menu. When all the guests have arrived they bring out platters for each table," Edward said.

I turned back toward him, feeling embarrassed for getting distracted. "I suppose that makes sense. They can't exactly be wandering back and forth to the kitchen all night if it's so far away," I answered absently. I honestly didn't care, I was so focused on this evening and its significance.

Edward smiled and reached for my hand, pulling my fingers to his mouth and planting a sweet kiss on them that made my body tingle. The gesture was so simple and yet conveyed a lot of underlying meaning. I was dying to have "the talk" about our future but I kept my lips firmly sealed on that topic. I didn't want to ruin our evening. If a few nights in beautiful Hawaii was all we ever shared, then I was determined to make the most of it.

"Tell me something about you that no one else knows," he whispered as he lowered our hands to the table.

I pretended to think for a moment. "I only cut my hair once a year and only because my mother insists on it."

He burst out in loud laughter. "Really? That's too good," he said between snorts. I personally had no idea why that was so hilarious but glad he found it amusing. When he calmed down a bit he continued, "I meant something deep and profound," he explained.

"Oh!" I blushed furiously. "Oops," I added with a smile and a wink. "You first."

He gave me a knowing look and a smirk. "Hmmmm, okay. How about this. I haven't been with anyone since before you and I met."

Shocked, I replied, "Really?!"

He nodded, looking at me solemnly. I had a feeling there was more to it but I didn't want to intrude, so I let it drop.

"Okay, let me think for a minute," I said before pausing to rack my brain for something as juicy as he'd told me. "Oh, I know! I didn't tell anyone about this because, honestly, it freaked me out. A couple of months ago I thought I might be pregnant."

Edward nearly spat out his sip of beer. "What?" He said as he wiped his mouth and swallowed thickly.

"Turns out it was nothing, I was just a few days late. But it scared the hell out of me."

He gave me a curious look. "Do you not want to have kids?"

I hesitated before answering. "Of course I do, _someday_. Just the thought of being bound to Jake in that way…"

He nodded and smiled sympathetically. "I get it. But I thought you really fancied him?"

I looked away from Edward's face. I couldn't look him in the eye. "I knew pretty early that our relationship was mostly… _physical_. Jake's generally a good guy, he just… I dunno, I didn't get that feeling with him. You know, butterflies and sweaty palms kind of thing."

He gripped my hand harder. "Your palms feel kind of wet to me," he whispered in a husky voice.

I blushed and looked into his deep emerald eyes. "You're not Jake," I replied with what I hoped was a seductive smile. His responding grin lit up his entire face and made him radiate happiness.

We chatted for a little longer as the other tables filled up. I noticed it was mostly couples, including one pair who couldn't stop sucking face for more than ten seconds at a time. After another round of drinks the food was served on large wood platters with scattered flower petals around the intricate Polynesian dishes. It was incredible and mouthwatering. Edward handfed me slices of grilled pineapple and I tried to talk him into the caviar, both of us smiling and laughing the entire time.

Despite being surrounded by people the evening felt very intimate, like we were in our own little bubble. Edward's striking green eyes glowed in the waning twilight and his golden hair showed off more reddish highlights than usual. I was once again struck by his natural beauty and had to stop myself from leaning over and nipping at his chiseled jaw. He was a glorious sight to behold.

After the dinner trays were taken away, the evening entertainment began. Edward scooted his chair around so he was sitting next to me as we watched a traditional hula dance, complete with a fire dancer and drummers. The girls in their grass skirts and leis shimmied their hips and bumped to the increasingly fast rhythm pumped out by the drummers as they circled around the stage. It was entrancing and fascinating – I felt my anthropology training nagging to analyze every facet of their performance. Thankfully Edward's wandering hands distracted me from my academic brain.

He was a perfect gentleman, never touching me inappropriately or in any way that made me uncomfortable. But the feel of his fingers tracing light circles on my thigh just above the knee, or how he draped one arm over my shoulder and pulled me close sent shivers down my spine. By the time the performance hit its climax my panties were completely soaked and he had yet to kiss me.

Once the dancers cleared the stage, a large man got up and announced a drink special then turned on some slow music. Couples got up and wandered to the dance floor together, wrapping themselves in each other's arms and swaying lazily to the slow rhythm. Before I could say anything, Edward was standing and offered his hand to me.

"Can I have this dance, Miss Swan?" He asked with a cocky grin.

I took his hand eagerly and stood up. "Of course, Mr. Cullen," I replied with a short giggle.

He led me to the dance floor and held my right hand with his left while wrapping his other arm around my waist. He pulled me flush against his body and rested the side of his jaw on top of my head. I realized, with amusement, we would have been dancing cheek-to-cheek if there wasn't such a height difference between us.

I closed my eyes and relished the moment. Everything was perfect, from the refreshing ocean breeze caressing my skin to the heat of Edward's hard body pressed against me. I felt his breath in my hair as he squeezed my hand. I moved my left arm from his shoulder to his chest and then lightly touched his neck, eliciting a low moan from his chest that reverberated through my entire body. I dared to lift my chin and look up at him, only to see Edward's green eyes darkened and hooded with desire.

I licked my lips with anticipation; either he was going to kiss me or I was going to force it out of him. I was tired of waiting.

Slowly his head inched lower. My eyes couldn't leave his perfectly sculpted lips as they drew nearer to mine. A jolt of heat ran down my spine and radiated outward leaving me tingling in its wake. He moved closer and I could barely contain my adrenaline as my heart beat furiously in my chest. When his lips finally brushed lightly against mine, it was absolutely perfect. I was certain at that moment that the planets were aligned and the entire universe was in perfect harmony.

His warm, moist lips felt so _perfect_ against mine as we moved in sync, slowly exploring each other's mouths. He parted his lips and lightly ran his tongue along my lower lip, asking for entrance which I granted eagerly. The moment our tongues collided I couldn't hold back the groan of pleasure from bubbling up and out my throat. Edward Cullen tasted divine, like lilacs and honey and cinnamon all rolled into one. And the way he massaged my tongue with his, or nipped my lip with his teeth, or how his hand slowly traveled down to cup my ass, just made me weaker in the knees.

I was a fool for this man and he wanted me. Could my life be more perfect?

_What are you still doing there? Get him naked!_ For once I agreed with my inner monologue.

Reluctantly I pulled back and said, "My room. Now."

He snickered and replied, "I thought you didn't put out on the first date?"

I quirked one eyebrow in challenge. "If you count our time in Los Angeles, then this technically isn't our first date. So unless you have some other snappy comeback, I'd like to get you alone now," I said assertively.

His eyes darkened in response as he led me to our table where he quickly paid for our dinner. I'm pretty sure we were out of there and headed back to my cottage in under two minutes flat.

XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoX

The hotel room door was barely closed before I found myself pinned against the wall with Edward's warm, moist lips devouring my neck. His hard body pressed against mine, his hands feverishly grabbing at my hips as his warm breath raised goosebumps on my skin. I couldn't stop the guttural moan pouring out my mouth as my nails dug lightly into his scalp.

He felt so _good_ I couldn't help myself. It was like my brain turned off and primal instinct took over as my body screamed for Edward. His scent surrounded me, his heat enveloped me. Even though I couldn't think I also couldn't conceive of anything that wasn't Edward Cullen. At that moment the stars aligned and the cosmos was balanced as Edward and I _finally_ unleashed a year's worth of pent up desire.

Edward pulled back from my neck and gazed deeply in my eyes.

"You are so beautiful," he murmured before bringing his lips down to brush mine lightly.

This sweet, tender kiss quickly turned desperate as desire flooded my veins, and my panties, inspiring me to force my tongue in his mouth and push him backward toward the bed. I felt my hands pulling his shirt out of his pants and rubbing the tight muscles of his abdomen, but I wasn't fully aware of my actions – my attention was focused on his hands aggressively palming my breasts, and the delicious feelings he stirred within me. When I ran out of air I pulled my face back from him and turned on my most seductive glare.

"Edward, take me. I'm yours."

"Oh God," he growled as he reached down and lifted my dress up over my hips. "Put your arms up," he instructed. My dress was over my head and on the floor within seconds.

Edward took in a deep breath as he stared at my body. I felt my cheeks flush as he carefully took in every detail, from my curled brown hair to my white satin push-up bra, down to my matching satin thong and manicured toes.

"Bella… you are perfect. So soft, so sexy…" he trailed off as his eyes fixed firmly on my thighs that I was rubbing together, desperate for friction. His eyes snapped up to my face as he gave me that gorgeous crooked smirk that only increased my need to be touched.

I stepped forward and allowed him to caress my hips and butt as I unbuttoned his dress shirt and pulled it off, then fumbled with the button on his pants.

"Fucking shit…" I cursed lowly as I failed at my task.

He chuckled. "Need some help?" He reached down to his fly before I could respond.

This time I took a step back and watched as Edward seductively lowered the zipper and pulled his pants down. He kicked them off his ankles and stood before me, allowing me to drink in the sight of him. And drink I did.

Though I'd seen him shirtless before, it was something else to see him standing there in only tight boxer briefs. He looked like he was carved from marble, although a bit more tan than he'd been last year. His broad shoulders and strong arms petered down to his tight six-pack abs and narrow waist, where a light trail of hair and the V-lines of his muscles pointed downward to the biggest bulge I'd ever seen. I didn't even get to ogle his prominent thighs or toned calf muscles – my eyes were stuck firmly on his member. I didn't realize how long I'd been staring until Edward cleared his throat.

"Bella?" My eyes snapped up to his face and I blushed furiously.

"Sorry, I…"

"It's okay," he interrupted. "I'm glad you like what you see." His grin widened with his words.

I gave him one last look over before jumping into his arms and wrapping my legs around his waist. We kissed passionately, our tongues exploring each other's mouths hungrily. If I lived to be a hundred years old I knew I'd never tire of kissing Edward Cullen.

I let out a little squeal when Edward bent forward, dropped me on the bed, and immediately straddled his body on top of mine. The heat coursing between us enveloped me completely, radiating from my brain and my heart all the way down to my toes. To say my girlie bits were dripping and on fire would be an understatement.

Edward removed his lips from mine and took a deep breath before kissing down my neck to my chest. He pulled the bra cup down from my left breast and took my nipple in his mouth, swirling his tongue around my hardened bud. My back arched upward as I involuntarily tried to increase the pressure.

"Oh God, Edward," I moaned.

He released my nipple to say, "Yes? Is here something you want?"

I squirmed under his emerald gaze. "Don't tease," I begged.

He smirked. "Then tell me what you want," he crooned before leaning down to nibble at my other breast.

"You… you know… what I-I want," I stammered, trying to remain coherent despite the adrenaline coursing through my body.

His mouth once again released my breast as one of his hands traced down my stomach and under the elastic of my thong, sending shivers up my spine. I watched his long, lithe fingers dance around as he tugged at the lace seductively.

"I can see you want _something_," he teased, "But unless you tell me what that is, I'm going to have to guess."

Edward released the waistband of my panties and traced his finger down to my intimate area, touching me lightly before moving the scrap of soaked fabric to the side and forcing my legs apart. He repositioned so his face was right between my legs, the front of his body lying flat on the bed. He inhaled deeply as he glanced at my face with dark green hooded eyes.

"My God, you smell divine…" he murmured before suddenly reaching out with his tongue and taking one long lick from slit to clit. My legs shook and my hips bucked involuntarily at the contact. "Fuck, I've never tasted anything so good…" he trailed off before attaching his mouth to my bundle of nerves as he slipped two fingers between my folds.

Edward finger fucked me slowly and carefully as his tongue swirled expertly around my most sensitive spot. Each time I felt a flood of liquid seep out of me, his mouth was right there to eagerly lap it up. I felt the pressure in my abdomen climbing dangerously high when Edward began curling his fingers to reach that sweet spot inside me.

"Edward!" I cried out. "Stop!"

He ceased his ministrations on me and looked up worriedly. "Did I hurt you?"

I took a deep, calming breath. "No, I'd just rather… _finish_… with you inside me," I explained between breaths as the muscles in my legs finally relaxed a bit.

Without giving it a second thought, Edward stood up and pushed down his boxers, flicking them off his foot. My eyes bulged at the sight of his stiff, throbbing cock. It had to be the biggest one I'd ever seen. To be honest it scared me a little – Jake used to complain I was tight, but Edward was much more endowed. How was that going to fit inside me?

Sensing my hesitation, Edward whispered, "I'll start slow. Do you have a rubber?"

I shook my head. "I'm on the pill and I'm clean," I replied.

He grinned and crawled back onto the bed and positioned himself above me, his monster cock barely caressing my entrance. I had to stop myself from pushing his ass with my feet to get him inside me. Edward leaned down on his elbows and caressed my face with his beautiful hands as he peppered kisses all over my cheeks, nose, and eyelids.

"Just relax, if it hurts just tell me and I'll stop," he whispered. I nodded nervously and gripped his back for dear life.

EPOV

Pleasuring Bella had been my fantasy for so long that I almost lost myself in her delicious taste. Lying there with her legs wide open for me was better than anything I'd imagined in my most erotic daydreams. I was hard pressed to stop when she asked me to.

And if I thought tonguing her was heavenly, I was taken to a whole new level as I squeezed my hardness inside her sopping wet entrance. Despite the lubrication it was slow going as I pushed my way inside of her. I had to keep reminding her to relax – I'm not normally one to brag, but I am well-endowed and women have had difficulty in the past.

It took all my mental willpower not to push right in all at once. She was so tight and hot, and my body craved her in ways I'd never experienced before. Even when I was fully sheathed inside her I wanted more. Instead I wiggled my hips a little and watched her face flush with excitement.

"Are you okay?" I asked. She bit her lip and nodded, giving me the go ahead.

I pulled out a little more quickly than I had entered and pushed back in. With each thrust I picked up the pace a little while still trying to remain in control. If I had my way I'd be fucking her senseless already.

"Unnnhhhh," she moaned as her eyes rolled into the back of her sockets. "So… good…" she panted.

"Yeah? You like how I fuck you?" I replied.

Bella pushed her hips up to meet my still quickening pace. "Oh Gooooddddddd," she cried loudly.

I watched her face twist with ecstasy as she took every inch of my rock hard member in her tight snatch. I can honestly say I'd never seen or felt anything so divine. The way her head twisted from side to side as she bit down on her lip, how her nails dug into the muscles of my back, and the loud "slap, slap" of our sex filling the room all pushed me closer and closer to the edge. But I held back. There was no way I would finish before Bella had her moment.

Luckily that moment came quickly. I felt her entire body go rigid as her mouth popped open. She opened her eyes to stare into mine and I swear I felt the earth shift on its axis as her pussy contracted around me and her body shook violently.

"Yeah Bella, come for me. Come hard on my cock," I whispered. Her only reply was to grip my body close to hers as I felt a surge of wetness between us. It was the hottest thing I'd ever experienced.

I took this opportunity to pound her harder, the muscles in my body screaming for more, as I came close to my own climax. I leaned down and took one of her breasts in my mouth, sucking and tweaking her nipple while moaning my pleasure. I felt the telltale heat in my abdomen as it radiated outward to my limbs, and within seconds I pushed as far into Bella as I could manage while releasing my seed inside her with a loud grunt. A couple more pumps elicited another large spurt before I pulled out and collapsed on my side. Bella didn't move.

"Are you okay?" I asked as my breathing returned to normal.

"Wow," was her only reply.

I couldn't help the grin from spreading across my face.

* * *

**A/N: I'd really appreciate feedback on the lemony stuff. It's more difficult for me to write, so any comments/criticisms would be greatly appreciated!**


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: Thank you for all your kindnesses and for sticking with the story so far. Unfortunately we have more angst before all is resolved, so take a deep breath and prepare yourselves! And as always, feel free to check in. :)**

* * *

I've always hated waking up the morning after having sex for the first time. It didn't matter if that person was a boyfriend or not (though I've admittedly had very few 'nots' in my life). It's just an awkward time. When you open your eyes and realize what happened, a million things happen in those few seconds before words are spoken. First are the long line of questions: Does he regret it? Did I do okay? Should I wake him? What happens now? Then there's the debate of a good morning kiss vs. relieving bladder pressure, how soon is too soon to shower, and the maddening wondering about clothing protocol – just because he saw me naked last night doesn't mean it's okay for us to walk around in the buff.

Luckily today, the first morning after relieving some 'tension' with Edward Cullen, I had very little time to freak out. When I finally opened my eyes he was already awake and staring at me with a smile playing on his lips.

"Good morning," he cooed before leaning in to kiss me.

"Mmmmmm," I replied as our lips met. When he pulled away I added, "It _is_ a good morning."

He chuckled and maneuvered himself out of bed, not bothering to put any clothes on. I couldn't help but stare at his finely sculpted ass as he walked over to the phone and picked up the receiver.

"Hi, we'd like some coffee please. And some pancakes, scrambled eggs, and croissants. It will be cash. Thanks," he said before hanging up. He turned around and smirked at me ogling his sexy form before sashaying his hips as he walked back to bed. "You have about fifteen minutes if you want to shower before breakfast arrives," he said with a mischievous grin. "But I could think of a better way to pass the time…"

My skin heated up with my blush. "How about after breakfast we shower together?" I replied as I batted my eyelashes at him.

He grinned. "I like that idea."

Edward wandered into the washroom where I heard him puttering around. In a way I was relieved that I had a few moments to process my crazy whirling thoughts. What the hell happened yesterday? I went from thinking we were spending another vacation together, as friends, to a romantic date and then spending the night together. It almost seemed surreal. If I couldn't hear him whistling through the bathroom door I might not believe it actually happened.

Thinking about how we spent the night stirred my girlie bits awake, and I found myself remembering every little detail that spun me out of control last night. The way he'd brought me to orgasm so easily, or how his green eyes burned with passion, or even the quickie we'd had when we woke up in the middle of the night. How talented his fingers were, though not as amazing as his tongue, and how he _stretched_ me so divinely.

Mmmm, now that I thought about it, a repeat this morning might not be possible with the soreness I felt creeping up on me. Damn, Edward Cullen has a huge-

KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK.

"I'll get it," I called. Edward ran out of the bathroom with a towel around his waist.

"Don't you dare! Get back in bed missy. I aim to treat you," he threatened playfully.

After enjoying breakfast in bed, with Edward practically spoon feeding me my pancakes and 'accidentally' dripping syrup on my breasts, he put the trays on the little table and crawled on top of me in bed. Edward leaned down and licked at the stray syrup with the tip of his tongue, teasing me and flooding my womanhood with desire.

"Mmmm, that feels so good, but I don't think I can…" I said sadly.

His head popped up. "Why?"

_Does he look angry?_

"Oh, um… I'm still kind of… _recovering _from last night," I stammered nervously.

His head cocked to the side. "What do you mean?"

I cleared my throat before responding, "I'm in a bit of pain. You're much more… gifted… than you realize." I lowered my eyes in embarrassment.

He started laughing so hard he rolled over onto his side and gripped his stomach. When I frowned at him it only spurred him on even harder, and soon I joined in with him. His amusement was too infectious.

"You… suck…" I said between giggles.

He let out a loud bellow. "Sorry," he panted, "I've never… been called gifted… before!" He said before shrieking with laughter.

I smacked his ass playfully. "Liar," I half giggled and half growled. A few more chuckles and he was wiping the tears of amusement from his eyes.

"Oh lordy, that was good. Now to be serious, do you need some painkillers? I can run to the store in the main building," he offered.

I pointed toward the bathroom. "I have some in my toiletry bag."

An hour later, my body numb from the drugs, Edward and I were still lying around in a state of nakedness. He seemed inclined to be lazy and I certainly wasn't complaining, though I felt kind of useless doing absolutely nothing when I had so much on my mind. I had to stop myself from getting up and tidying the room just to distract myself from the whirlwind of thoughts and emotions.

"Got something on your mind?" Edward asked as he lay on his side with his head propped up on one hand.

"Yeeeeessss," I said hesitantly. I wasn't really sure how to begin, and the sight of his massive limp dick was making thinking very difficult.

He smiled. "I know you're dying to have 'the talk' right now. I know the way your mind works. But can I ask one favour?"

I nodded. "Sure."

"Let's leave it until after dinner. Can we have one more day before things get complicated?"

I sighed. "Why does talking have to complicate things?"

He shrugged. "It doesn't, but it means putting things into words that I'm not quite sure how to say. I don't know about you, but my brain is all over the place right now. I need to sort some things out before I explain them."

I nodded again. "Yeah I get that. Okay I will grant you this favour on three conditions," I said seriously.

He grinned. "Go ahead."

"One: we have to talk tonight," I said. He nodded solemnly. "Two: we are _not_ going surfing today. And three, I promised Alice we'd have dinner tonight."

"When did you promise that?" He asked.

It was my turn to grin. "I will, when I text her in a few minutes."

XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoX

To say Edward Cullen looked glorious in his green and black board shorts, reclining lazily on a beach chair, would be an insult to the term. He was stunning and I couldn't take my eyes off him or his deliciously toned body. Everything about him made my mouth water, from his large feet to his messy bronze hair slicked back from saltwater. As he thumbed through one of the hotel's activities guides, I was once again struck by the majesty of his long, lithe fingers.

"Bella, you're staring," he warned playfully as he looked at me over his ray bans.

"Sorry," I mumbled before pretending to turn my attention to the water. Really I was still ogling him through my peripheral vision.

"I don't mind," he said with a cheeky grin.

I rolled my eyes. "Of course not."

As we lay there enjoying the sun, it didn't escape my notice that every single woman who walked by us kept their eyes on Edward and swayed their hips just a little more as they passed. I wanted to get up from my seat and backhand each and every one of them just for thinking impure thoughts about my… well, not _my_…

With a loud sigh I reclined my chair back so I could close my eyes and block out these unwelcome thoughts with their subsequent mixed feelings. Of course I should have known it would be impossible.

I couldn't wrap my head around what was happening between us. We had a _date_. We had _sex_. Edward held my hand as we walked to the beach together. I knew he was staring at me as much as I was ogling him though we were both trying – and failing – to be subtle. What did it all mean?

I mean, a year ago when we were in Los Angeles we had an awesome time together. We talked, laughed, flirted, nursed hangovers… it was great. It was surprising because we'd only just met. I did the foolish thing and put my trust in a stranger when Edward could very easily have been a psychotic killer. Looking back on it, I hadn't made the wisest choice in doing that. But there was just something about him that drew me in and wanted more. Even though I didn't get more than friendship, at the time, I knew there were feelings between us. It was obvious then and it was clear now.

But when we parted everything went to hell for a while. I knew I was acting too clingy for someone who had been given no promises of any kind. And he had shown me, repeatedly, that nothing could happen between us. What, if anything, changed since then? When we parted, would things turn out the same way as they did last year? I wasn't sure I'd be able to handle that.

_Everything's changed. You love him._ Fuck my inner monologue and its stupid big mouth.

I realized I would have to ask Edward about that when we had our 'chat' later that night.

Yes, I've always been one of those people who had to pick apart and analyze everything. It's in my nature, being a social worker and all. But right now I wished more than anything I could shut off my stupid brain and enjoy Edward's company without wallowing. Which is why I was grateful when I peeked one eye open to see him twirling a strand of my long hair around his beautiful fingers.

"What are you doing, mister?" I said in a playful tone.

He smiled sweetly. "I was just thinking. You know, it was your hair that first caught my attention at the airport. So long and beautiful…" He cooed as his mind drifted back to that moment we met.

I smiled, remembering that moment. "For me it was your hands," I replied as I kissed his finger. He quirked one perfect eyebrow at me.

"Oh really? Do tell."

I shrugged my shoulders in an effort to feign nonchalance. "What can I say?"

He grinned at me before shifting over in his chair to attack my ribs with his fingers. "You can tell me the truth! Confess everything! C'mon, you know it was my rugged masculine features that first got you. Don't lie," he teased as he tickled me mercilessly.

I tried to fend him off but was having very little success. "Edward! Stop!" I said between giggles. He got up and suddenly was straddling my thighs, pinning me down underneath him as he continued his barrage.

"Admit it, Bella. You only liked my hands cuz you wondered if the myth about long fingers was true. Right?"

I laughed so hard my cheeks were hurting. "Yes, it's true! You win!" I gasped.

Thankfully he stopped tickling me and instead raised his hands in the air like a victorious soldier.

"Yes! I knew it!"

I giggled at his craziness as I caught my breath, my heartbeat slowing with each passing second. My chest was heaving, my cheeks flushed, and I'm sure I had a shit-eating grin all over my face. So really, it wasn't surprising when Edward looked back down at me his eyes quickly turned from a crisp emerald to smouldering, fiery green. It took me a minute to figure out why – yes I have my moments of mental density – and my cheeks flushed with embarrassment. We were by no means alone on the beach.

Reluctantly Edward crawled off me and kneeled next to my beach lounge. He ran one finger down my stomach, lingering lightly at the edge of my bikini bottoms. I thought I would combust into flames right there.

"Are you still sore?" He whispered in my ear.

I shook my head. "Not at all," I replied huskily.

Without a word, Edward jumped up and started packing our belongings. Like a whirlwind, all our stuff was thrown into our respective bags and within minutes we were headed, hand-in-hand, back toward my beach cottage. I couldn't help the grin plastered across my face.

XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoX

If I thought the first time we'd come together was incredible, then being with Edward Cullen the second time was almost indescribable. Almost.

He made my body sing in ways I'd never experienced before. The way he played me like I was a cello and he was Yo Yo Ma brought me to new heights of orgasmic bliss.

The thing I was learning about Edward is that he's one of those people who legitimately gets pleasure out of satisfying their partner. He worked so hard to bring me ecstasy time and time again, and I could tell it only fueled his desire to give me more. By the time he found his release – at the same time I did – I'd lost count of my orgasms. As he pumped his seed deep inside of me I watched his face twist into one of pure, unadulterated satisfaction as his eyes never left mine. I'd never seen anything so sexy in all my life.

Edward collapsed on top of me, breathing heavily, sweat dripping off his tense muscles. He kept his weight on his elbows as he ran his hands all over my face and showered me with light kisses.

"That was…" I began.

"Unbelievable," he finished.

I smiled at him as I brushed his long, reddish blonde hair out of his eyes with one hand and rubbed his shoulder with the other. I could tell he was in need of a break.

Edward rolled over so he was lying on his back and then pulled me to him. We lay like that for a while, enjoying the comfortable silence between us, as I listened to his heart return to its normal cadence. When I looked up into his eyes he returned my huge smile and let his lips linger on my forehead in a long, lazy kiss.

I felt completely safe and secure wrapped in his arms, like we were in a bubble outside time and space where nothing else existed. I tried to commit this moment to memory because I knew it would always be one of my favourites. Everything was absolutely perfect. His manly scent, the feel of his strong muscles, the perfection of his lean but muscular body, his even breaths, and the warmth that flowed between us… all of it combined to make me feel as though life would never get any better than it was right then. I wished Bella from one year ago could see Bella today.

Of course the moment was ruined when my cellphone rang.

"Let it go to voicemail," Edward said with a raspy voice as he ran a finger down my spine. I knew what he was up to, but I was too aware of reality by this point.

I pulled out of his grasp and reached to the nightstand to answer my phone. "Yes?" I said.

"Bella! Is that any way to treat your best friend?" Alice trilled.

I chuckled. "Sorry Alice, I'm just a little… preoccupied at the moment," I said as Edward's wandering hands cupped my backside.

"Well, if you and Edward can come up for air, I got us a reservation at the hotel restaurant. Rosalie and Emmett will be there too. See you in an hour!" She sang before ending the call. Flustered, I looked at the time and couldn't believe how long Edward and I had been going at it.

"Fuck," I said.

"That's the idea," Edward responded as he wiggled his eyebrows playfully.

I laughed at his brazenness. "I'd love to, but we have an hour to meet everyone, and Alice _will_ drag us out of here if we don't show up."

I heard Edward's chuckles as I ran to turn on the shower.

EPOV

I knew this moment would come. There was no avoiding it. It was inevitable really, with Bella being so amazing a person. Yet despite all my mental planning, nothing could have prepared me for the onslaught of protectiveness that is Alice Brandon-Whitlock and Rosalie Hale.

We were seated at the hotel restaurant where Alice and Jasper's rehearsal dinner had taken place two days ago.

_Fuck, was that only two days?_

It was a beautiful place with an interesting, diverse menu. I had a really tough time narrowing down what I wanted to eat. Eventually I decided on luau ribs in pineapple sauce and agreed to share a spread of different appetizers with everyone at the table.

I was nervous as hell. My palms were sweating, and I thanked the deities that I'd put on extra anti-persperant. Thankfully Bella kept one hand on my leg, rubbing soothing circles in my flesh as Alice and Rosalie grilled me.

"So you're a cook?" Rose asked.

"Rose," Bella intervened, "He's a chef. He runs his own catering business. I told you this before."

Rosalie waved her hand dismissively. "I just wanted to double check your story for inconsistencies. I won't have one of my best friends throw herself at another liar," she said as she gave me a warning glare.

"Rose!" Bella exclaimed. I noticed she gave Emmett a nervous glance. I decided to store that piece of information for later.

"Bella, your friend has every right to be protective of you. Especially after what just happened with-"

Bella coughed loudly, interrupting me. _I wonder what has her so worked up?_

Alice rolled her eyes dramatically before jumping in by asking me, "So where do you live exactly?"

I smiled politely. "Just north of Brisbane. If you look at a map of Australia's east coast and put your finger right in the middle, that's pretty close," I responded.

"I bet that's some great surfing," Jasper added wistfully.

I grinned at him. "Definitely. Do you surf?"

Alice giggled. "He wishes. We don't exactly get high tides on Lake Ontario. I bet he'd be grateful for a partner while we're here," she hinted. I didn't need any more encouragement than that. I'd take every opportunity to get on their good side.

"Well," I began, "I usually like to hit the waves early. We could take a jaunt tomorrow morning if you're up for it."

Alice bounced and clapped her hands. "That's a great idea! Even better, let's all spend a day on the beach together! Rose, Bella and I can be your cheerleading squad from the sand. Whaddya say?"

A quick look around the table proved that while no one would defy the smallest yet scariest of the group, they all looked just as enthusiastic about it.

Emmett piped in. "Sure, sounds like fun, but I warn you Eddie," I cringed at that nickname, "I've never tried it before. You'll have to show me some cool moves to impress my girl here," he said before leaning in to kiss Rosalie's neck.

"Done," I said with a grin.

Beside me, Bella stood up from the table and said, "Excuse me. I need to use the bathroom." I normally wouldn't have thought anything about it except that Alice and Rose both stood up and followed her.

"Do they always go together?" I said out loud, more musing to myself than expecting an answer as my eyes followed their retreat.

"Bro, I can't pretend to know what the hell goes on with women," Emmett spouted before taking a long pull from his bottle of beer. I had a funny comeback on the tip of my tongue but thought better about saying it aloud.

Jasper sighed and rubbed his temples. "Bella's nervous."

My head snapped to his face. "Why?"

Jasper nodded toward Emmett. "I think you might have to talk to her," he said.

I looked back and forth between them, growing more uneasy by the second. Why would Bella be nervous, especially around Emmett? Could it be…?

"Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know you'd been involved," I said to Emmett through pursed lips.

Emmett and Jasper gave each other amused looks before bursting out into hysterical laughter.

"Oh man, that's good," Emmett guffawed loudly.

"What?" I asked.

Jasper responded, "Bella and Emmett were never _involved_. Her ex, Jake, is one of his close friends. She's probably worried he's gonna go report back to him."

"Is she right?" I said to Emmett with narrowed eyes.

He shook his head as his laughter ebbed. "Nah. Jake's one of my oldest buddies but he's a fuck up sometimes. Bella didn't deserve what he was doing. If Jake asks, I'll tell him the truth: I don't know what's up with you guys and it's none of his business anymore."

I nodded slowly, processing this new information as Bella, Alice, and Rose returned from the ladies' room.

BPOV

I'll admit that watching Edward get along so well, so quickly with my friends was a huge relief. He'd been around them before, at the rehearsal dinner and then the wedding, but those days had been filled with so much stress that they never got to chat. It filled my heart with joy that he was so easily accepted, especially by Emmett. I'd been worried he would have some ridiculous unswerving loyalty to my cheating ex-boyfriend.

Once we finished dinner, including a few more rounds of interrogation from Rose, we all split up for the night with plans to regroup in the morning on the beach.

"Let's go for a walk," Edward suggested as he took my hand in his.

We wandered down to the boardwalk that lined the beach of the hotel. Slipping off our shoes we padded across the sand and into the shallow surf where the cool water felt good as it massaged my ankles.

"I know you probably have a lot of questions for me," Edward stated.

I looked up at the moon and sighed. "Not necessarily for you, but I'd be lying if I said there wasn't a lot on my mind."

He chuckled lightly. "I can imagine."

I walked away from Edward slightly and sat down on the sand out of reach of the shallow tide. Even under the cover of darkness I could see the concern written all over his face and it tugged at my heartstrings. After a moment's contemplation, Edward sat down next to me and reclined on his elbows as he stared out at the ocean.

"I owe you an apology," he whispered.

This surprised me. "For what?"

He smiled slightly and painfully as his eyes diverted to the ground. "For being a prat. I've done very little but hurt you since we first met."

I let his words sink in for a moment before I replied. "I won't sugar coat it. You've definitely given me mixed signals this past year. But Edward, you've also shown me what real happiness feels like. Yes there was some… confusion… about things. To be blunt I'm still confused, but the one thing I know for sure is that you make me happy. Even if we're sitting on Skype not saying anything at all."

His pained smile turned genuine as he replied, "Really?"

"Yes!" I laughed and shoved him playfully with my shoulder. He responded by wrapping his arms around me and pulling me against him. We sat in silence for a few moments before he continued the conversation.

"I don't know what to do about you, Bella Swan. I tried to be realistic so we'd both keep from getting hurt, but that didn't turn out so well. For either of us." I nodded my agreement. "Now that I've given in, I can't bear the idea of giving it all up again. I don't want to walk away from… from…" he struggled to complete his sentence.

"What? Edward, what is it?" I asked as I turned to look into his eyes. His beautiful, liquid emerald eyes that blazed at me with fiery intensity. I nearly forgot my own name.

"Bella," he whispered as he touched my cheek gently. "I love you," he whispered.

My heart melted as I replied, "I love you too. So much," my voice cracked on that last word as tears slid down my cheeks.

I wanted to jump up and run down the beach screaming with joy. I had a strong urge to fist pump, do a cartwheel, and strut around like a peacock all at once. He loves me! Edward Cullen loves me! Could life get any better than this moment?

Instead I leaned forward and placed my lips gently against his, nuzzling his mouth open and sweeping my tongue inside. He greedily accepted my advances and took it one step further by cupping the back of my head and pressing himself closer. Our tongues said the words our mouths had just declared as we kissed passionately yet reverently under the full moon and starry sky. In that moment, with Edward, I ceased to be Bella Swan, boring Canadian social worker. I was born again as Bella Swan, one half of the greatest love story ever told. And as the other half of my story poured all his love and passion into our embrace, I knew we would never be able to go back.

Unfortunately a piece of my mind tried to warn me that we hadn't actually resolved anything about our situation, but I pushed it aside for now. I wanted to cherish this moment forever.


End file.
